GROOMING : WHAT IS BEING GROOMED? YOU'RE NOT BEING DATED, YOU'RE BEING HUNTED

 

Virginia Guiffre is the most famous woman to speak out about her history of being sex trafficked and how it badly effected her emotions and thinking and changed her life. She struggled so valiantly. However, there are many other women, and some men, who have, both against Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell, and against other people, spoken out. You can find many of them on YouTube videos. Though some were abducted, many of them were groomed slowly but surely, only to find themselves living in horror.  

What is grooming? Don't feel bad if you've never heard that term because some people who have been groomed and sex trafficked didn't know those terms! It is a process, which can happen slowly or suddenly, in which a person who is an opportunist and user, a predator, and intends to sex traffic or prostitute you tries to make you comfortable with the idea of having sex with him and then strangers, perhaps first by pretending to love you, perhaps starting with being sexual with you in an OK way - but possibly by even assaulting you or abusing you, and/or buys you things but them expects you to 'pay back' by having sex with other people.

A pedophile is a person who is interested in having sex with others who are under the legal age, sometimes too young to even physically safely have sex. (Having your period is not evidence that your body is ready for sex or pregnancy or giving birth.)

If you would like to hear real women testify as to how it is they were groomed and sex trafficked I strongly suggest the YouTube station called SOFT WHITE UNDERBELLY.

YOUTUBE STATION : SOFT WHITE UNDERBELLY Uncensored videos.  Look for Kat and Karla. About being brain washed - breaking you down and turning you into what they want you to be. (A warning on these adult videos, as they may upset you terribly.)

So, I thought about it. Had anyone ever tried to groom me when I was a teen?

I think so, though it didn't go far. 

This was a man who was in his late thirties and married. He mentioned one of my friends was their babysitter and that she was his wife's "best friend." He told me about a man friend of his who was having sex with a young woman about my age. I guess he was trying to get a reaction. What did I think about that? I don't recall having an opinion to express. He mentioned being attracted to other girls and that he had kissed one of them - a girl from my school. One day he threw himself on top of me and shoved his tongue into my mouth. It was not sexy and didn't feel good. I also didn't feel afraid. Other people could have walked in at any minute, so as an adult woman I wonder why he would take such a risk. I didn't go home and tell my mother. I should have but I have to wonder what, if anything, she would have done about it. I wasn't complimented. I didn't seek him out. I have to say that I was so naive at the time, I wasn't suspicious. I didn't understand what was going on.

The thing that bothered me most at the time was that he seemed extremely interested in who among my friends was having sex. Some were, with their boyfriends who were age appropriate. 

 

POLARIS PROJECT: HOW TRAFFICKERS GROOM AND CONTROL 

END SLAVERY NOW : GROOMING FOR SEXUAL EXPLOITATION

C 2026 Mistress Manifesto - BlogSpot  All Rights Reserved including Internet and International Rights

EVERY WOMAN NEEDS A GAY MALE PAL BUT DON'T GET USED AS COVER : OPINION BY MISSY

A while back I met a man who told me that he was - well - not transgender - but born with female DNA and male characteristics. When he told me this, he said that the friends he grew up with knew about it and accepted him.  I did to - or so I thought - when I didn't know he had an agenda. Now he was in a new city and social situation and trying to make friends.. He told me he had been in love with a woman years back but his DNA problem required that he break the relationship and that everyone felt sorry for him but also understood. 

He dressed and conducted himself as a man, and as a man, he seemed to be rather sexist.

He asked me along to a lunch where he said we would be meeting up with one of his friends and be talking about literary books. I'm well qualified to be part of such a discussion. The friend is heterosexual and married and I have no idea what all he knew about the man who'd invited me. We got there and these two talked literary books, without including me in. They were putting on a performance. I was supposed to be the gal simply astounded by their knowledge. The audience. They were obnoxious. I couldn't have intruded with any commentary about any author or book.

I got it. The man with the female DNA was trying to show me off as his girlfriend to his heterosexual friend, like he was scoring points with this man for even having a woman along. I got it that I was supposed to be providing cover or proof that he was all male. Who knows what he had told this heterosexual man about me before this lunch or after. It was the last for me.

I sat there wishing I had not wasted my time. Such situations are hard for me, because my politeness kicks in, even when others are not being polite to me. Luckily the lunch place was busy, the waitress came by numerous times to give us a clue it was time for her to turn the table over to other waiting diners. We left and I determined that I would not be receptive to this man any further.

One day flowers were sent by a mystery person. There was a mystery card in the flowers and the person who had received them must have taken a bribe to keep the secret. I was not comfortable at all with this. I gave them to the person who had received them, saying there must have been a mistake made. Later, I heard her saying how "cute" and 'romantic' this gesture of his was. I realized this woman was part of the problem. 

The unwelcome flowers could have been from anyone and a man posing as a 'friend' while actually having a secret agenda was not someone I wanted in my life at al.

Not long after this, I ran into the man in a public place. I was in a hurry but could not ignore him. He used this moment to ask after the flowers and plant a kiss on my cheek, thus revealing himself. Then he pointed to his own cheek expecting a kiss there from me.  I did not. Where was this going? Clearly, because he was in a fantasy about me, he had not even bothered to ever ask me if I was available. When he next asked me to lunch, I told him that I was not available. 

Not that this man was "gay." This was before the discussion on sexuality and gender became what it is today, with so very many labels to define oneself, should you want to put one on, or out yourself.  (I do not believe anyone should be outing anyone else.) If technically he was female, but not transgender, but had a crush on me, what was he imagining?  How confusing!

Whatever it was, I didn't want or need it.  

There men who are not confused and have known they are gay - not sexually attracted to females - for a long time. The pressure on them now is to be 'out and proud' but not so long ago the pressure on them was to be 'in the closet' for their own safety and protection. I  think this is still the case in some places. I live in a big city where there is a significant gay population and areas of that city where homosexuals dominate and it's safer for them to be out. 

I have gay friends but 'm not willing to be any gay man's pretend girlfriend for the sake of his relationship with his parents or his heterosexual, perhaps gay-hating boss, or perhaps his not-tolerant heterosexual friends. Is there a real friendship there?  That's what you have to ask yourself.

Over the years I've known of a number of women who were sympathetic to a gay man's difficult situation with his parents or boss who did, willingly, act as a girlfriend, but I thought some of them were being used. I especially hated to hear gay men talking about some of those women as "fag hags."

Pre-Covid, I went with a gay friend to see him play soccer with his team. These men get right to their game, sometimes lingering afterwards for beer and some conversation. Most do not bring along family, wives, or girlfriends. I got the impression though that my friend, showing up with a woman, tweaked their curiosity, and sure enough more than one came over to ask him who I was. He said, "I will tell you. She is my friend."  I was so glad he handled this honestly.

C 2023 Mistress Manifesto - BlogSpot  All Rights Reserved including Internet and International Rights.

ABORTION AS A HUMAN RIGHT : OPINION by MISSY

I'm for CHOICE of ABORTION. It's a choice very many women have made, sometimes under pressure from the man, or family, or simply economic pressure, sometimes because the woman herself knew she was not up to carrying, birthing, or raising another human being to adulthood, at least not based on what she knew of her life at the time. I'm for choice of abortion because of rape and incest, especially of women and girls who are unable to make their own choices due to age, innocence or ignorance, or because they are of low intelligence, or some other factor. Because of sex trafficking and abduction. Because a pregnancy should never be a punishment for being the victim of predators or violence.

I'm for planning - to not have children at all - to the number and spacing of wanted children; however I know that contraception, even the pill, is not 100% guaranteed. I've met those women who got pregnant despite using contraception. A friend of mine has a cousin who had three children and got her tubes tied and still got pregnant again...They joked about the fertility of her family.

I've seen the photos of aborted fetus.  I've seen the photo of a woman who was left to bleed to death in a hotel room where an illegal abortion had been performed on her. I know she had to have been desperate.  Men are almost always involved in the impregnation, if not the decision. Men who do not want a child have been known to assume that the woman would abort if she got pregnant or to hand her cash to go have it done. 

Yet, as difficult as it is to admit, there are so many children who were born unwanted, children whose parents cannot provide for them, children whose parents are irresponsible, so we also must ask ourselves about the pain that person experiences growing up in such circumstances.

It's still complicated and difficult. Yet, I've met those who said an abortion was an easy decision if not an easy experience.

One young woman who is on the pill after having been raped by a stranger, showed me her contraceptive pills as well as the abortion pills she was sent home with from a clinic, telling me she had been advised to take them immediately should she have unprotected sex -wanted or unwanted - again.  (This I wondered about. It seemed excessive to me.) Abortion pills causing an early miscarriage taken at home are not without pain, but apparently not as dangerous as waiting and having a surgical procedure. They became available in the year 2000.  I do wonder what hormones given for any condition including menopause do to the body.  The longer the wait for any form of abortion, the more dangerous it is.

I believe that today everyone but those who intend pregnancy, cooperatively, should be using protection, to not only avoid pregnancy, but SIDS, including HIV, herpes, and chlamydia. This in itself should significantly cut down on the numbers of people having to face THE CHOICE. I'm sure that drinking or drugging to the point where you have a 'what the hell' attitude about unprotected sex is stupidity - if you're smart enough to be stupid. So I question how often the need for abortion started with an unwillingness or inability to obtain and use contraception.

What I think people are reacting to is that in the years since the 1973 Roe Versus Wade decision, medical science has improved to the point where surgery can be done on a fetus before birth.  Babies who were once doomed because they were born just so premature are being kept alive and eventually thrive. So the question of when conscious and viable life begins is there.  As a result, I think there may be some determination that abortion past a certain point in fetal development be illegal.  However, that illegality will once again push such surgeries into the hands of those who do so illegally and dangerously.  (Along with the medical doctors with training who have provided abortions for those who can afford it all along.)

My understanding is that the Supreme Court was considering not banning abortion, but moving that decision from a federal decision back to the individual states' decision. It would be much more difficult for the states to return that decision back to the Supreme Court. 

C 2022  Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot

Update June 24, 2022  My understanding is now that the Supreme Court of the United States did overturn abortion and that did automatically end abortion in states where there was a "trigger" response.  I was unaware that states had this in place.  Looking at the map, I'm glad to see that states along the West Coast and some in what we call New England, still provide.  However I will post in another place about this.

THE MISTRESS WHISPERER? TOWN AND COUNTRY EXPOSE! and OPINION BY MISSY

TOWN AND COUNTRY MAG : INTELLIGENCE - DIVORCE - MISTRESS INVESTIGATIONS


I was going to excerpt from this article, which I read in the paper copy of February 2018's edition of Town and Country, but if you don't want to subscribe, try your local library for the full text.  In the article PI (or spy) Herman Weisberg is profiled as a "Mistress Whisperer" as part of a larger article about divorce among the wealthiest of us and the way art collections are assets that need to be divvied up.  A photo which appears to be actress Glenn Close in her role as a Mistress Gone Mad, also appears above the article.  The gist of this article is that Weisberg is the one who wealthy men in New York City call to go talk to Mistresses Gone Mad, Mistresses who start threatening they will expose their affairs to the wives, for instance.  He tracts them down and just talks them down from doing the things they are threatening to do to his clients.  Talks sense to them.


I found this article interesting because while certainly there are Mistresses Gone Mad out there, there are mostly a lot of people who took marriage vows who break them and who eventually go their separate ways sadly but without all the uproar.  So much depends on individuals and their personalities, their values, the way they do life.  But Mistresses Gone Mad are to me a stereotype, a furthering of the Home Wrecker stereotype, in which it is The Other Woman who is the problem, not the Husband, not the Wife.  The man who Keeps a Woman, who has access to money to do so without his wife knowing, seems to never take the blame.  If he cheats, it's never his wife who drove him to it.





The film Fatal Attractions was hot and also crazy.  Actor Michael Douglas and actress Glenn Close were the two having the affair.  When I watched this film, I saw a lot wrong in Close's character early on.  It was clear to me she was emotionally unstable and also that she had lied that she was up for a one time experience - no strings.  But predictably enough, Michael Douglas' character is perhaps more stable, but the one who really can have a one time fling.  Maybe his backstory is that he doesn't always or even often have flings, but you suspect he's had, and as the story goes he will go unpunished.  He's the married person and the person with children, more to loose and risk. It is his wife, trying to hold her family with children together, willing to take his confession as an apology, who goes after the mistress and violently. Of course the rabbit boiling in the kitchen pot scene is very threatening. This very successful film is a modern morality tale and it also communicates that what's exciting is the battle of two women for a man.  I feel Close did such a good acting job that it stereotyped her as a person.


If you are a wealthy married man risking an affair or actually Keeping a Mistress, which isn't the same thing, you need to think it through before you ever have to hire a PI or spy to talk to your Mistress Gone Mad!  Have you entered into this extramarital relationship to help you get through a divorce or maintain a marriage?  Have you done your best to end your relationship without the rancor?  Or does it excite you to have two (or more) women fighting over you? Have you been fair to her financially?


By my way of thinking, if you've been Keeping a Mistress, and the break off or your divorce is going to impoverish her, that is not fair of a wealthy man.  I think you should provide her enough money to continue to pay her rent for a year and you should also set it up with your attorney to pay for her education, if that will help her towards financial independence.
Divorce occurs in California as a Community Property State when two people divide all assets in half.  In some states there are other considerations.  One of my friends experienced moving to another state with her long term husband who - it took her years to realize it - was willing to lie and set the whole thing up and put in a couple years elsewhere - so he would not have to split their assets in half.  She found herself calling him to ask him to pay for her reeducation since the move meant leaving a long term job she loved and not having the retirement she would have if she stayed.  A couple years later he moved back to California and was soon married to someone who I believe was his Other Woman years before.  The focus here is on Community Property, and I've heard of wives who hire experts to track down assets they didn't know about.  But wealthy men, hear me out.  If half of all you own has always been yours, use your half for Keeping a Mistress, if you must.
To the Mistresses out there who are deeply in love with the wealthy man who Keeps them, and who have taken themselves out of the "available" pool, perhaps given up jobs or careers to be available to travel, and so on, please try not to be the Mistress Gone Mad though you are heartbroken and stressed.
You've made many decisions and choices, small and large, along the way, so own up to it.


That is All For Now!
Missy


C 2018 All Rights Reserved

IS THERE ANY CHANCE THAT A POOR GIRL CAN MARRY A RICH MAN REALLY?

Dear Missy,
Reading your blog, I feel it's like the girls growing up poor can think about becoming mistresses but can't actually marry a rich man.  The rich men want women who have their own money to marry, right?  Is there any hope for us poor girls?

Cindy

Dear Cindy,
Yes.  Of Course!
But consider that...
A poor girl can be beautiful without trying to be but she may need help choosing the right clothes, cosmetics and hair style.  She can be very intelligent but needs education to become well rounded and an expert at something.  She can be sweet, kind, a nice person, but she needs to develop her understanding of etiquette and manners.  She may have a better chance today than ever before to make it into the moneyed classes without prejudice.  Often she has to start over in a new or bigger city to begin.  Small towns don't seem to offer much opportunity.
It's better to do these things for yourself, have your own individuality and work you are good at and enjoy, before you meet a man, or else you might find yourself with one who dictates to you, who creates a woman as he wants her to be. Some women consider such a man to be a control freak and they grow up and rebel by escaping him.

Also, you do not have to become someone's mistress or someone's wife or be in a relationship at all if you have made choices for yourself to become independent.  I will stop short at saying that everything is choice because that isn't true and never was.  It's a good idea to know where you'd like to go though.
Remember that very few are born into wealth or live on inherited wealth their entire lives.
Missy

SHE CAN'T MOVE IN BECAUSE HIS MILLENIAL CHILDREN WON'T MOVE OUT (and HE WON'T MAKE THEM) : QUESTION FOR MISSY

Question:


Hi Missy,

I'm a hardworking woman in her mid forties who put herself through higher education, earned a Master's degree, and make a decent salary.  Bart is fifteen years older than me and has two Millennial children he had late in life and who he sent to college.  They went away to school, graduated, started careers, and moved back in.  I love Bart but there is no progress in our relationship.  He won't move in with me in my much smaller house.  He won't tell his children they really need to get moving and live as adults on their own.  We need the room for our relationship.  Bart's wife died a few years before I met him.

I think of myself as a Mistress sort of because though I make decent money, he provides the extras that make life exciting and truly well lived.  I've never tried to replace his wife as the mother of his children.  They seem to like me well enough.  What's with this Millennial generation?  What should I do?


Sandy
Michigan


ANSWER BY MISSY:


Hi Sandy!

The cost of living is a factor and so is that, just as you have the extras that make life exciting and truly well lived because of Bart's generous nature, so do his children. (And that cost of living and need to pay for a college education is one of the reason some Millennial's become Mistresses!) I feel sorry for the generation that remains dependent on parents though intelligent and well educated and at the start of careers because they cannot afford to move out due to the cost of living. I truly believe that the experience of independent living is important for everyone, especially before marriage. But I bet these children can afford to move out and live on their own, at least with housemates, and just do not want to for other reasons too, such as remaining family though their mom is gone.  If Bart is truly wealthy, I think it would be a good idea if he bought them a house they can live in separate of him as their inheritance, or left the house that he raised them in with his wife to them and bought a separate house for the two of you.

So I do wonder if Bart really wants to move his relationship forward into living together or legal marriage at this time or not.  It sounds like you've talked about it and are frustrated with him.
I also wonder about your house. Is it the place that you two spend most of your time?  Have sex? Depending on your own financial situation, you might want to talk to Bart about selling it and buying a home together, though I generally think such a house should be purchased by a couple only after legal marriage, or if meant to be the residence of the Mistress, put in her name only.

By the way, Millennials not moving out and into fully independent lives, and parents who allow this also keep couples who might want to divorce married.  Any man who wants a mistress and still has healthy, educated, adult children at home, has a special obstacle to that goal.


Missy

SHOULD YOU OUT YOUR EX ON THE INTERNET? WILL IT FEEL GOOD?

A friend of mine, Lorna, is furious with a man she was seeing, because he cheated on her.  She's in pain and not in a philosophical mode. 
She pointed out to me that there are a number of opportunities to "out" a bad man on the internet.  She gave me a list that includes LemonDate.com, The Dick List, Cheater News, and DontDateHimGirl.

I said "Don't do it!"

I actually don't think it's a very good idea to out anyone on the Internet.  Ultimately it will only feel good for a short while.  It's not therapy.  And it's actually not fair because Internet is the world, not just your town.  You may think that you're warning other women away, and you can certainly do that among your friends and local social group, who maybe should have warned YOU in the first place.  But you are also putting your personal business out there too.  Lorna if she does this, may come off to some people as a woman who is so pro-women that she doesn't want anyone to get involved with her ex, but is also advertising herself as the kind of woman who goes out with losers and cheats. I hate to say it, but losers and cheats seem to know one another.
Who is to be believed?

Anyone who has been the victim of mean spirited gossip knows that sometimes people lie, or at least exaggerate.  For instance, a typical mean thing that some men do is claim to others that they "had" you, when they didn't, not even close.  These men are not well in the mind but they manage to stop other men from asking you out. 

I'm not sure I understand Internet dating or clubs.  I think you should go out there and meet people in person.

When the Yahoo scandal broke - years after it should have - I got notifications on my Yahoo accounts, much older than my Google accounts, that I had reason to worry.  One account was deluged with dating clubs which appeared to be of Chinese origin.  Another account, I learned someone had signed me up for Vietnamese girls, cute, sexy, and looking for American men, and marriage. (OK, maybe they thought I needed to include these girls on my blog as mistresses?)  I feel sorry for girls who have to offer themselves this way.  As for the Chinese dating clubs, they sure weren't going to get a date with me first of all since I'm all the way in the United States but also, I'm not looking! 

There is another reason why I don't advise you out someone as a "cheat."

When I was growing up almost every adult I knew was partnered.  I didn't even think of certain relatives of mine as individuals.  How you went from being a barely pubescent kid to one of those adults who was partnered was mysterious, this thing called love.  Every year I got older and realized how much more complicated life really is.  There are a lot of assumptions about partnering, such as that if it's "True Love," then the partners are never tempted or explorative.  Whatever satisfied them when they first got together will satisfy them for life - or even eternity!  In truth, long term couples go through a lot of changes in their relationships through the years.  We are amazed at the couple that make it fifty years without ever finding someone outside their marriage of interest.

When you are not even married, these days there are so very many kinds of relationships to (hopefully) choose, that I'm not sure the way things were supposed to work is how they do!
Does virginity count?  Yes, to far fewer than it used to.  Is a first marriage simply a "starter marriage," and a divorce a rite of passage?  What about all the people who prefer not to be monogamous or who are, but one person at a time?

If you feel very strongly that you not be "cheated" upon at this time in your life, you must talk to your potential partner, and say that, and you must agree to be in the relationship where that is not allowed or split up!  Lorna is a beautiful woman but one who gives her heart without knowing if she's being given one back.  She had no agreement to be with Larry exclusively and he knew that and did what he did.

All names changed.

C 2017 Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot  All Rights Reserved.

HOW AMERICA LOST ITS SECRETS by EDWARD JAY EPSTEIN : MISTRESS MANIFESTO BOOK REVIEW

There are thousands of news articles to read around Edward Snowden, as well as a documentary film, CitizenFour, and a fictive, Oliver Stone produced film, Snowden, to watch, to form an opinion of Snowden, and what he and our United States government did.  I've been following the EDWARD SNOWDEN STORY for years, since I first heard this American was in a Moscow airport bolt hole, along with Sarah Harrison of Wikileaks, who was instrumental in getting him to Russia.  But maybe he knew he was heading there all along.

When I went looking for a well researched book to read to try and understand more, the librarian suggested this one, as Edward Jay Epstein in a respected journalist and author.  This is investigative journalism, and it's persuasive:  Edward Snowden does fit the definition of Spy, as we generally, and certainly our government has, not just in this case, but historically.  His activities to steal information and expose it, and his way to Russia, all of it, did not happen nilly willy.  It was a concentrated, possibly orchestrated (by Russia) effort, and he planned it and he knew what he was doing.

Check out this article by Glenn Greenwald on website theintercept.com entitled WHY HAS TRUST IN MEDIA COLLAPSED? Dated March 30, 2017, goes against Epstein, as he is one of those who made a case for Snowden's spy status by bringing up what I'll call "Snowden's Missing in Hong Kong days."  https://theintercept.com/2017/03/30/why-has-trust-in-media-collapsed-look-at-wjs-yahoo-business-insider-and-slate/

An excerpt:  Greenwald wrote, "Contrary to the fable these outlets dispensed to their readers — that Snowden did not check in to the Mira Hotel on May 21 as he claimed but only did so on June 1, 11 days later — these new documents, obtained from the Mira, prove that Snowden arrived there exactly when he always said, rendering their published stories factually false"  Greenwald goes on to say that Edward Jay Epstein used this incorrect information as a "linchpin" in his book, "How America Lost It's Secrets."

I do not agree with Greenwald that "Snowden's Missing in Hong Kong days," are the linchpin of proof that he is a spy or that this error is what Epsteins book relies on as proof that Snowden is a spy for Russia (or possibly China.)  No Epstein really does slowly and factually build a case, and like the film maker Oliver Stone, he did a lot of interviewing and talking to experts.  I conclude that while Snowden says he wants to return to the U.S. if he is guaranteed a fair trial, a fair trial would have to include much of what Epstein has brought forth.
Since this book is a page turner and I can't reference the whole thing in a blog post, I'll just go over some of the important information.

- Sarah Harrison of Wikileaks, created the flight to Cuba that journalists tried to get on to follow the story (and many other flights booked at the same time) to create confusion and a diversion.
- When the plane they were on landed in Russia, where Snowden should not have been allowed in without a Visa, officials met the plane, took them off it before other passengers  could deplane, and knew to receive them and where to hide them.  While in Hong Kong he'd talked to some Russian officials.  He did not apply for Visas to other countries while there.
- He methodically and intelligently planned his employment to access what he wanted to steal.
- In Chapter 16, "The Question of When,"  and Chapter 15, "Did Snowden Act Alone?" we learn that he had to have gotten the passwords to up to 24 vaults that he could not have in his previous - pre NSA - employment which suggests that he may have not been alone in all this.  At least one other person could have been in the plot, but it seems Snowden was going to be the guy to take the solo public blame. Was he recruited by the KGB based on the fact that he was a disgruntled employee?
- In Chapter 13, we learn that Snowden stole over 900,000 military files, and that the vast majority of the documents he had, which would make him valuable to our enemies,  do not involve domestic surveillance of ordinary people who are not criminal or terrorists.
- Snowden has a history of lying about his employment, reasons for being let go, and his income and has used health issues that were made up, since his brief stay in the military.  He also mislead - manipulated the journalists he selected to tell his story, using journalism as public relations.
WHERE DOES THIS LEAVE LINDSAY MILLS?  Edward Jay Epstein doesn't say it but I will. Most likely he isn't so compartmentalized as to be honest with her.

READING e-BOOKS for MISTRESS MANIFESTO BLOGSPOT

Hello Readers!

In December 2016 I finally decided to try reading by e-book.  Basically, I've always been a book lover - a book worm - and one who uses libraries, goes to books sales and bookstores and book fairs. I always seems to have two or three books to read at a time.  For this blog I like to read at least one well regarded book before choosing my subject matter such as the Mistress of the Month but sometimes I read books that I reject or two or three or four.  I also read magazine articles and news on line, including some old archived articles.  Then I'm ready to make a decision and take a position. 

I've learned over the last few months that there are some true positives for reading by e-book.  One is saving me time, though I still do visit my library and read paper.  I check to see if a book I want to read is available as an e-book and sometimes after a chapter or so I decide the books isn't appealing and that saves me borrowing or buying it.  Another is that I can use the search in Overdrive(my app) to scan the book before I read it to see if there is much reference to the person or subject that I want to learn about.  For instance, more than one mistress featured at MISTRESS MANIFESTO BLOGSPOT has so been in the shadows that you might have to read a few books to find a mention of her name.  I know I can count on the book being mine to read for 21 days reading an e - sometimes renewable several times - before I can take notes.  I still take notes by hand - sometimes hundreds of pages.  I go back to the bookmarked pages when I'm taking notes to see if I still feel the information on those pages is relevant.

Of course books are the work of writers - authors - and really when I reference a book that's more than a year or two old it's like revaluing the work.  I look at this blog as a way to introduce my readers to many of these talented, skilled, ambitious, and determined people who have managed to produce an entire manuscript, market it, get agents, get PR, and then - some of them - do that again.  As I understand it, the initial push to market a book is when they make it or break it financially.
If there is a mistress you know about that you think would make a good subject, please leave a comment.  Any books you'd recommend?  That too!

As part of the Google Blogger there are stats.  I look at these once in a while and see that many people are reading MISTRESS MANIFESTO BLOGSPOT on their cell phone. Although some of the most popular posts have "legs of their own" and so take dominance when you use the Internet to find the blog or information about someone of interest to you, I encourage you to seek a bit further, read another month, use the archives to see who else might interest you, because truly, many hours are put into each and every subject!

Thanks for reading!
Missy

HUGH HEFNER CELEBRATES HIS 91ST BIRTHDAY - NOT ALL PLAYBOY BUNNIES HAVE HIM ON THEIR SHIT LIST!

USMAGAZINE - HEFNER 9st BED and NEW DOCUSERIES
EXCERPT: The revolutionary magazine, which debuted in 1953, has gone through many changes in the past 63 years. This past February, Hugh Hefner’s son Cooper, 25, who serves as Playboy’s chief creative officer, announced that the magazine would bring back nude models after instating a short-lived ban. "I'll be the first to admit that the way in which the magazine portrayed nudity was dated but removing it entirely was a mistake,” Cooper explained. "Nudity was never the problem because nudity isn't a problem. Today we're taking our identity back and reclaiming who we are.”


Missy here:  Not every Playboy Model or Playboy Bunny has regrets.  Notably, Pamela Anderson seems quite happy with what Hugh Hefner did for her - a start as an actress and model. In my Opinion, while it's important to hone your beauty, when a woman is best known for it, especially when she models nude, she may have a difficult time being taken seriously.

END OF THE YEAR THOUGHTS ON MISTRESSES and the UPCOMMING DONALD TRUMP PRESIDENCY

Donald Trump is our next President of the United States, our 45th.  I've read around this past years election like no other election year, was not a Trump supporter, and have some serious concerns about what will happen when he and the Republican conservatives he will surround himself with, will do about women's issues, such as the right to get contraception, Choose abortion (which should be affordable), and so much else.

To stay on topic though, let me say that his appeal is in his promise of a new prosperity for the United States, something that I'm all for.  However, I'm not sure if to Republicans this means not only FULL EMPLOYMENT but LIVABLE COST OF LIVING WAGES.

Several people I know who have college educations and once had nice careers have been unemployed for years and are only eating enough because they get SNAP (Food Stamp) benefits.  I suspect that during Trumps administration, this thrice married man and alleged womanizer and sexist (who is a feminist when it comes to his daughters and their education, careers, and businesses), will, with the help of the conservative cast he has assembled around him, manage to create conditions in which there will be more mistresses than ever. And I'm convinced that if ever the truth could be revealed we'd find more Republicans have mistresses than Democrats!

These mistresses won't all be involved with married men but they will be Kept just the same, perhaps not in the Classic Mistress manner, but Kept.  Busy and wealthy,  the men who keep mistresses will delight in having a person and place to come home to that is an escape from all that Washington.

As we enter into renewed prosperity, if the business men who dominate his cabinet reinforce sexism in the workplace and in life in general, the men's income will go up, and women's will go down, creating a perfect scenario for women needing some financial help, some to survive.

May I suggest that in an attempt to deal with these conditions, more women than ever will leave men who do not make good incomes and more women than ever will go back to traditional dating rituals, such as remaining virgins until marriage or celibate between committed, serious, marriage prone relationships, expecting men to ask them out, make all the arrangements and pay for the dates?

You see, some people, including The Rules for Dating Girls, Ellen and Sherry, have long believed that when it comes to romance, it is only right to let gender considerations determine who does what, such as who is the pursuer. If a man cannot afford to impress a woman with his personality, manners, education, income, and potential to rise in life, he cannot date at all.

One of the many benefits of the feminist movement for men is women taking some responsibility for these traditional male roles.

When a man is a millionaire or billionaire (remember Trump's promise to reveal his tax returns?), he can afford a harem, which is what a man like Trump would do if he were in say, Saudi Arabia.  Here in the U.S.A, we expect people to divorce a spouse rather than keep him or her around when things aren't going well.  Trump has Ivana, Marla, and now Melania, all tied to him by children. It's as harem as it's going to get for the U.S.A.
However, it used to be that a divorced man could not expect to win the White House. The American public has wanted married men who stay married and seem to love their one wife and families as their President.  As such, Presidents who did womanize or have affairs or mistresses, kept their wives.

I wish the Clintons had been able to say, "We are dedicated to staying married, but we have an agreement that we can fool around."  That certainly seems to have been the case. I think it hurt Hillary Clinton that she stayed with her cheating husband after they left the White House. The woman has been called a lesbian, hated, cold, and a number of other adjectives that dismiss that she's worked hard in her professional life to make good things happen for average people. Yet it seems the era of the Clintons is over.

At the end of four years I think President Trump will be humbled and the country will be geared up for a revolution that ends the Republicans for good.  Other parties will begin to form and stand on different, more reality-based platforms.

Yours,
Missy

INCOME INEQUITY - BY STATE - WOMEN ARE STILL MAKING LESS THAN MEN : MEN SHOULD PAY FOR DATES! OPINION BY MISSY

AAUW - SIMPLE TRUTH ABOUT THE GENDER PAY GAP


In Wyoming women make 64 cents to every $1.00 men do...

In California women make a 86 cents...

I was raised to let men do the asking, planning, and paying for dates.

I came to feel it was wrong not to "contribute," such as for desert or leaving a tip or maybe paying for cab fare.

But in recent years, as I heard that some men even ask a woman out and then, on the date, announce that she is paying her own way or paying for the whole thing, which is appallingly bad manners for starters, I came to feel that while every relationship is different, men who can't afford to date shouldn't. (And there are lots of things to do for free or inexpensively in the big city so whoever is asking another person out does have some options.)

Are some men taking advantage of women, treating them as financial equals when they are not?  I think so.

Men who are satisfied with feminism only because they're lazy about taking the old responsibilities when dating and in relationships seem to be all over.

I've recently met several men, as neighbors and friends of friends, who are living with their much more financially successful girlfriends and letting them pay all the rent and more!  I can't help but think that the day will come when that girlfriend has had enough and asks them to go.  Some of these men are in school or working full time and maybe the day will come when they are the ones who can do it all and let their girlfriends be the ones who are supported.

Maybe I've come full circle...  HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THIS ISSUE?

PROFESSOR XIE ZOUSHI SUGGESTS POOR CHINESE MEN SHOULD SHARE A WIFE?! MISSY HAS SOME STRONG OPINIONS!

DAILY MAIL - CHINESE MEN SHOULD SHARE A WIFE?

(check out my previous posts on CHINESE MISTRESSES!  Use the search feature embedded in the side bar to search within this blog using the word China, or for September 2015  Chinese Empress Dowager Cixi, or for January of 2011, Chinese concubines and Mistresses!)

EXCERPT:

A Chinese economics professor has made the daring suggestion that China's poorest bachelors should group together and share a wife.

 

Xie Zuoshi, a professor at Zhejiang University of Finance in eastern China, made the proposal in a post on his personal blog reported People's Daily Online.
 

The post was in response to the recently unveiled statistics that predicted China will have 30 million more men than women by 2020...

MISSY'S OPINION!

 



China's one child policy, which resulted in MILLIONS of female fetuses being aborted in favor of having just one SON, this incredible and horrible sexism in Chinese culture (which used to be played out by forms of infanticide such as throwing female babies down wells or smothered to death simply because it used to be that the FIRST CHILD had to be a SON) has now resulted in about 30 MILLION MEN who have no choice of brides.  Possibly this is an economic problem only, but not probably.  Where there are so fewer WOMEN, women do have a greater choice of men. 

But a friend who once moved to ALASKA because she was so very tall, though beautiful, that she was not being asked on dates, came back to America and said, "There are men in Alaska but the problem is that Alaska is in the men..." 

I suspect that  while CHINESE WOMEN can be pickier than perhaps ever before, choosing a husband isn't only about money but also CLASS and TRADITION, such as parents doing the matchmaking, as well as issues such as PHYSICAL APPEARANCE and DISABILITY, and LOCATION, factoring in.

Maybe the Professor was being practical, but the article doesn't seem to mention what he thought WOMEN might think about HAVING TWO HUSBANDS in CHINESE CULTURE.  It's true that there have been some cultures in which a woman had two or even many husbands AT THE SAME TIME, all living together or close by, but I've taken the anthropology class; most often these men are BROTHERS and basically, she does NOT have to sexually satisfy ALL OF THEM.  Instead, the genetic and economic issue means that the brothers total a smaller number of children to support though this shared wife, because the WIFE is very much stuck at home doing FEMALE SPECIFIC work.  And if you sleep with a bunch of brothers, maybe none of them are going to know for sure that they are or are not the father of a certain child.

Also, American men are IMPORTING CHINESE WOMEN AS BRIDES to live here with them and become U.S. Citizens and wealthy Chinese women are also coming right here to HAVE 2nd and 3rd children!  (I recently saw a group of them being given a tour of a garden together, with one man who spoke some English as the guide.  How rare to see a bevy of young Chinese beauties, all seven or more months pregnant, sans wedding bands, walking through the garden!)  I've previously read that Chinese men are importing South Korean women to marry.

So if you happen to be a CHINESE MAN WITHOUT ANY PROSPECTS FOR MARRIAGE (or if you happen to be Professor Xie Zoushi), may I suggest that some people will have to LEAVE CHINA to marry? As in the history of the United States, a starting point is to find Cousins here in the U.S. to sponsor you!  Further, you may have to give up on the idea of marrying another person who appears Asian!  As there is a surplus of women all over the world who want to be married and who are attracted to men outside their own race or ethnicity, this is also a possibility. 

And, of course, some of you never married Chinese men, actually will prefer to remain unmarried, but have one or many Mistresses through your life time!  Just like the old Emperors!

Missy

 

STUDY SUGGESTS WOMEN BEING BISEXUAL IS BETTER FOR POLYGAMY

DAILY MAIL - FEMALE SEXUAL FLUIDITY REDUCES CONFLICT - MEN WITH MULTIPLE WIVES  by Cheyenne Macdonald For Dailymail.com

EXCERPT:  About the scientific opinion of Dr. Satoshi Kanazawa, Evolutionary psychologist.

The analysis revealed that women are more fluid in all of the proposed facets. 

And, the study confirmed his predictions, including one which proposed that women who experience increased levels of sexual fluidity have a larger number of children, and that women who experience marriage or parenthood early in adult life also experience increased levels of sexual fluidity.

 

The researcher says this suggests that women’s sexual fluidity may have been evolutionarily selected as one method for facilitating polygynous marriages, in which a husband can have more than one wife.

 

‘Even though humans have been mildly polygynous throughout evolutionary history, polygynous marriages are often characterized by conflict and tension among co-wives,’ Kanazawa writes.

 

‘I propose that occasional sex among cowives may have reduced such conflict and tension, and increased their reproductive success. Female sexual fluidity may have evolved as an adaptation to facilitate it.‘

 

The researcher also acknowledges earlier research which explains that historically, women left their homes in order to marry, while boys stayed in their natal groups for their whole lives.

 

OPINION from MISSY

 

Don't you just LOVE it when they call all the women who are sharing a man WIVES... 

I'd like to know more about this study.  For instance, did all the WOMEN who were sharing a man, live with him or even KNOW they were sharing him?  Don't you just LOVE it that they call bisexuality or POLYAMORY "fluidity?"

JERRY HALL and RUPERT MURDOCK ARE ENGAGED TO BE MARRIED!

MARCH 2016 UPDATE - the wedding! DAILY MAIL UK - RUPERT AND JERRY MARRIED!
Thought this was the best coverage I've seen on the wedding and the blissful couple!  Missy

APRIL 2011  JERRY HALL was our MISTRESS ? OF THE MONTH.

Jerry Hall was a top model before she entered into a 20-22 year relationship with Rolling Stone lead singer, the sexaholic Mick Jagger, and she wanted to be married to him, but Mick and she had a wedding that he got away with claiming as invalid.  The couple had four children, the youngest now 18 years old, and in my opinion Mick was very cheap with her considering his vast wealth when they split.  Turns out that the house she has lived in since must be returned to Mick if she marries again.

So move on out Jerry, because media mogel Rupert Murdock makes Mick's wealth look like that of a newspaper stand operator.  (And we all know that Jerry is not greedy.) I read the news in DAILYMAIL uk, and there are many other media covering the news, some snidely, but I say MORE POWER TO YA Jerry.

Those of you reading this, don't be so sure you know what's behind the relationship.  The announcement in the Times listed the names of all their children, and you see, the first thing they have in common is a whole lotta offspring.  Secondly, Jerry makes for an attractive and fun companion. 

IS 18 TOO YOUNG TO BE A MISTRESS? OR SHOULD SHE GO TO COLLEGE ON HER OWN DIME?

QUESTION FOR MISSY

Hey Missy!
I just turned 18.   Am I old enough to be a mistress?  I met someone who wants me.  He says he'll put me through college.  My mom can't afford it.

Jenny
San Diego

ANSWER FROM MISSY

You're "legal" Jenny.  Should I say "just barely?"

There are lots of college students who are making it through with ways and means besides trust funds and parental contributions.  There are always student loans (but many go unpaid.)  There are also in California the much less expensive community colleges where you go for a couple years picking up credits, get an Associates Degree, and transfer from there, with lots of students getting grants, scholarships, working and going to school part time.  I think this is a better idea that going to any technical or specialty college.

There are also students going to the UC's who are working as strippers and exotic dancers and legal but sexual masseuses (which seems to lead to prostitution and porn but not always).  There are some students who have a Sugar Mamma or Daddy who pays all of their expenses including housing, or help as they can afford to.

But few.  All those ads in the back of free newspapers?  Ignore them.  Sadly what's for sale there is usually girls who had to run away from home and are homeless and abused.

So since going to college does not depend on having a mom who can afford it or rich parents and there are ways to go that don't require being someone's Mistress, let's go to the question of OLD ENOUGH.

My feeling is that 18 is way too young.  My feeling is that a woman should not even consider being a Mistress until she's at least 28 years old!  I know it can be argued that age is "just a number" and it's experience that counts.

WHAT KIND OF EXPERIENCES DO YOU HOPE TO HAVE IN THE NEXT 10 YEARS?

I choose 28 because by that age most people have already had some sexual experience and a good idea of their orientation.  The stats say that by then most have married.  Most have supported themselves for a while.  I don't believe anyone should marry until they have lived on their own and been self supporting for at least a year.  Better, with a realistic sense that if they ever have to, they can make it on their own.  By 28 some of your girlfriends will have married and divorced and be single mothers.

Finally, 28 is about when many women start to get the sense that there aren't too many men out there to choose from.  That sense is actually correct but remember that statistics do not predict what will happen to you in particular.  By 28 a certain percentage of men will be sure they are gay so they are not for you!  Many are happily committed in marriage or living with someone they will eventually marry.  If they are happy, then they are not for you!   If they are happy they won't do more than worship you from afar. No one ever said that getting married means you will never ever feel attracted to someone other than your mate!

Then there are the men who are not attracted to you and never will be, even if you are attracted to them.  Again, not for you!  It seems that men count on their attraction to a woman in their choices much more than women.  Still, because of Internet dating sights, even those over 50 are finding someone to be with that they wouldn't normally meet in the course of life.

So I think "give it ten years and see what happens."

From 18 to 28 you will have lived a lot of life, know more - especially about yourself, be more mature, and you can think about what's happened so far in your life and reassess.

I suggest you go to your closest community college.  Explain your situation.  Talk to their Career Counselors and Financial Aid.  Take some tests to assess your interests and abilities. Even if you try it out with just one class this fall, why not try it, even if you work at a fast food restaurant too!  And Jenny, I thought your question was important enough to run my answer here in plenty of time for you to get it together for the fall semester.

Missy

BOB HOPE : SO MANY WOMEN SO LITTLE TIME - WHO WAS HIS MISTRESS? SANDY VINGER FOR ONE

 

Simon and Shuster HOPE BOOK Richard Zoglin Video Interview

 

Bob Hope in what appears to be midlife. 

He lived to be over 100 years old. 

Photos of him as a young man are indeed handsome

and one thing that never faded was his smile.

Back in May of 2009 I wrote a post titled "BOB HOPE'S GIRLFRIENDS."  That post got near 3000 hits by July of this year, and I knew this was a topic my readers were eager for.  Back in 2009 I read one book about Hope by Arthur Marx and in 2015 I've finally read Richard Zoglin's new book (above) about Bob Hope.   

I'm not sure if the woman my friend told me about, who lived in walking distance of the Hope's house, is in either book...  I know some of you were hoping I would identify her.  I tried!  It's possible that there was more than one woman living in walking distance from the Toluca Lake home that Hope kept over the years.  Marx reported that Hope had a brother who delivered cash money to various women for their rent.  However, I have a suspicion that the woman was Sandy Vinger, the woman Zoglin identifies as his "last girlfriend" in the 1980's when he was in his 70's, who sued Hope due to promises that he would support her for life. The case was settled out of court in 1994 and Vinger is, well, probably keeping her part of the bargain in not discussing it.  (Didn't I once say that the best Mistresses are the one's you don't hear about?)

Read more: DAILY MAIL - ARTICLE ON BOB HOPES AFFAIR WITH A BEAUTY QUEEN   (This article is a good summation of the contents of Zoglin's book.  Doris Day by the way denies she ever had an affair with Hope.)

Image from Google Images

Be it Zoglin's book or Marx's (and Zoglin disses Marx's book), there is no doubt that Bob Hope was not faithful to his wife Dolores during the 69 years of their marriage but she certainly outlasted and outlived most of her competition - and Bob.  They are buried side by side at the Mission San Fernando Rey De Espana cemetery in the San Fernando Valley of Los Angeles County.

Bob was certainly loyal to her and she him. 

Here at Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot we're not so interested in flings, affairs, sexting, hook-ups, "Friends with Benefits," or "Relationships" that are NOT Relationships. We're in the process of defining the word (or label) "Mistress," which I think is incorrectly overused to identify any woman who has an affair with a married man.

So if a star, be it a rock star, or a man who started out in vaudeville like Bob, a man who travels for work, in this case an outstanding career in entertainment, is entertained along the way by even hundreds of women over time, be they groupies or show girls, well, that may be sex, it may be fun, it may be cheating, but it's not the same as that man having a Mistress. 

A Mistress is a Relationship!

My opinion is that if Bob Hope had been born in 1983 instead of 1903, he would be diagnosed today as a hyperactive adult and a sex addict, perhaps even a risk addict.  But maybe all that psychology talk is worthless.  For a high school drop out, who was called "Hopeless" by the other street urchins, who even spent some time in a boy's Reformatory for shoplifting, possibly because of the poverty of his immigrant family home, he certainly learned as he went and turned out to be a superb businessman who became wealthy with investments in undeveloped land.  His career included radio, television, movies, the stage, traveling shows to entertain American troops, hosting the Academy Awards, and accepting very many Honorary Doctorates!

Bob Hope is one man who could have said, "half of success is showing up."   HE SHOWED UP and kept doing so in his senior years.  His schedule would have put most people in their graves years younger than his 100, so I have to ask "WHEN DID HE HAVE THE TIME TO FIT SO MANY WOMEN INTO HIS LIFE?  How much of it, be it via Marx or Zoglin, is even true, granted some of the people who talked a lot to these authors were working with or near Hope?  Bob himself was not one to get too personal with reporters or book authors.

A comparison between the Marx book and the Zoglin book would be that Zoglin is writing years later and at a time when far fewer people alive have a memory of Bob Hope as an comedian who is credited with having invented stand up comedy.  For the reader who is unfamiliar with Hope's sense of humor, I appreciated that Zoglin included some of his lines and his act as the story went so you get a feel for the man as an entertainer   Hope was considered to be a naturally funny man, a positive high energy person who kept things professional by avoiding discussions of too personal issues with clever quips, but someone who acted as a gentleman and happily engaged with his fans wherever he went.  Would not that personality and outlook on life be appealing to women?

Dolores, I suspect, was a whole lot like Bob's mother, Avis, who kept the grim reality of their existence bright with an immaculate house, welcomed guests, and by singing and playing the piano.

Although these days the term "denial" is applied to people such as Avis and Bob and Dolores, I challenge that.  Lots of people have come to terms with how life was or is and acknowledge that; you don't have to live in the past or confess all your private business so people won't think you're in denial!  What is the point if you're going forth and living each day to the fullest?  It takes strength and courage and a commitment to go on at times.

Bob, and all his brothers, had to start supporting themselves and contributing to the family young.  And when Bob met Dolores, he met a young woman whose father had died when she was sixteen who had also quit school and worked to support her family, as a fashion model, as a Broadway Chorus girl who appeared in a 1929 Ziegfeld musical in the chorus line, and as a singer.

That's right.  Dolores Hope was once a showgirl and had a show business career!

Bob pursued her madly.  But Zoglin presents a mystery that all you genealogy buffs can work on.  It seems that Bob and Dolores privately hid his first marriage and divorce and there is no record (yet found) of their marriage, though wedding guest Milton Berle remembered a church wedding in New York about a year after they met.  In the previous pre-digital era, there were so many burned up and thrown away paper archives I think it's going too far to say that the actually never married.

While it seems that Bob Hope, his employees, reporters and media, in general, may have kept secrets from the public and his wife, I wonder how much Dolores did or didn't know or understood. For it turns out that Bob and she were in touch with his first wife, Louise Troxell, his vaudeville circuit partner, for years!

While we feel confident that Bob Hope had lots of sex outside of his marriage, the KNOWN women who most qualify to be called his Mistress, are very few.  Sandy Vinger is one of them, and this month I'll keep poking around to identify more!


Missy

C 2015 All Rights Reserved including Internet and International Rights

BORN TO RECIEVE by AMANDA OWEN ; ARE YOU READY TO ASK FOR WHAT YOU NEED? MISTRESS MANIFESTO BOOK REVIEW

BORN TO RECIEVE
7 POWERFUL STEPS WOMEN CAN TAKE TODAY TO RECLAIM THEIR HALF OF THE UNIVERSE
by AMANDA OWEN  C 2014
Tarcher-Penguin Publisher

Missy here.
I picked up this book and started reading and it seemed just the book to pair with the month of February when we place so much importance on Valentine's Day.  Take for example The Ten Featured Skills of a Receiver.

(To paraphrase)
1) Accept a compliment graciously and be genuinely pleased to receive a gift.
2) Regularly express gratitude.
3) Have your attention on the present, not dwelling on the past or fretting about the future.
4) Be a good listener.
5) Be observant.
6) Define a "good" person as a whole person rather than someone who places other people's needs before their own.
7) Do not enable people.
8) Know when to cease activity.
9) Uses information in her environment to make decisions.
10) Don't complain.

I admit that I've struggle with some of these, but that I have gotten better at all of them through the years.

This book values feelings and suggests that you reveal them.

Further, you should not accept or condone unacceptable behavior from others because...

1) You want to keep the peace.
2) Are afraid of conflict.
3) Don't have the energy to follow through if you do bring up the issue.
4) Don't think it will do any good because you tried before.
5) Don't want to admit that you're being treated poorly.
6) Are afraid you'll loose your relationship if you stand up for yourself.
7) You're out of practice of advocating for your own needs.

AMANDA OWEN SITE ; BORN TO RECEIVE