Showing posts with label Womens Studies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Womens Studies. Show all posts

Sunday, June 2, 2024

THE ECCENTRIC and HIGHLY OPINIONATED LADY COLIN CAMPBELL (GEORGIE ZIADIE) : MISTRESSES WERE UNDERSTOOD A CERTAIN WAY

LADY COLIN CAMPBELL
(Georgia Arianna Ziadie)

Hello!

I know my followers are wondering why I'm featuring British-Jamaican aristocrat and BabyBoomer Lady Colin Campbell here at Mistress Manifesto.  I admit at first thought it's a stretch but hear me out. No, I do not think she has been a Mistress. Yes, I think she has some important things to say.  In fact I have arrived at respect for this eccentric and highly opinionated - and rational - woman. 

One of the purposes of this blog is to explore the real lives of past and recent Mistresses - Kept People - Courtesans - an Alternative Lifestyle that may no longer depend on women not being allowed to be educated or unable to financially support themselves another way. This lifestyle no longer depends on adultery for its definition. Nor is it always a heterosexual relationship. No, while we use the term Mantress with fragility, we also realize that men, both gay and straight are experiencing being Kept, even when gay marriage is legal. Sometimes a Mistress (or Mantress) of 2024 is supporting themselves but accepts "help" of some sort from her or his person rather than be the Classic Mistress who is entirely supported financially - sometimes very well - by  a man. We also know that a person who has become a Mistress can also be transgender.  

Lately, as it seems that Democrats and Republicans take opposite sides to the question of medical and psychiatric treatment of children who believe themselves to be born into the body of the wrong gender, we tend to think that this is a modern issue. Well, Georgie was born intersex and the decision was made to raise her as a boy which she was until the early 1960's. She felt she was a girl and the issue emerged again as she went through puberty.  

And her dad - her uncle - and other men like them - had a mistress.  And her mother knew it but accepted it.

I was following the Duke and Duchess of Sussex controversy and drama. I noticed that among those with strong opinions about them was Lady Colin Campbell, born George William Ziadie, eventually changed to Georgia Arianna Ziadie, and is called Georgie or Lady C.  She has a distinct way of speaking,  forthright, creative with words, detail oriented and thought provoking. It's fair to say that she does not think well of the Sussexes. Though I do sometimes listen to BBC as well as some of the more tabloidish publications and broadcasts on YouTube, Lady Colin Campbell is an especially fascinating character herself. She is not only considered one of many "royal experts" and the guest on various televised programs but runs her own YouTube station.  (The link to it is below.) She says that she gets her information from people she is connected to within the aristocracy. 

When I discovered that she was a book author noted for the book The Real Diana, a 1992 New York Times Best Seller List title, that was the first to reveal Diana's unhappy marriage, I searched my Hoopla subscription for her books. I discovered Daughter of Narcissus, a memoir that focused on her childhood as part of the British elite of the island of Jamaica, which has much to reveal about what race relations were there. Perhaps when it comes to the question of the British Royal Family being racist, she might know quite a bit about racism having been raised on an island where white people and people of color most often had employer-employee relationships.


Lady Colin Campbell's memoir proved to be a powerful, can't put it down read.  I cancelled plans to keep reading.

She was raised by abusive parents who were not challenged by other family members or those in their employ. She knew her father and his brother and men of their status were what we call today predators, sexual harassers, even rapists, outside the immediate family. Inside it, as she and her three siblings were being raised to adulthood, there was tremendous physical and psychological abuse. Her mother was what we would call today a Malignant Narcissus, lacking empathy, plotting, attention seeking, turning every story around so that they could be the star. Her father went into rages - beating servants - breaking doors down.  Both parents were excessively concerned with their public reputation.

As I will reveal in excerpting this book, the primary reference for this month's posts, Lady Colin Campbell's father likely had a mistress named Mrs. Powell, and, well, Lady Colin Campbell liked her. In fact, Lady Colin Campbell thought that the mistress, a much-younger-than-her father employee she calls Mrs. Powel, may have provided a respite from his marriage and a sense of actual civilization to the errant Michael Ziadie.

Her mother's personality disorder damaged everyone's lives. Her father was an older man with a personality disorder himself who allowed his wife to be treacherously abusive and was cooperatively and independently abusive himself. Lady Campbell was raised in a family in which she and her siblings were unfairly and cruelly punished by parents who gave one impression as members of high society and a drastically different one where matters were considered to be private. I suspect that as the girl Georgie, being raised as a boy, was already invested in getting to the truth of every situation. Since divorce was not generally considered an option, her parents settled into their dangerous domesticity. Lady Colin Campbell, while advantaged materially, is a survivor of much.

One review of this book from Goodreads was: "Daughter of Narcissus is a stunning analysis by the author of the serious personality disorder of narcissism through her own dysfunctional family, positioned at the heart of international society from the middle of the 20th century to present day. Dr Anna Brocklebank considers it one of the most significant and inspiring books ever written on the subject of narcissism and believes it should become a medical reference book as well as a popular best seller."

If you are the child of a parent or parents who were so mentally ill that they took it out on you, this book may be a must-read.  (And if you realize you are abusing your own children, or you're letting your partner or their parent do so, I beg you to have courage and get psychological treatment first for yourself.) 

Now, before we begin this month dedicated to her, I want to mention more fascinating things about Lady Colin Campbell.

Born in 1949, she is now in her 70's. Lord Colin Ivar Campbell, her now longtime ex-husband, was a son of the eleventh Duke of Argyll. Lord Colin Campbell has said he wishes she would stop using her name - which is unlikely. Well, she obtained it fairy, through marriage, even if their marriage was brief, and either way she was born into the aristocracy. They married after knowing each other only five days but it took months before they started divorce.  She had met him because she was great friends with his sister. He too was severely abusive, even bashing her face in requiring corrective surgery, and then focusing on her body. He was an alcoholic and addict and mentally ill. He took from her financially. He and his lawyers - his family - threatened to ruin her reputation and more thoroughly out her as having been born intersex.  Lady Campbell kept the name thinking she would remarry in a year or two, for she was quite a young woman when she divorced, but that never happened.  She had boyfriends but was hesitant because of all the abuse.  Fortyish with a best seller that earned money and some independent income, she decided what she lacked was her own family. She adopted two sons from Russia and raised them. (The boys are not biological twins as has been reported elsewhere,)

The story of her understanding of her birth defect and resulting gender issues and the horrors she went through with her parents and doctors is something anyone who is interested in today's issues of transgenderism needs to read. The decision that she be raised as a son had been made at her birth and until she reached puberty it seemed as if her siblings and other relatives in the know and the doctors were accepting of that decision but she was considered an effeminate boy. She was given hormones to masculinize her as well as shock treatments circa 1963. She felt that her mother in particular had set her up to be her lifelong companion rather than correct her gender so that she couldn't marry: She references instances in British Royal Family that may have been the same issue.  By 1967 she was threatening suicide if her parents did not allow her to correct her gender to female and was being promised treatment in the United States.

Trouble with teenage classmates lead her to skipping school and applying to Fashion Institute in New York before the age of 18, not only because she loved fashion but to escape. Her father wanted her to stay home as company to her mother. He warned her that no one would want to marry her siblings when they found out that their sister was a "freak." They were selfishly emotionally blackmailing her. 

Being a woman who did want to earn her own living, but also compelled by socio-economic and class considerations unique to her status at birth and sexism in general, she worked in fashion for a while, but turned to writing.  Now she is a commentator. 

Are you ready for the excerpts from her book that focus on the attitude towards mistresses - and the husbands who didn't consider sexuality outside of their inescapable marriages to be anything worth divorcing over? Not even the cruelty of a mother to her children?  Well, consider yourself a member of my unofficial womens study college class here at Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot!

Missy



C 2024 Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot

All Rights Reserved including International and Internet Rights. 



Here's the link to her YouTube Station! https://www.youtube.com/@LadyColinCampbellYouTube

Thursday, November 9, 2023

CASSANDRA PETERSON HEARS THE WORDS "YOU'LL NEVER WORK IN THIS TOWN AGAIN"

Excerpts from the book Yours Cruelly, Elvira by Cassandra Peterson

Chapter You'll Never Work In This Town Again

"It fills me with so much hope and pride that women are finally able to speak out about the treatment we've had to endure from men. Women have always had to worry about the damage to their livelihoods,  not to mention the loss of their dreams and aspirations, which could result from resisting men's unwanted advances, or God forbid, reporting it.  These days men are finally having to think very seriously about the potential damage to their own careers that engaging in this type of sexist behavior may cause.  One way or another, it will catch up with them, and karma's a bitch."

(Cassandra goes on to describe some of the experiences she had beginning as a girl when the neighborhood child molester tried to get at her, another at age 12, then in the 7th grade,)

"Miraculously - seriously - miraculously I made it through my teen years without getting raped, although I had some very close calls. I learned over time to never walk alone at night, to never park in dark areas, to always check to see whether anyone was hiding in the back seat of my car before getting in, and to keep an eye in the rear view mirror to make sure no one was following me.  It's great to grow up feeling like you're being hunted, right girls?"

(On an interview for a national commercial, a man asked her if she liked performing a certain sexual act and got up from his desk without any clothes on below his shirt.) "Shaken I jumped to my feet and headed for the door as fast as my feet would carry me.  As I literally ran down the dark hallway, my commercial aspirations in the dumper, I heard him yell these very words" You'll Never Work In This Town Again."

Please note that I normally cite the page number but the e-book I downloaded does not have page numbers showing.

As I read this, I was reminded of experiences I've had, such as being groped suddenly by a stranger when I sat waiting to get into a restaurant. That man was old and I wondered just how many women had been groped by him, how many got chased around the desk in his office. 

C 2023 Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot  All Rights Reserved Including Internet and International Rights.


Thursday, November 2, 2023

THE THEFT OF CHOICE : SPECIAL EDITION of MISTRESS MANIFESTO FEATURING CASSANDRA PETERSON

The inspiration for this month's excruciatingly uncomfortable subject is the story of her rape in the memoir Yours Cruelly, Elvira by Cassandra Peterson, better known as Elvira, Mistress of the Dark. You may be familiar with the character of Elvira, who years ago started out a long stretch as the hostess of late-night scary B-movies on television, some of them laughable, especially if you were in range of Los Angeles stations. Prior to becoming known as Elvira, Cassandra had what might be called a colorful life, which I'll get to in a moment.

I'm not a fan of horror or scary films and can't remember ever staying up late to watch the show, but I knew about Elvira the way I knew about Angelyne, who I elected as Honorary Mistress of the Month in October 2010, long before she was outed by a mysterious character and then a biopic was made of her life.  If you lived in Southern California in those days then you knew she was around.

Angelyne's mystery was how she could afford to be on so many expensive billboards all around town, how she could afford all the cosmetic surgeries, how she could afford pink sports cars, one after another, and spend so much time driving around Los Angeles and being seen. (She certainly did not seem to have a regular job or much in the way of actual acting work. She did manage to record some music...)  There were always whispers of mysterious benefactors. A friend of mine who had his moment of fame decades earlier and interacted with a number of people in entertainment told me who everyone said Kept Angelyne, which I've never revealed. Just about everything else he had ever told me about various show business people had checked out. But let me get back to Cassandra.

While Angelyne may live 'in character' and be famous for being famous, Cassandra Peterson, who as Elvira in some way got associated in some people's minds with Angelyne, played Elvira as an actor, keeping her private life private but not in a downright secretive way as Angelyne did. Some reviews of Peterson's book mentioned that finally she was getting personal. And she did in her memoir, including about her rape.

Of course Mistress of the Dark uses the term Mistress in a way that I do not here at Mistress Manifesto. Defining Mistress is one of the goals of this blog as we learn about so very many for whom a label such as Mistress might be right. Overall, however, the term Mistress implies a woman who is in command, if not of others, than of her own life, which can also seem to be ironic and contradictory, since in so many novels where Mistresses or Kept women or Courtesans are the main character they are actually subject to a passion that makes them sin.  

When I search for books that are non-fiction in libraries to read and consider for inclusion here, I always encounter hundreds of fictive books in which the Mistress is a character.  Sometimes I think there are hundreds of such books for every one that is non-fiction. Why, I ask myself, are all these novels written, sold, and read?  I think it's because many women do have the fantasy of being in a relationship outside of marriage.

One of the aims of Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot is to to look at the realities. We ask how did (and do) Courtesans, Mistresses, Kept People, Groupies, Harem concubines, and just plain women who have affairs with men who aren't free to marry them, live their lives? We wonder if, as in films, the 'bad girl' is always punished by society or fate.  We do this at a time when people are more open in general about who they are and what they want, and sometimes what they want falls into the category of Alternative Lifestyle.

We love the idea that we have Choice, but how much Choice do we have?

To review the book Yours Cruelly, Elvira:

Cassandra Peterson grew up with an abusive narcissistic mother caused her much pain and a beloved father who did not defend her. She grew up in a lower-middle class home where there was no talk of careers or college for her. She was a Beatles-maniac and long live rock and roll! She became the youngest showgirl in Las Vegas at the time; her parents signed their agreement. She's been Sex Positive and never shy about showing off her physical assets, in particular her breasts. Meeting Elvis Presley, who gave her some wise advice, was the highlight of her life in Vegas. 

Attempting to support herself as she took bit parts and background work, Cassandra Peterson went to Italy where she had some experiences that could have turned out worse. Destitute and squatting, ripped off and escaping a criminal lover, she ended back in America. In Los Angeles she decided to add her natural sense of humor to her bawdy personae. She took classes with the Groundlings comedy troop, which she eventually was invited to join. She and a partner wrote the comedy scripts for the horror show evenings she hosted

In her personal life she was not shy about having sex and didn't hold herself to traditional values. Not religious, she favored the Ernest Holmes Science of Mind way of goal setting. She also lovingly accepted gay men as friends, coworkers, and co-creatives. For a long time she-who-would-someday-be-known-as-Elvira was just scraping by, even when she had room mates or lived with a man to keep the cost of living down, even as she paid her dues and took her acting and improv classes, even as she sought agents, went on auditions, and took rejections.

When I first saw the book as an offering as an e-audio book and an e-book at my library, I thought, what the heck, I'm under no obligation to read it if it turns out it's no good. But it was, surprising so.  First of all, I love e-audio books when the writer/author reads their own work. Cassandra does, expressively, and humorously.  She's frank. And I was surprised at how much I was enjoying the book and could relate to her as a human being. Even if I personally would be far too self conscious to ever be a showgirl, I could certainly understand how much she loved music, how big a deal meeting Elvis and having a good conversation with him it was. I could certainly understand about being true to one's art, even if it didn't pay.

So when I got to Chapter 15, entitled You'll Never Work In This Town Again and she started reading/speaking about it, knowing already that she had been propositioned many times, had been sexually harassed, had been offered work in exchange for sex (in Hollywood called 'the casting couch') by sleazy men, I was unprepared to hear that she had, after fending off and surviving so much, been raped. 

So, this month as a Special Edition here at Mistress Manifesto, the focus is Rape, which is the Theft of Choice and so horribly common, and so hateful towards women, I swear sometimes I think castration should be the punishment. 

Thank You Cassandra Peterson for inspiring this Special Edition.

Cassandra Peterson was married for twenty five years and suffered six miscarriages before finally having a child at age 43. She had long been involved in LGBTQ Rights but had to adjust when she herself fell in love with another woman. When her book came out in 2021 she was seventy years old and had been in that relationship for 19 years. As an activist she has also been involved in PETA anti-fur campaigns. She is also for the Me-Too Movement and is vocal about having been verbally and psychologically abused not only in her childhood, but also in her marriage. 

C 2023 Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot

You might be interested in reading: ANGELYNE THE BILLBOARD QUEEN : RUMORED MISTRESS OF THE MONTH is in the archives for October 2010

P.S. I'm not suggesting Petersen has been a Mistress or a Courtesan or a Kept Woman. Her memoir does not suggest it.

Wednesday, August 2, 2023

REVISITING POSTS FROM THE EARLY DAYS OF MISTRESS MANIFESTO : THIS SHOULD BE FUN!



This song set the mood for Mistress Manifesto when I started blogging in 2009. 

It seems there are hundreds of novels - if not thousands - which focus on the woman character as a Mistress. Often the woman is overwhelmed with passion for the man but strives to regain her power in the relationship.

When it comes to songs with lyrics that acknowledge adultery, very few.  Even though it seems having an affair with a married person isn't a rare occurrence.

Is the Mistress Lifestyle right for you?

I always hope that those of you who are considering an Alternative Lifestyle will read my blog and that learning about people who have lived it will help you make a Choice.

This month I'll be re-posting some of the posts from the first few months I blogged.


ME AND MRS. JONES : BILLY PAUL


SAME PLACE, SAME TIME!



Monday, July 24, 2023

WHAT RUINED BURLESQUE? IS THERE NEW INTEREST? WHAT ABOUT DITA VON TEESE?

In the chapter entitled Bye Bye Burlesque towards the end of Leslie Zemeckis' book,  Beyond the Burly Q, the author reports what various strippers she included in that book had to say about the end of the profession that sometimes also meant the end of their personal careers. Some of them would've aged out by the early 1970's anyway but some simply had no idea what else they could do for a living besides burlesque. They were used to being independent women who earned their own money.

When burlesque first developed as an art form it occupied a gray area of entertainment but was close to a variety show like vaudeville. It was about comedy and included a straight man and other often actors on stage. It was not necessarily about taking it all off. Then over a few decades things changed and the art form was challenged.

The reasons include:  

A new morality in which various cities banned burlesque, which included arresting dancers which made it difficult for them. 

In the 1960's. Go Go dancers who were also often dancing near nude and pole dancing.

The woman's movement (feminism).  (I suppose that in the 1970's feminists thought of strippers as women who were repressed by men, but it was also a time when sexual liberation influenced ordinary women.)

Drag shows by transgender burlesque entertainers and "drag queen" types.

Nudie films that were also shown in the same theaters or between live entertainment.  Some of the dancers were paid a little money to allow filming, not porn, but substitutes for live performances that were then showed in theaters.

Pornography, especially so.

Excerpt page 297:  By the 1960's, a 'burlesque" show was stripped of chorus girls minus the production numbers divested of novelty acts, and missing live musicians.  The emcees were gone, song and dance acts were banished, and specialty dancers were dropped.  

Blaze Starr remembers, "You were on the stage during your act and it was a huge club.  And over all the way across the building on the wall was hardcore porn."

Excerpt page 302:  Once the strip clubs came in burlesque was out. 

My notes. The strippers and others who had worked those theaters felt their art had been degraded by pornography.  However some think that burlesque exists in contemporary  entertainment, citing Lady Gaga, Madonna, Bette M, and RuPaul. 

The argument for the current existence of burlesque is that it was once low culture but went mainstream. The height of burlesque happened in the World War II era when there was a surge in popularity.  (This figures in the story of Blaze Starr being prompted to please the army men in an audience by taking off her top.) In 1931 it went to Broadway and at the 1933 Chicago Worlds Fair Sally Rand and Faith Bacon appeared with fan dances.

However, I think the popularity and success of Dita Von Teese challenges the idea that burlesque is a lost art.  I've watched her performances on YouTube videos (as well as the performances of some of other contemporary dancers). I think Von Teese has created shows that are of the highest quality and that her performances take into consideration how every move will appear to the audience.

C 2023 Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot All Rights Reserved including Internet and International Rights

Saturday, June 3, 2023

FANNY MURRAY : FROM TEEN PROSTITUTE TO MOST POPULAR COURTESAN IN GEORGIAN ENGLAND : ENTERED INTO THE LIFE and REDEEMED OUT OF IT BY ALTHORP SPENCERS

This month we go back a bit further into the history of European Courtesans. Fanny Murray, born Frances Rudman, played out her life as a Courtesan in Georgian period England, London, not Paris, France.
 Later in this month we'll listen to an important panel discussion about present day prostitution focusing on Mexico, and San Diego - Los Angeles California.

                                                      FANNY MURRAY
Born Frances Rudman

1729 -1778

Born in 1729 in the small spa resort town of Bath, as the daughter of a musician, Frances was a child with no advantages. With our modern sensibilities and social services, it's difficult to accept, but the girl may have started out selling flowers on the street to support herself or contribute income to her family and then found sex work was more profitable. No doubt the vacationers to Bath included those seeking sex. By the time she was thirteen, Frances, the child laborer, had at least three 'lovers'. Survival rather than morality prevailed.

At the time actresses, prostitutes, mistresses and courtesans were thought to be, shall we say, of the same ilk. The only way to distinguish one from another was to know who their patron's were. As a courtesan Fanny's came from elite, aristocratic and royal social circles. However, she started out as a young teen prostitute. In all my years of reading and writing this blog about Courtesans and Mistresses, she is the youngest who is documented. 

From my previous research: It was common for women to marry at sixteen. In arranged marriages, to be married at thirteen, though sometimes the bride was not delivered to her new husband for a couple years, or lived with him and his family as a daughter-in-law in training, as there was an understanding that a woman should be fully physically mature before pregnancy. Pregnancy was always dangerous. Marriage was the best option for most women. Marriage was a honorable contract that implied a husband would financially support his wife and children. It was also usually the best option for a woman physically. A faithful wife would have just one man to have sex with and bear children with. The arrangement supported her survival until her death. Dire circumstances, however, dictated otherwise.

The nubile Frances had men in their twenties pursuing her, some who no doubt were addicted to sex with very young females barely out of puberty, even or who had not yet even had a period. Other men were older or just plain old. Our modern equivalent would be the infamous rogue Jeffery Epstein, who in August 2021 hung himself in prison while awaiting trial, and who over many years procured a great number of girls under the fraud that they would be paid to give massages, and with the aid of his executive assistant and sometimes 'playmate' Ghislaine Maxwell, who was convicted of procuring and sex trafficking in 2022. Today we would consider these men dangerous predators.

Among the men who pursued the young Frances was John Spencer the great-grandfather of Lady Diana Spencer - the mother of Prince William who will someday be King of England. This John Spencer may very well have been Fanny's first seducer, and its not known if he paid for that encounter, however, girls were known to earn more money by selling their virginity over an over again with the help of the brothel-keeper, or madam of a 'bawdy house.' That Spencer was of the peerage, from one of the richest families in the Kingdom, was important to Fanny's career as a courtesan. 

Spencer was known as a stunt-pulling practical joker, trying to keep things funny, but by the time he seduced Fanny, he was closer to 40 than 30 and sick as an alcoholic. He was said to have seduced hundreds of young women but, important to our understanding is that there were many men just like him and in that time and place they were not accused, tried, imprisoned, or punished. Also, from my research elsewhere, I wish to mention another reason men went for these girls and that was the knowing that prostitutes usually got venereal diseases, which were feared as they should be. The reasoning was that such a young girl probably did not yet have these terrible diseases.

By 1743 Frances was dumped by Spencer (and another man - making me wonder if they both thought they were her one and only), and became the Mistress of a man named Richard Nash, who fancied himself a protector, but was probably training her sexually. This was a lifestyle upgrade but it lasted just about a year. As author Barbara White points out, her research being extensive and inclusive of various stories, these accounts range from Frances being a "hoodwinked virgin" to willfully seeking out a brothel. They also range in describing what her status as a prostitute in London was when she was the lowest of the low. Many a street prostitute was enslaved and worked until the final stages of venereal disease, when she was thrown the street she was attempting to escape. Some were so poor they didn't own the clothes on their back and were charged for the garments they wore at work, included mended stockings and hair ribbons.

There is also a possibility that Fanny did at some point become infected with a sexually transmitted disease. Be it the feared syphilis or gonorrhea, or perhaps because of abortions, Fanny never had a child, and that was usual among prostitutes. There were many expensive 'cures' for these diseases that were likely ineffective and most required time off. 

In 1744, age fifteen, Frances Rudman changed her name to Fanny Murray and went to London from Bath. Bath had attracted rich visitors who wanted to cure their illnesses in the thermal spring waters, as well as the good-for-nothing who were out to scam the rich. However, it's likely that by seeing the rich and how they lived, Fanny became more ambitious.

In London the madams who worked slave-prostitutes paid little and it was near-impossible to escape when one did not even own her own clothing. However, Fanny did escape and set herself up at her own address and that implies that she was a Mistress again or had the patronage to be a Courtesan. 

By 1747, age eighteen, Fanny was experiencing the attentions of men who wished to lavish her with gifts and otherwise compensate her very well for her time with them. If she had been thought to be reluctant, at this point she is known to have accepted her life and indulged herself. She had the reputation of enjoying pleasures and of spending lavishly but again we encounter a question. How much was show, acting, or the cost of doing business, to attract the big spenders? 

In 1746 her 'protector' was Sir Richard Atkins, 6th Baronet Clapham, who was ridiculed as a love-struck fool for letting her take advantage of him as he set her up finely. The relationship lasted eight years, taking up much of her years when, if she were a common woman, she would've married and had children. There were rumors that the love was real and that they planned marriage or had already had a 'speed marriage' (elopement), but Atkins came from a historic and rich family that was, of course, not comfortable with such a match.The family was also beset with death. Determined to live life to the fullest, Sir Richard himself died at the age of twenty-eight and she never became Lady Atkins.

By 1750 Fanny Murray had all the riches that the famous Parisian Courtesans had. She lived elegantly in the fine neighborhood of Saint James Place, dressed in the latest fashions as well as beautiful, expensive jewelry, traveled in a private carriage, and had an exclusive viewing box at the theater. She was impetuous and lived for the moment, also attracting men of a rougher nature, and is thought to have been indifferent about securing her future.

Then through some misfortune, I speculate the end of a relationship, Fanny may have once again become a prostitute working for a pimp or madam, though this information is suspect. She - or another woman like her - were listed in an actual book of prostitutes as a good for a Jewish man, perhaps a merchant! This woman is called 'brown.'  (I speculate that Fanny was herself Jewish.)

What is understood was that, knowing that this courtesan business was mercurial and that 'protectors' could move on to the next new courtesan without a word, most attempted to keep some men in waiting. Some were open about this while others had to do so secretly, risking the loss of the man who was keeping them in style. Did Fanny always do what was best for her future? Perhaps not, for she was not especially calculating in also entertaining less genteel men. During a period of estrangement with Sir Richard, she may have also fled debtors by leaving the country. But by the late 1740's she was the most popular courtesan ever. Interest in Fanny, curiosity about her, worship of her, came in the form of poetry, art, and fashion, and while women of the highest classes would not socialize with her, women too were interested in her. She would be the equivalent of today's influencer, with thousands of followers on YouTube.

Throughout Barbara White's book, we learn about the history of prostitution in England during the times Fanny Murray lived through. We learn about the overall attitude towards women. Rich men vied with each other to have the favors of popular courtesans and courtesans vied with each other to have the attentions of the richest, best men. To become Kept by a Royal was perhaps the highest one could achieve.  There is no evidence that Fanny ever was, though she may have entertained other men of the peerage and attended parties - even sex parties - attended by members of the peerage.

By 1755 Fanny Murray was withdrawing from any form of prostitution and seeking to live a respectable life. She wrote to perhaps the wealthiest man in England, the son of her seducer John Spencer, who'd died of alcohol before he turned 40!  At twelve years old, this son John became 1st Baron Spencer of Althorp in 1761 and 1st Earl Spencer in 1765. Her existing letters, which reveal intelligence and the ability to write and express herself, and so revealing that the girl who sold flowers on the street had received some education, implore that she wishes to give up the life. Implied is that she put the blame on the man's father for her ruin. She may have also been near dead broke and facing street prostitution or debtors prison. It was a smart move.

From the time that she sought the Spencer's support she never again was a prostitute, mistress, or courtesan, keeping to her pledge to live an exemplary life! This son John and his wife, decided to help her and could afford to; perhaps it was well understood that in fact John Spencer the father had lead her to ruin. She as granted 160 pounds a year for life. It was decided that she should also marry a man named David Ross, an educated man, and an theatrical actor of talent and some fame. It was a match-make that Ross also agreed to with some worry that Fanny would not keep to her promises. Some speculated that he only married her for the money but he had a good salary himself and would continue his acting career for decades. They had a secret, five month courtship and in May of 1756 they married quietly, no honeymoon, and then lived in separate residences for a year.  (I speculate that David Ross was Jewish, and I also do wonder if he was perhaps homosexual. Of all people, why would Spencer have chosen him as a possible husband for Fanny?) Obviously this slow and private courtship reveals Ross was not rushing into marriage.

As Mrs. Ross, Fanny was entirely honorable. For years, however, she and her husband were plagued by her past and her having been depicted as a woman of ill repute for which she was ridiculed. David Ross was a celebrity and continued to have an excellent career as a stage actor, however by 1776 he was aging and in declining health and so was she, and had been for years. She had also lost her looks, her figure. Frances Rudman, Fanny Murray, Mrs. David Ross for twenty years, died in 1778, the Georgian England - American Revolution years being her last. The Spencers had been supporting her as promised for those twenty years and before she died she wrote to thank them.

In upcoming posts we'll explore the possibility that Fanny was a participant in certain sex-clubs in England's capitol, and how she - and others - marketed and promoted herself. Author Barbara White doesn't speculate as I do, but I also wonder if the rumors or facts may have also influenced the Spencers to come to allow Fanny to live far better in her aging than many a courtesan.

C 2023 Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot  All Rights Reserved including Internet and International Rights


Interested in prostitution?  You may be interested to read the following months in my archives.

SLAVIC WOMEN : IMPORTED AS BRIDES - MISTRESSES - TURNED OUT AS PROSTITUTES - RUSSIAN - UKRAINIAN - POLISH    July 2014

HEIDI FLEISS :  GIRL NEXT DOOR TO HOLLYWOOD MADAM TO BIRD SANCTUARY!  WAS BEING KEPT THE TURNING POINT FOR THIS UNUSUAL WOMAN?  March 2020

SEX TRAFFICKING : MORE PEOPLE ARE SEX TRAFFICKED TODAY THEN THERE WERE EVER AFRICAN SLAVES IN AMERICA  April 2021

Also please note that an exploration here at Mistress Manifesto is the question of Choice. While I presently do think some women choose prostitution at a time when there are opportunities for education and employment to do something else with their lives, unlike ever before, I realize not every woman does have those opportunities and that women's income is still not equal to that of men.  Choice does not come into it when the majority of women presently in that business are manipulated into it or forced before they are adults.

I'm basically opposed to prostitution. I suspect that most women who become prostitutes are living lives closer to being enslaved than having made a choice. I'm extremely concerned about sex trafficking and human trafficking in general.

Please note that I read this book as an e-book and any references to page numbers are through the Hoopla app which might not reflect the paper book page numbers.    Missy

Thursday, April 27, 2023

FOR THE TAKING




Dorothy Kilgallen's favorite flower was the rose of lavender color.
Johnnie Ray said he thought they were imported from Holland.

Sunday, September 11, 2022

"GIRLS" IN THE RED CROSS DURING WORLD WAR II : ONE POINT SIX MILLION MOLASSES DONUTS and MORAL SUPPORT

AUBURN EDU - JULIA RAMSEY THESIS 

Auburn University in Alabama offers submitted graduate thesis's online. Julia Ramsey was in the History Department and this is her thesis from 2011. Her paper is called "Girl" in Name Only: A Study of American Red Cross Volunteers On the Frontline of World War II."  It's about a hundred pages and worth the read. It's about women using volunteer work as a way to expand out of the home.

I learned that Clubmobiles were vehicles driven by women who visited troops, bringing burgers, donuts, cigarettes, and other items to the men in a show of support. Because they were considered to be non-military, these women sometimes got closer to the action than women had in any capacity before. The volunteers were strong, independent, and capable, able to handle being surrounded by men who might flirt and wisecrack with them, but the Red Cross needed to portray them as Girls, nonthreatening, so that they themselves would not be attacked. (The Red Cross has managed to keep functioning due to its helpful, non-military reputation.) 

A "Clubmobile" was thought of as a service club on wheels. The original plan was to provide more - movies, stage performances; think Bob Hope's USO shows to entertain the troops.

Try this on. The troops were likely to see action. These visits were a brief escape from the knowing that they might die.

The first Clubmobile went around the London area in October of 1942. Soon they would go to the European continent.  They were jeeps, buses, and trucks. Some carried a movie theatre on wheels.  American military leaders such as Dwight Eisenhower saw the goodness in this work and wanted their men to have Clubmobile services.

Page 9 and 10 EXCERPT:  (There are photos too!)

The Clubmobile that would be predominantly used on the European continent consisted of a converted 6 X 6 GMC truck equipped in the front half with a doughnut frying machine, six coffee urns, a working sink, running water, a water heater, and a portable field cooking range.

The back half of the truck contained a clubroom with books, a phonograph and speaker, and folding bunks for the women to sleep on when unable to return to their base at night.  .... Each vehicle carried a fifteen day supply of doughnuts and coffee and was staffed y three ARC women, who were responsible for driving, preparing and serving the doughnuts and coffee... Before deployment on the continent, the women staffing Clubmobiles endured a rigorous training period in England where they received instruction in driving and repairing their vehicles.

Wednesday, September 7, 2022

PATRIOTISM and SENSE OF DUTY AND SERVICE : COLLEGE EDUCATED WOMEN WHO COULD WHISTLE RIGHT BACK AT THE MEN

College degree - one in six accepted - a knowledge of sports and cars. Could she make and take a wise crack and wolf whistle right back at the men?

In closer than army nurses - to the foxholes. Proof that there is good in the world.

Tuesday, January 11, 2022

SURPLUS WOMEN IN BRITAIN AFTER WORLD WAR I

WWICENTENARY - SURPLUS WOMEN AFTER WORLD WAR II 

It might help to understand what the women of Great Britain faced after World War I, which is a man shortage.  This effected marriage prospects and increased a need and desire for employment.  In this interesting article, which comes from World War I Centenary, 

It begins: More than 700,000 British men were killed during World War One.  This tragic loss of life affected the lives of young women in 1920's Britain.  Virginia Nicholson has discussed in her 2007 book, Singled Out, the difficulties of unmarried women following the gender imbalance of the population which followed World War One.  The  middle classes were especially affected with a higher proportion of officers killed than those in lower ranks.  The 700,000 deaths resulted in a particularly large gap between the male and female populations of people aged 25 -34 with 1.158,000 unmarried women and 919,000 unmarried me, according to the 1921 census.


Saturday, November 20, 2021

NOBLE MISTRESSES IS EARLY MODERN SPAIN - A SCHOLARLY and COMPELLING WORK

SCHOLAR WORKS : GVSU : by GRACE COOLIDGE 2007 

While researching I came across this academic paper by a student named Grace Collidge.  It's title is compelling: “A VILE AND ABJECT WOMAN”: NOBLE MISTRESSES, LEGAL POWER, AND THE FAMILY IN EARLY MODERN SPAIN. It focuses on Mistresses in Spain from 1360-1600. Author Collidge researched over 40 Mistresses, This paper is also about the flexibility of illegitimate status as well as changing ideas about what marriage is and when having sex is OK. It says the influence of the Catholic church was strict but there was also an emphasis on forgiveness.

EXCERPT from page 201

In Spain, if there was no legal impediment to their parent's marriage, illegitimate children were known as hijos naturales and had some legal rights of inheritance if they were acknowledged by their father.  If the parents of hijos naturales subsequently married, then these children were automatically legitimated. The Siete Partidas, which is not very clear on the various categories of illegitimacy, nevertheless notes that natural children are called "natural: for the reason that they are begotten contrary to law, and in opposition to the natural order. The other, and much more problematic, category of illegitimate children is that of hijos bastardos or "bastards" whose parents were legally unable to marry at the time of their birth. The various types of bastards are again classified by the nature of their parent's sins.  Incestuousos are children of parents who were related within the prohibited degrees of consanguinity provided by the Catholic Church, adulterinos are children who had at least one parent who was married to someone else, and sacrilegos were children who had at least one parent bound by religious vows.


The mention of sacrilegos reminds me our Mistress of the Month for October 2011 was STEPHANIA SOLOMONE In Love With A Catholic Priest Unable to Marry. I was unable to find an update on how she is a decade later but I don't think she had children with the priest she was in love with as she said their physicality never went beyond hugging..




Wednesday, November 3, 2021

MELANIE DE GAUFRIDY DE DORTAN : THE FIRST MISTRESS OF ALFONSO XIII de BOURBON of SPAIN


BERTHE MARIE MELANIE DE GAUFRIDY de DORTAN
"MELANIE" 

(1876-1937)


Our Mistress of the Month, Melanie de Gaufridy de Dorton was born in 1876 as a French woman in a family entwined with French history.  According to the web site Anciennes familes de Provence, her family was so important that their records go back into the 1600's. Other genealogy sites suggest the families she sprung from were in place as aristocracy further back into Medieval times. Melanie's family is intermarried with others who appear in The Peerage and can be found in European countries other than France as members of the gentry. And so, like other Mistresses we have learned about, while not Royal, she came from a distinguished background and, as was expected, she made a marriage with a notable man.

Melanie married her husband, Philippe de Vilmorin, a famous Botanist and Horticulturist who collected rare plants and began two arboretums that still exist, one in France and another in Belgium, and they had four children. Then she had a son in 1905 who was fathered by the King Alfonso XIII, and she named that son Roger Leveque de Vilmorin. 

However, as the King married his wife on the 31st of May in 1906, he was unmarried at the time. It was she who was already married. Would he have considered marrying her if she were not? Another thing.  He was born in 1886 so this relationship was with an older woman. Older and married and no divorce for Catholics...

It would seem that the King was not one to be faithful to his wife, Princess Victoria Eugenie of Battenberg; You know that name and you know this ties the Spanish royal family into the British Royal family and to many Royal families in Europe.  She knew he already had this child when she married him.

There are rumors that other or more children born by Melanie were actually the King's. According to various sources which I can't judge for authenticity, the King was also known to have children with other women he could not marry. The other known Mistress, actress Carmen Ruiz Moragas had two children with him. He is also supposed to have fathered children with maids or nanny's. These children have been referred to in Spain and France as "Royal Bastards." Although that sounds like swearing, in fact this was the correct term for illegitimate children. So for him seven children with Princess Victoria Eugenie and one with Melanie and two with Carmen? Another one or two?

Was the King always a man on the prowl? Was he romantic? Seductive? Could a woman say no and make him go away? Did he feel he had the right as King to fool around? (Probably!)  One thing for sure is that these people lived long before media attention could out them for their personal decisions. Now if you're Royal it's most difficult to be discreet.

I don't have exact answers for you. Walls of silence were long ago put up around the King and Queen of Spain. Books about the King and the family that I was able to find don't mention Melanie. However, it would seem that his own father also had Mistresses and extramatrimonial children.

Roger was born in 1905 when Melanie was about twenty-nine years old. The King was barely out of his teens. It seems the birth falls into that Open Secret category. Since Melanie's parents were Roger de Gaufridy de Dorton and Adelaide de Veronnet ,the de implying ownership of the town, Melanie named her son with the King after her father. 

Did her husband know of the relationship between his wife and the King and that the child was not his? Well, they had another child after this, so they stayed married. All of this is just so Old School Aristocrat.  Affairs are tolerated, if not encouraged, because it's just too much to break up the financial agreements and family. (Divorce is just too modern.) After all it's rather an honor that the Royal himself is interested in your wife. And what about the children? They need their mother. As the mother of six, Melanie de Gaufridy de Dorton is one of the most fruitful Mistresses ever profiled here at Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot. Today she has many descendants - grandchildren and great grandchildren.

King Alfonso XIII was also quite fruitful. This is where the various genealogy sites are not in agreement. It would seem he totaled 10 children - or was that twelve? Did his wife suffer or did she go about her business thinking "it is what it is"? 

Your guess is as good as mine.



C 2021 Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot
All Rights Reserved Including International and Internet Rights
Research for this months posts include items linked to and mentioned, as well as many genealogy sites,encyclopedias.,and articles, some of which were repetitive. 

Sunday, May 30, 2021

THE BARBIZON - MISTRESS MANIFESTO BOOK RECOMMENDATION

The Barbizon Hotel was the foundation for independent life of many women who came to New York to start careers in writing, editing, modeling and acting, beginning in the Flapper era and continuing into the 1980s. These two recent book reviews say it all and much more eloquently than I can. From names you've heard, due to the success of the women, to those who came to stay and stayed for years due to rent control, The Barbizon is a hotel that has had a place in women's history. I wish there were more places like it today. If you know where they are, please leave a comment including links to properties!

The Barbizon: The Hotel That Set Women Free
By Paulina Bren

Excerpt: Bren draws on impressive amount of archival research and pays tender attention to each of the women she profiles. (Includes Grace Kelly, Ali MacGraw, Candice Bergen, Physician Rashad and several writers.)

Excerpt: New York City once had more than a hundred residential hotels, places like the Algonquin ... the Carlyle ... the Plaza ...


Sunday, April 25, 2021

OPINION BY MISSY : I TANGLE WITH THE TERMINOLOGY : DEFINING MISTRESS

Through my Coronavirus-19 shut down experience, I've spent a lot of time watching YouTube videos and reading articles on the internet surround the issue of legal prostitution. The name ALICE LITTLE kept coming up as she has reportedly in recent years been the highest earning prostitute known. Little's earnings are reflected in massive tax payments because she is a legal prostitute in the state of Nevada. She hints at the ownership of horses, investment property, and paying so much in taxes that she's sort of funding the county. It's said that Alice Little has made millions. She is a well spoken and intelligent woman who also has been an advocate for prostitution remaining legal in Nevada. She has sued to reopen the brothels closed due to Covid.

As Alice Little, who is four foot eight or nine inches tall and likely uses the stage name Alice Little, states, she is sometimes thought of or called a courtesan, but the wording that the state of Nevada uses on the licensing is prostitute.  I watched a number of her videos in which she exhibits great enthusiasm for her profession as well as "sex worker" knowledge, some of which she openly shares in an attempt to show how friendly she is, tease potential customers, and normalize prostitution. In one of the videos, which seemed to be a recording of a talk show in which she was the guest and the host or moderator asked a number of good questions, Alice said the difference between a Mistress and a Courtesan is that a Courtesan "services" many but a Mistress only "services" one person.  

Ouch!  I do not agree with her definition.

One of the things we do here at Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot is consider definitions as we try to understand what being a Mistress means in the 21st Century.  Although often the word Kept is used for men and women who do not earn their own money, that would also define stay at home wives and husbands - those who do and do not have children - who are dependent on someone else for food, shelter, clothing, and a whole lot more.  I have to say that by suggesting that a Mistress is "servicing" a man, that the relationship is just another way a man pays for sex, turned me off and is inaccurate.

Reviewing the many Mistresses, Courtesans, and others profiled here at Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot, I can say there is plenty of evidence that there is a difference between them and Prostitutes. So maybe it's just Alice Little's prostitute mentality and she doesn't see that Mistresses have relationships with men they are not married to and that Courtesan's may too, but Mistresses choose their relationships. 

Relationships.

Basically, I agree with Nevada definition of Alice and her cohorts who live in brothels awaiting customers who pay for sex as prostitutes. I think applying the Courtesan label to herself is Alice's attempt to up her reputation because she charges so much and might be "choosing" only those customers who can afford her negotiated fees.

Earlier in this blog, I suggested that Courtesan describes a woman who, be it that she has one or many, chooses who she will have in her life, be it pure romance or just sex, or something inclusive of both. She has men vying for her company and
 she does well enough to reject those she is not interested in. Historically Courtesans want the rich life but that doesn't stop them from loving who they love or sharing their riches, including sometimes supporting lovers. Some spurn men who can't afford gifts such as jewelry, fine art, and houses but that used to be saving for a rainy day because there was no retirement. There wasn't a menu of "parties" with rates listed. Nor is the Courtesan hidden away in a bordello. She is out and about with her friends and companions.

Genuinely positive and warm feelings, even love, can exist between a Courtesan and her favorites. That's why Pamela Digby Churchill Harriman, was called The Courtesan of the Century. For many years before she married, she made it her life's work to make wonderful homes for her men, entertaining, dressing beautifully and being an interesting companion, and she stayed friendly with them even as they were breaking with her. This lifelong habit of having a generous spirit resulted in her becoming a fund raiser for the Democratic party. I would never confuse Pamela with a prostitute.

Let's ask these questions: Is a legal wife just "servicing" her husband, so she'll have a man father her children, live with her, maybe have difficulty getting out of a relationship with her, and support her financially?  

Does a woman who is living in a polygamous lifestyle and sharing a man knowingly with other women and who is willing to have as many children as is possible such as the Sister Wives  just "servicing" him?

I realize that most wives today also earn income, and today's Mistresses usually also earn some - or all - of their own income at regular jobs or have careers, but until fairly recently, certainly in the last couple centuries, most wives were totally dependent on their husbands for the financial support. To this day some women are resistant to marriage if a man cannot or will not do this for them. Women who were not married were vulnerable to being preyed upon.

Another "test" of a relationship is this: Would Alice Little or any of the other women who work at the legal brothel still arrange to see a man if they knew they would not be paid?  What if he paid many times and then showed up broke? My guess is no.

I can't ask "What if he pays for companionship and does not have sex?" because that does happen, however, the most modern of services now offered on a prostitute's menu is "the girlfriend experience." This is the paid for time the prostitute spends on a "date" such as going out to dinner, or as Alice Little says, seeing the sights, even going into Vegas (where prostitution is illegal), having fun and getting to know one another better. 
In my opinion the "Girlfriend Experience" is probably the most time consuming and expensive fantasy experience a customer can buy and much easier on the prostitute though she has to be an excellent actress to offer all that to one stranger after another. The so called Girlfriend Experience further blurs the line between what is or is not a relationship and is closer to the Escort Experience, which also, it is said, may not result in sexuality each and every time, but in which the escort is also said to provide companionship. Question again is if the woman who got paid by the hour, day, weekend, or week as an Escort or a Girlfriend will see that person if no money is paid.

Now flip this around and look at dating for women who expect not to have sex or feel at all obligated to have sex with someone, just because he paid for a movie or dinner or some other activity. He probably did pay because he did the asking and he has a higher income: more women with higher incomes are paying for dates as well as Keeping men. 
Dating one or several men, just taking one's time to get the know someone before having a serious commitment and waiting until then is not just Old Fashioned. It's recommended by many dating coaches as the best way to find someone to marry.

No one I know wants to accept a date, especially when she has just met someone, if she thinks or she feels sex with the man will be obligatory payment for a night out. No one I know wants to have a flirtation or simply be curious about another person and accept an invitation to meet with that person socially if they think or feel sex will be expected as payment. I know women who are in love with men who have, from the start, paid for every date but are not yet sexual with them.

I'm with the State of Nevada. When you go to a brothel, which is a place to have sex, legal or not, you are paying for sex with a prostitute, a woman who has sex with many men and/or women for payment, and that is the point, though for one reason or another sex may not happen.

One more thing: one of Alice Little's videos suggests that the fantasy of being with three uniformed "school girls" is certainly possible at the brothel. I don't know for how many more years she will appear youthful enough to play at being a schoolgirl. Because she is so short and has a girl-next-door face it's easy to imagine her in a school girl uniform.  I'm not comfortable that this pedophile's fantasy may be normalizing pedophilia.

Does this kind of "party" embolden a pedophile?


C 2021Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot
All Rights Reserved including Internet and International Rights
Slight editing for clarity March 2025

Please note that in compliance with Google's Public Blogger Guidelines there is no sexually explicit photos or language in this blog, nor links to any sites associated with hiring prostitutes, pornography, etc.  In your comments, please post on topic and consider how you might speak in a college classroom.

Note: March and April 2019 were devoted to Courtesan of the 20th Century Pamela Digby Churchill Harriman, so if interested in learning more about her go to those posts!  Or you might want to run the word Courtesan through the search feature on this blog and see what comes up!