She must have been - after all - if she's making it into THE MISTRESS OF THE MONTH HALL OF FAME here at MISTRESS MANIFESTO.BLOGSPOT.COM!
Saturday, April 30, 2016
Thursday, April 28, 2016
SHE'S HIS WIFE - CAN SHE RETRIEVE HIM FROM THE MISTRESS SHE SELECTED FOR HIM? : OPINION BY MISSY
QUESTION FOR MISSY
Dear Missy,
I'm a wife whose husband, who I'll call John, has a mistress. I did a Yoko Ono a few years ago and encouraged him towards a particular woman, Stephanie, I liked. He moved out into an apartment and she moved in with him, which I wasn't expecting.
We've never talked about getting a divorce. I didn't want an Open Relationship, I just thought that having an adventure might be what he needed for his life, and I expected him to come back to me. I was real generous, right? I needed my space too and have enjoyed it, but now I'm feeling lonely. I think I have a better perspective on our relationship and can improve on it. Now that this situation as gone on like this for a year and a half, I'm starting to regret it. Stephanie's content or at least isn't pressuring him to divorce, at least that's what he says, but I want him back. I also don't want to beg. I'm miserable. What have I done? What should I do?
Jessica
New York City
I'm a wife whose husband, who I'll call John, has a mistress. I did a Yoko Ono a few years ago and encouraged him towards a particular woman, Stephanie, I liked. He moved out into an apartment and she moved in with him, which I wasn't expecting.
We've never talked about getting a divorce. I didn't want an Open Relationship, I just thought that having an adventure might be what he needed for his life, and I expected him to come back to me. I was real generous, right? I needed my space too and have enjoyed it, but now I'm feeling lonely. I think I have a better perspective on our relationship and can improve on it. Now that this situation as gone on like this for a year and a half, I'm starting to regret it. Stephanie's content or at least isn't pressuring him to divorce, at least that's what he says, but I want him back. I also don't want to beg. I'm miserable. What have I done? What should I do?
Jessica
New York City
ANSWER FROM MISSY
Jessica,
Well, at least you own your role in creating this situation, which is an Open Relationship of sorts, and which was once satisfactory but now has you so worried. At least you and the Other Woman, of your own selection for him, know about each other. My sense is that you felt in control at the time but now realize you really are not.
If you want him back you should not hesitate now to say so as a first step in doing so.
You must talk with him openly and honestly, but that doesn't mean you are going to go into the conversation unprepared or go on and on, detailing. In fact you are going to script it and practice in the mirror before you meet. The most difficult thing to do is to keep it short and sweet, state your case, don't overrun your time together, and basically just put an option on the table and then see if he goes with it.
You have the advantage since you are not going to warn him that the reason you're going out for dinner together is to discuss your relationship. He may be stunned or it might force him to realize that he does want a divorce. Oh my.
It's time to go out to dinner or lunch - a neutral space - to have a conversation. So don't ask him to come home and make him dinner. Provide your own transportation going and coming. Pick a place where the waiters don't hover and they don't kick you out the moment you've finished your meal, preferably with intimate, low lighting and booths, or maybe one of those outdoor patios, no loud music but maybe some background, and preferably where no one you know might see you and want to listen in and then gossip. Pick a place that serves drinks; One before the conversation, unless either of you are prone to overdo it and shouldn't imbibe. Plan on being there no more than an hour and a half. Set up your scenario while appearing effortless.
Order one drink, wait until the food is served, have a few bites, and then look him in the eye and tell him the truth. These are the lines that you practice in the mirror. Something like, "John, I have something to say that may surprise you. Being somewhat separated as we are has given me time to reflect on our marriage and I've surprised myself. Without getting too much into it right now, the fact is I fear that you are more involved with Stephanie that I could have ever imagined when I urged you towards her. The fact is I want you back, and to be only mine. Will you think about it, dear?"
At this point your heart will probably be pounding, but so what, love is like that, so long as you're not crying and running your mascara!
Let him talk. If he changes the subject, don't bring it back up. Don't use this dinner to get into the entire conversation or sort it all out. Some other time. Don't end the date with your own husband asking for an answer in a certain time limit.
Wait a month before you bring it up again, if he doesn't. Then tell him you were just wondering if he's given it any thought. One of the things he's going to think about is if he should also discuss this all with Stephanie and my feeling is that they are living together and of course he should. Also, if he does decide to rejoin you in traditional marriage, Stephanie should not be cruelly abandoned. (The way John Lennon did May Pang, the mistress of the month here at MISTRESS MANIFESTO, in April of 2012.) Stephanie probably knows that you urged him towards her and now she has invested some of her life into John and may love him. He may also love her. Or both of you.
If you have money, and she does not, it would be honorable to provide her the means to move into another apartment so that she's not stuck in one with memories and if she is not working, several months of living expenses - a year would be better - while she job hunts - should be provided. If Stephanie agrees to leave the relationship, she may still have feelings for John. Be a Great Babe and do your best to help her move forward without being overly invasive. Can you give her some references to good employment? Know any good men you could introduce her to?
I know of a couple that divorced and both of them remarried within the year. To their best friends! And they are all still warm and affectionate with each other and even go out to dinner the four of them from time to time.
Missy
Jessica,
Well, at least you own your role in creating this situation, which is an Open Relationship of sorts, and which was once satisfactory but now has you so worried. At least you and the Other Woman, of your own selection for him, know about each other. My sense is that you felt in control at the time but now realize you really are not.
If you want him back you should not hesitate now to say so as a first step in doing so.
You must talk with him openly and honestly, but that doesn't mean you are going to go into the conversation unprepared or go on and on, detailing. In fact you are going to script it and practice in the mirror before you meet. The most difficult thing to do is to keep it short and sweet, state your case, don't overrun your time together, and basically just put an option on the table and then see if he goes with it.
You have the advantage since you are not going to warn him that the reason you're going out for dinner together is to discuss your relationship. He may be stunned or it might force him to realize that he does want a divorce. Oh my.
It's time to go out to dinner or lunch - a neutral space - to have a conversation. So don't ask him to come home and make him dinner. Provide your own transportation going and coming. Pick a place where the waiters don't hover and they don't kick you out the moment you've finished your meal, preferably with intimate, low lighting and booths, or maybe one of those outdoor patios, no loud music but maybe some background, and preferably where no one you know might see you and want to listen in and then gossip. Pick a place that serves drinks; One before the conversation, unless either of you are prone to overdo it and shouldn't imbibe. Plan on being there no more than an hour and a half. Set up your scenario while appearing effortless.
Order one drink, wait until the food is served, have a few bites, and then look him in the eye and tell him the truth. These are the lines that you practice in the mirror. Something like, "John, I have something to say that may surprise you. Being somewhat separated as we are has given me time to reflect on our marriage and I've surprised myself. Without getting too much into it right now, the fact is I fear that you are more involved with Stephanie that I could have ever imagined when I urged you towards her. The fact is I want you back, and to be only mine. Will you think about it, dear?"
At this point your heart will probably be pounding, but so what, love is like that, so long as you're not crying and running your mascara!
Let him talk. If he changes the subject, don't bring it back up. Don't use this dinner to get into the entire conversation or sort it all out. Some other time. Don't end the date with your own husband asking for an answer in a certain time limit.
Wait a month before you bring it up again, if he doesn't. Then tell him you were just wondering if he's given it any thought. One of the things he's going to think about is if he should also discuss this all with Stephanie and my feeling is that they are living together and of course he should. Also, if he does decide to rejoin you in traditional marriage, Stephanie should not be cruelly abandoned. (The way John Lennon did May Pang, the mistress of the month here at MISTRESS MANIFESTO, in April of 2012.) Stephanie probably knows that you urged him towards her and now she has invested some of her life into John and may love him. He may also love her. Or both of you.
If you have money, and she does not, it would be honorable to provide her the means to move into another apartment so that she's not stuck in one with memories and if she is not working, several months of living expenses - a year would be better - while she job hunts - should be provided. If Stephanie agrees to leave the relationship, she may still have feelings for John. Be a Great Babe and do your best to help her move forward without being overly invasive. Can you give her some references to good employment? Know any good men you could introduce her to?
I know of a couple that divorced and both of them remarried within the year. To their best friends! And they are all still warm and affectionate with each other and even go out to dinner the four of them from time to time.
Missy
Tuesday, April 26, 2016
HOW LONG DID YOU MISTRESS BEFORE MARRYING YOUR MAN? : MISSY ASKS YOU!
I was wondering if any of you who are reading this blog have been a mistress who married her man. If so, please leave a comment and tell us HOW LONG DID YOU WAIT TO MARRY? Was he married when you met? Did he divorce to marry you?
Saturday, April 23, 2016
WINDSOR CASTLE - THE OLDEST CASTLE CONTINUALLY OCCUPIED
image from Publicvector.org vintage public domain
Thursday, April 21, 2016
WHAT'S SO GOOD FOR CHARLES ABOUT CAMILLA? (ESPECIALLY COMPARED TO DIANA)
NOTES and EXCERPTS from Catherine Meyers' book BORN TO BE KING
In this book we learn it was mutual friend Lucia Santa Cruz who, in 1971, introduced Charles and Camilla with the jest "Now you two watch your genes because of Alice Keppel." The genes comment is because its possible they are distant cousins.
page 97
"Only Camilla has ever been able to be herself fully around the Prince because she has nothing to hide from him. Robust and cheerful, she entered the relationship free from neurosis and, ironically, from any expectation of being Queen"
page 98
"With Camilla, the Prince would eventually develop his first - and arguably, only truly adult relationship, combining love and passion, respect and equality, plus a sense of humor that often leaves both of them guffawing and weeping. Camilla is "Rude and raunchy" says actress Emma Thompson, approvingly.
Actress Emma Thompson provided information to the author of this book and is considered a personal friend of Prince Charles.
In this book we learn it was mutual friend Lucia Santa Cruz who, in 1971, introduced Charles and Camilla with the jest "Now you two watch your genes because of Alice Keppel." The genes comment is because its possible they are distant cousins.
page 97
"Only Camilla has ever been able to be herself fully around the Prince because she has nothing to hide from him. Robust and cheerful, she entered the relationship free from neurosis and, ironically, from any expectation of being Queen"
page 98
"With Camilla, the Prince would eventually develop his first - and arguably, only truly adult relationship, combining love and passion, respect and equality, plus a sense of humor that often leaves both of them guffawing and weeping. Camilla is "Rude and raunchy" says actress Emma Thompson, approvingly.
Actress Emma Thompson provided information to the author of this book and is considered a personal friend of Prince Charles.
Saturday, April 16, 2016
LION and LIONESS
She will defend her cubs and defend the Lion.
Wednesday, April 13, 2016
A GREATER LOVE by CHRISTOPHER WILSON : MISTRESS MANIFESTO BOOK REVIEW
Prince Charles and Camilla Parker Bowles
The subtitle "20 year affair" makes this book seem hopelessly dated.
The author, for instance, doubted that there would ever be a divorce. Christopher Wilson published A GREATER LOVE in 1994, when Princess Diana was still alive.
But the perfect title for what I was looking for in a book about Camilla and Charles drew me to read it anyway.
This is the portrayal of Camilla, that helped answer for me "What did he see in her?" especially when the competition, so to speak, was the famous, extremely popular, Diana, Princess of Wales.
In this book we learn that Camilla was educated at Bumbrells and then transferred to London, to the Queens Gate school in South Kensington which "provides the wives for half the Foreign Office" and was known as "Milla." She wasn't an academic, no more so than Princess Diana. Both women would be considered high school drop outs in America, but she excelled in fencing and horseback riding. In the summer of 1964 she left school and traveled to Switzerland and Paris to be "finished" with school, and made her debute to society in March 1965 when her parents had a cocktail party for her in Knightsbridge. She was seventeen years old.
When exactly did Charles and Camilla begin their mutual adultery?
Some say it was in early 1980. Camilla's husband's work took him out of the country and there was an encounter that Wilson's says is true that made the papers. At the Circencester Polo Ball, they sat at the same table, and spent the whole evening dancing with each other and French Kissing. Andrew Parker-Bowles was there to see this display of who-cares-who-sees-us affection. He was said to have remarked "HRH is very fond of my wife and she appears to be very fond of him," but was actually quite shocked. When the cat's away the mice will play...
No doubt Camilla was in on the process of Charles finding a suitable royal wife, and may have earnestly tried to advise Diana on how to handle Charles, but after some time it was Camilla who was the official hostess of social occasions.
Once the "Open Secret" of Charles and Camilla's relationship was understood, according to Wilson, both the Queen and the Queen Mother knew about it. Diana's notion that there were three people in her marriage was correct but the idea that she was completely innocent of what she was getting into is controversial. In this book we learn that Diana's mother was against the marriage, that her grandmother warned her against marrying into the royal family, that her family, after a report of a blond spending the night with Charles on a train, put Diana's virginity into question, felt the need to speak out to defend her, and that Charles had dated Diana's sister, who also had bulimia.
C Book Review/Report 2016 Missy Rapport/ Mistressmanifesto.blogspot All Rights reserved.
Monday, April 11, 2016
Saturday, April 9, 2016
APRIL 9th 2005 THE WEDDING of CAMILLA SHAND and PRINCE CHARLES - THEY WAITED 33 YEARS FOR THIS!
A second marriage for the both of them. Prince Charles married Princess Diana in 1981. She died in 1997. No doubt the opinions of a great many important and influential people, and that of the general public, were taken into account when it came to exactly when the two lovers would be allowed to marry.
The Civil Ceremony - where Charles and Camilla exchanged rings in private.
The announcer says "They waited 33 years for this." Followed by a Blessing Ceremony at
Saint George's castle.
Charles' mother Queen Elizabeth II, and his father, Prince Phillip did attend, as did his son's Princes William and Henry (Harry). Camilla's family also attended.
One wonders how it was all planned to be both meaningful and wonderful for the couple, and sensitive to others.
The Civil Ceremony - where Charles and Camilla exchanged rings in private.
The announcer says "They waited 33 years for this." Followed by a Blessing Ceremony at
Saint George's castle.
Charles' mother Queen Elizabeth II, and his father, Prince Phillip did attend, as did his son's Princes William and Henry (Harry). Camilla's family also attended.
One wonders how it was all planned to be both meaningful and wonderful for the couple, and sensitive to others.
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