ANONYMOUS DEFINED MISTRESS : MISSY ASKS YOU!

"MISTRESS : SOMETHING BETWEEN A MISTER AND A MATTRESS"
- Anonymous

I ask YOU, is this funny?  Sexist?  I discovered it while doing some research on defining mistresses.  What definition of Mistress are you comfortable with?

Missy

THE WOMEN - from the play by CLAIR BOOTHE - MISTRESS MANIFESTO BLOGSPOT CLASSIC FILM REVIEW

 Originally shown in 1939, screenwriters Anita Loos and Jane Murfin had to rewrite it to make the Broadway Play that was such a success for Clare Boothe (Clare Boothe Luce), to be acceptable to the American public.  Though dealing with the serious subject (especially for 1939, pre World War II) of divorce, Mistresses, and mothering, it was called a comedy.  Maybe the cat fight was funny.  It's in black and white - except for a rather exciting fashion show in color.  Besides the female playwright and female screenwriters, this one has an all female cast - and it's proto feminist though perhaps no one involved would have labeled themselves that way.  Joan Crawford, Rosalind Russell, and a number of other famous female stars worked ensemble.

Norma Shearer acts as Mary Haines, one of a group of Park Avenue princesses whose husband gets himself a Mistress, almost predictably, a poorer woman who has to work as a sales clerk at a store, is beautiful and quite certain he prefers her.  The Haines have one daughter, about 8, suggesting that the seven year itch has begun.  Mary is athletic, a good mother whose daughter also rides horses.  Also stereotypically, she's the last to know her husband has a Mistress, though all her girlfriends do through the gossip of their manicurist.  The Park Avenue Princess lifestyle is about fashion shows, day spas, personal trainers and upkeep, and they all want to remain married.  Mary's own mother counsels her to pretend it's not happening - just as she once did with Mary's father.  The men will be men ethos (that so many women subscribe to today) and the belief in divorce as ruining a reputation may keep the marriage intact. 

Remarkably again for the times, Mary decides her pride and independence is more important.  Progressive for her set, she decides to take the train to Reno for a quick divorce, after meeting her husband's mistress at a courtier's house where both women are buying lots of clothes that he will pay for.

In Reno there is another cast of characters, women who are also getting divorces; a wealthy woman on her fourth, and a married woman who is divorcing so she can marry another of the woman's husbands.  Instead of being a lone woman who is divorcing, here is a bunch of husband snatchers. There's the pregnant woman who is overjoyed to be wanted back and doesn't go through with it.  But Mary does.

Two years later her husband wants her back.  He sees that his Mistress does not make a good mother for their daughter.  Predictably, Mary wants him back too.  It's her motherhood that makes it so.

C 2017 Film Review Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot.

ARE YOU KEEPING SOMEONE? OR JUST HAVING AN AFFAIR? : MISSY ASKS YOU!

I think there are a lot of people who are just having affairs who are taking them way too seriously, and then there are those who advance to being Mistresses (or Mantresses) and are in serious and more committed relationships with another person.  Some of the people who are just having affairs are not also committing adultery.  And some of the Mistresses and Mantresses are being Kept by people who are not married or living with someone else in a marriage-like situation.


What's your situation?

ARE YOU KEEPING SOMEONE?  OR JUST HAVING AN AFFAIR? 

Missy


P.S. I read but don't publish all comments, and would advise you to change names or not mention them at all!  See my page Comments for more information!

COCKLE SHELL

CARLY SIMON : IT HAPPENS EVERY DAY

WARDROBE WAKEUP by LOIS JOY JOHNSON : MISTRESS MANIFESTO BOOK REVIEW

DO YOU WANT TO APPEAR AGELESS?

What does it mean to be a "woman of a certain age," especially because we're living into our eighties now? Well, this book focuses on age 40 plus and the realities of aging on the human body. Fat redistributes giving you a tummy. Your breasts may get fuller or sag. You may or may not have money to spend on designer clothing and accessories, cosmetic surgery, or other alternatives to being mysterious about your age.

This book does have some assumptions. For instance Lois Joy Johnson, the author, and many of the models and opinion-givers photographed here are rather thin women. Or their weight gain isn't substantial looking. So I didn't see a model in the book who appeared to be "plus sized" or fat.

And while the book says it's a good thing to "cross-shop" and buy some things cheap but upgrade the entire look with more expensive accessories, overall, the author is speaking to the woman who has a closet full of clothes, some that were expensive, who needs to do some self evaluation about how she currently looks in the clothes she already has.
There are  some things I disagree with Lois Joy Johnson on, so let me get those out of the way.
The nude or flesh colored shoe, particularily a heel, elongating the look of a leg because it matches the flesh; I think this is a fashion look that's now dated. I don't think you can really fool anyone that you've grown a few inches wearing a "nude" shoe color - and I dislike shoes that seem not to match the color(s) of any of the clothing you're wearing.  You won't find any "nude" shoes or purses in my closet.
While wearing monotone clothing, or wearing V necks may elongate the look for photography, when I'm out and about and I see a woman wearing monotone or V necks, I'm not fooled that she's taller.  I may think though that she has conscientiously put together her look.

Secondly, I dislike the reliance on form shaping underwear. There is an old fashioned word for form shaping underwear - "foundations."  Maybe today's are better because they are made with miracle fibers but they are still "girdles" to hold in the tummy - slightly.  I recall as a child coming in contact with a horrible rubber one that a relative of mine had in her drawer for emergencies and that "ewe what is that!?" feeling as I pulled it out and stretched it. I agree with her that a good bra that actually fits is a necessity and that you need to be refitted frequently but most women I know try to avoid wearing them because they can be painful. Many women prefer camis and only wear a bra when they must!   I do believe such underwear can sort of smooth your shape, but it's also usually extrememly hot, even clammy, to wear. Better some exercise or diet and 100% cotton against your private parts!

Now, if I didn't think this was a very good book and worth your reading time, I wouldn't even post it here at MISTRESS MANIFESTO BLOGSPOT! I think the advice in this book is for anyone who wants to have a decent basic wardrobe, regardless of age, if you want the basis of that wardrobe to be classics, fine tailoring to fit (or refit) your clothing (a tailor is essential to add life to those items that you paid a lot of money for back when the shoulder pads were in), and learning how to appear modern not matronly.

Here are some of this fashion-insider/author's best advisements:  
Update your eye glasses every year - they are jewelry for your face.

Buy white t-shirts and underwear cheap because no matter what you do, they will loose that fresh white look from laundering. Buying dresses is usually overall a better idea than skirts and matching tops, because dresses can hide your body better, especially if you pay attention to the pattern, which should be swirly or floral. 

Your posture is extremely important, as is your energy and your smile.
Check out the many web sites that Johnson refers you to, and you'll be more educated about fashion and what's right for you, and might even influence today's designers who are also looking at these sites, trying to adapt to what women really think and want to buy!

To me 40 is too young to give up on some of the clothing that is suggested you be done with.  Instead, I ask "What is your physical shape and good attributes and where are you going?"  If you have great legs, I see no reason you have to have your skirts and dresses near the knee, not on you day off, or when you're going to a seaside resort, not even if you're 60.  You may want to think of animal prints in natural colors staid, when you have Zebra rainbow colors to wear with your jeans unless that's too matchy-matchy with your daughter!  And maybe your complexion is such that you really can still wear girly-girl pink and not look like one of those little old ladies with round marks of blush.
You too should read any fashion or beauty book with a strong sense of who you are and what you do or don't agree with! 


Missy
C2017-2026  Mistress Manifesto

 All Rights Reserved including Internet and International Rights

WOULD YOU SUPPORT LEGAL MARRIAGE FOR MORE THAN 2 ADULTS? : MISSY ASKS YOU!

Only if one of them can prove they can AFFORD to?

I wonder, if it was legal to be married to more than one person, how many people would stay married instead of getting divorced, and just marry a second person, or even a third.

What about people you meet who've been married MANY times?  Why do they keep getting married?

WOULD YOU SUPPORT LEGAL MARRIAGE FOR MORE THAN 2 ADULTS?

Your comments?

Missy

SWEET DREAMS and FLYING MACHINES by MARK RIBOWSKY ; MISTRESS MANIFESTO BOOK REVIEW

I read the entire book though there are only two references to our Mistress of the Month, Evey, who is called Evelyne in Mark Ribowsky's book.  She's identified as a Japanese dancer here, and just has to be the same woman.  The book mostly dwells on Taylor's music career, long time drug addiction, and psychology. 

 
I found what the author had to say about Evelyne as well as Taylor's being "highly skilled at the art of deception," as he managed his public personae and reputation, and hid his long history of using drugs and alcohol from the public, though it was only too well known to his friends, family, and the mother of his children, Carly Simon.  It's always quite interesting to me how many co-dependents such a person has, but it sounds like Carly had gone to many psychiatrists seeking help for him and them.  You can say that she has been a devout mother and did for a long time attempt to stay married.
Chapter 19, called Never Mind Feeling Sorry For Yourself, is where we find mention of Evelyne.  The scene;Taylor and Simon have a baby son who is sickly and has to have "delicate and risky" surgery. "During the unbearably tense and frightening hours he was in surgery his father (JT) wasn't there because he was driving his latest plaything, a Japanese dancer named EVELYNE to the airport." (Carly was furious and when he did show up at the hospital. Her manager Arlyne Rothberg saw him and started to scream at him to get upstairs at the hospital.  He did eventually arrive and was bedside as the child awoke from surgery.  Prior to this he sat alone outside the hospital alone and "zoning out."

..."Before going back on the road," JT "thought nothing of trading in the dancer for an actress, Kathryn Walker, with whom he now began spending most of his time." (He would marry Walker.)* 

She, Carly, and his first serious girlfriend of note, called Maggie, were all slightly older women and you could say sophisticated and accomplished women.

The author, though he has spent many chapters explaining that Carly Simon was being driven crazy by her husband, seems not to favor her in the end because he doesn't see her as forgiving enough. Would I?  No way. I think this author gave us plenty of reason why Taylor was so difficult. I know from other reading that he and Walker did divorce, he met and remarried and had twin sons with another woman, his third wife, and now in his senior years seems to have learned to live authentically and soberly, and may have come to terms with his past.  However, in my experience and opinion, some people do leave others with lasting, life-altering pain, even when they themselves reach the point of being sorry they lived that way.  Maybe forgiveness is then over-rated!  Missy


*I read this one on e-book, and on Overdrive.  I found these passages on Evey at approx. pages 1681-1686

CAPE COD and MARTHA's VINYARD