CULTURED CARNATIONS

from Library of Congress

American Carnation Culture (1892)

A THOUGHT

Coming up....  Here at Mistress Manifesto we will be revisiting the world of the Courtesans but though we often go back to France, Paris in particular, we will focus on England.

Some Courtesans became Mistresses, some Mistresses became Courtesans. 

Some of the women who have lived or do live an Alternative Lifestyle eventually marry

 and have more ordinary lives.

Today I wonder.  How much has been or is about CHOICE?

It's said that a Courtesan always chooses her lover or lovers, 

while attracting many and sometimes creating a competition for her company.  

Today it is assumed that the days when women could become Courtesans is over.

Instead, I think, because divorce is a way out of marriage, there is serial marriages, 

or staying in a marriage but having a Mistress - or a series of them.

Was it all about sex?

Was it all about "class"?

Was it all about acquiring all that money could buy?

What are your thoughts?

Leave me a comment!

Missy

 

MESSAGE TO ALL YOU GOOD DADS OUT THERE

I want to say hello to the father's out there - the loving ones - who put that love into action and have earned the right to be called Dad. Sadly, too often these days we hear about the fathers who are nowhere to be found. I'm still betting most dad's are Good ones!

TIED WITH RIBBON

 

CHECK OUT THESE HYPER ROMANTIC QUOTES AND READ THE BOOK ONE CAME FROM : THESE ARE SOOOO GOOD

I found this web site with 111 extremely romantic quotes.  These are good.  Check them out, find one that suits you, make a card and write the quote on it.  Will the one you love collapse in your arms?  You never know!  If the quote is that good, imagine how good the book will be!

EPIC READS- 111 ROMANTIC QUOTES TO READ TO YOUR LOVED ONE

KISS BUT DON'T START WITH THE LIPS

While I was searching for images for this month's posts in public domain, I noticed that there were many of couples in passionate kisses... But a flirt may require less of a rush and more gentleness.  May I advice you linger to kiss a neck, a forehead, a cheek, before you go for the mouth and...  take weeks to get there?

Missy

PS.  The biggest excuse for giving someone a kiss whom you've never kissed is that it's their birthday.  The cheek or temple area is "safe."  Just be sure to make eye contact after that quick dash of a kiss.  Think "I sure would like more!"  Somehow that thought will make it from your brain into your eyes. 

LANGUAGE OF FLIRTATION - CONSIDER THE HAT : THE MOLLY BROWN HOUSE

Good thing we don't live in Victorian times because, if we did, we would have to learn an entire new way of flirting through signaling.  I found this Hat Flirtation list to be quite interesting and there is more at the site: MOLLY BROWN ORG THE LANGUAGE OF FLIRTING

Excerpt:

The history of flirtation using everyday objects can be traced back to the Augustan Roman poet Ovid, who was known, in part, for his poetry teaching about the arts of seduction and love. In Amores 1.4, Ovid directs his married girlfriend in the discreet ways of flirting using eyebrows, wine, hand signals, and jewelry:

Watch me and my nods and my expressive features:

Catch my furtive signs and you yourself return them.

Words that are spoken without voice, I shall speak with my eyebrows;

You will understand the words traced by my fingers, words written in wine.

When the wantonness of our love comes into your mind,

With tender thumb touch your blushing cheeks;

If you shall complain about me in the silence of your mind,

Your soft hand should hang from the end of your ear;

My dear light, when I do or say things which please you,

Turn your ring round and round your fingers;

Touch the table with your hand, as men in prayer do,

When you pray for many sufferings upon your deserving husband.

 

A LITTLE PRESENT FOR NO SPECIAL REASON - YOU WERE THINKING OF THEM WHILE AWAY

If you started dating someone, giving them an expensive gift may be inappropriate. If you spend too much, such as on jewelry with precious stones, they may even feel obliged to reject the gift.  The key here is to gift a person you want to warm up a romance with by choosing something nice that shows that you were thinking of them while away - out of town - on a vacation - on business. Have it in a box with some tissue and a simple ribbon. No need to go crazy on wrapping and bows. It's a little something - a flirt.

I like things you can buy at museum stores.  A book on an artist they like...  A scarf... a plastic dinosaur?  Please no postcards or tiny boxes of chocolate. 

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FUNNY VALENTINES

There are many kinds of Valentines you can send. Flirting is not serious.  So send a FUNNY Valentine.  This lets a person know you're interested but doesn't put pressure on them.  And the best way to avoid making them feel pressured is to give them a Valentine like you would when you were in grade school. If you can, choose a vintage valentine from when they themselves were in grade school, which will have a tinge of sentimental value.  (Got that?  If they were born in 1960, aim for 1965 - 1968!) Luckily there are Valentines all over the Internet that you can print out in color.

How will he or she know if you just gave them the Valentine because you're giving them out to all your friends.  They don't.  Which is good.

DANCING IS YOUR OPPORTUNITY TO WHISPER

Seek out the places in your area that hold dances. Slow dances. Not loud discos or parties. Perhaps a country club?  You don't need to be a champion in ballroom to hold on to someone - not too tight - not to close - but close enough for you to smell their scent and they, yours.  Dancing close gives you the opportunity to make eye contact, and you should.  Take this opportunity to whisper some sweet words.  "You smell good."  "You look so handsome/beautiful tonight." "I'm having a good time. I'm so glad you invited me!"  "I want to stay a while longer, but I'm looking forward to going home." "Save the last dance for me!"

Compliments such as these can get you everywhere.

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THE SHORT BUT SWEET MASH NOTE

A mash note is not a love letter, it's just a note.

You do not have to be in love.  You do have to have a crush.

You might slip someone one of these:

Or...

Think of three things you honestly like about a person.

Then write something that is true, something like this:

I like your easy laugh,  that sparkle in your eyes.  When are you going to ask me out?

You can fold your note up like you did in junior high. You can put it in a tiny envelope spritzed with your cologne or perfume. The main thing is to pass it off to the person you're flirting with. Be brave. There must be some way to do that without anyone noticing?

What's this? They will think as they unfold...

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FLIRTING 101 : MISTRESS MANIFESTO'S FLIRTING ISSUE

Yes, my romantic readers, this month we are going to explore FLIRTING. I'll start out by admitting to you that I love to flirt!  Flirting can be fun and that's the best way to take it, as fun, to not read too much into it. Of course, it depends on what you say or what you do, what you're communicating with your flirt. Flirting can be just the thing that gets you noticed, signals to someone that you are interested, or that can lead to ROMANCE.  If you're in a relationship, it can keep the spark alive.

If you are already in a relationship, well, don't stop flirting.  If you've never flirted - start.

Everyone wants to feel noticed, beautiful, special. 

This month is going to be full of information on flirting. 

I'll have some good ideas for you.

It's up to you to follow through.

Let me know what happens!

Missy

LOVELY

image from pvpproductions through Freepics

 

COMING UP: PLAYING IN A FANTASY...

There is no better month than December to play in this fantasy... 

Not limited to women, though in real life it's usually women who lean into it...

See you December 2nd for a Special Edition of Mistress Manifesto!

BLAME IT ON MY YOUTH : CHET BAKER

MARIA LACZYNSKA WALEWSKA and NAPOLEON'S EX WIFE EMPRESS JOSEPHINE BECOME FRIENDS : NAPOLEON GOES INTO EXILE and MARIA DIES

Josephine, Napoleon's now ex wife extended an invitation to Maria Walewska that they should meet.  Obviously during her passionate romance with the Emperor, Maria had hoped to someday, perhaps when her man was done with war, to have a domestic life with him, to become his wife perhaps.  Whatever her feelings for Josephine, she had avoided contact with her. Now the two women had Napoleon's ongoing influence in their lives in common.  And so Maria went, with the small son that she had with Napoleon to meet Josephine.

Excerpt page 192:...  Mademoiselle Avrillon, Josephine's lady-in-waiting, recalled in her memoirs that 'the ex-Empress developed great affections for Madame Walewska.  She often talked of her unusual qualities and went to great lengths to stress that this woman, so essentially kind and good-natures, had never caused her any pain.  She set her frequent small gifts and showered presents on the little boy, whose features so reminded her of the Emperor.'

Josephine was only to live another year, and Maria would live another four.  But before she passed, Maria met a cousin of Emperor Napoleon's Philippe Antoine Ornano, a newly appointed general, age appropriate, good looking, a charmer with a good character. She would marry him.

Napoleon was finally defeated enough to be forced to abdicate and had to go into exile in Elba, Italy. He'd tried to commit suicide with poisons before he signed the agreement and Maria had traveled to see him in Elba. She intended to live there with him and their son if he would allow it and even brought her jewels in order to provide money.  The lovers once again had a romantic interlude but when the word got out, Napoleon panicked and sent Maria away.

Eventually Naples became the place that Maria lived.  It was a part of Europe that was enjoyed by many of European's nobles and aristocrats, because of the weather and because they could meet up with each other. The winter warmth, boating, hunting, and celebrations abundant.

In 1815 Anastase Walewski died.  Napoleon fled Naples.  Maria went back to Paris with their son.  She married Ornano in early September 1816 and was soon pregnant. In January 1817 she arrived back at Walewice, Poland and there was found to be seriously ill with kidney disease. She had been warned in her previous two pregnancies not to breast feed because of this kidney problem but had anyway.  Now her health was precarious.  She gave birth in Liege in 1817 to Rodolphe Auguste Ornano, her third son.  She died at thirty one, in December of 1817.

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****

MARIA LACZYNSKA WALEWSKA and NAPOLEON BONAPARTE : THE BEGINNING OF THE END

After  months with Napoleon in Austria at the Schonbrunn estates, the time came for Napoleon to move on.  She was pregnant with his child, and he was ready to quickly divorce Josephine.

Excerpt page 139:  On the last day before her departure from Schonbrunn she presented Napoleon with a ring, a gold and enamel band with a lock of her hair entwined under the surface and inscribed: "When you have stopped loving me, remember that I love you still.' It did not cross her mind that their idyll was nearing its end.

***

Maria was depressed and near a nervous breakdown, her pride wounded too, when she realized Napoleon's machinations.

There is no doubt in my mind that Maria's husband must have been contacted.

Except page 143: In April (1810), in a ceremony of golden splendour, the Emperor (Napoleon I) married Marie Louise of Austria.  Maria Walewska learned about the event from the newspapers. She was back in Poland by then, living at the castle of Walewice (her home as the wife of the owner), as in the first years of her marriage - invited there by her husband, to await the birth ' of a Walewski descendant.'

How had this surprising reversal come about?  Walewie was the last place Marie had expected to return to for the birth of Napoleon's child.  She had planned to have the baby in Paris, but after a few weeks in the French capital she sadly came to the conclusion that it would be less painful for her to withdraw from the scene and return home to Kiernozia.  The truth was that she had become an embarrassment to Napoleon...

Maria had known that he was divorcing Josephine but... Napoleon had an intermediary speak to Maria's husband, who was seventy-three years old, and was open to doing Napoleon a favor. Her family luckily greeted her with open arms.  She gave birth to Alexander Florian Joseph Colonna Walewski on May 4, 1810, and he would become the Foreign Minister of France decades later.  The birth record states the Walewski is the father and is signed by the doctor.

Alerted that he had a son, Napoleon sent a gift of lace but then for three months she heard nothing from him.  Napoleon finally wrote to her, but he called her Madame. He asked her to come to Paris and assured her of his affections.

***

Maria had been married when she became the mistress of a married man, who had now remarried.  In November of that year, Maria took her two sons with her as well as maids, cooks. nurses and other servants and traveled to Paris.  The Parisians had liked Josephine and their attitude was that Napoleon should have just stayed married to her.  Napoleon did not want her womanly love any more.  Paris was to be her permanent home and this time around she would not shy away from society.

***

Excerpt page 152-153:  He ordered that she be received at Court and treated as a distinguished foreign friend, and of course it was right, according to the custom of the day, that he should handsomely provide for her and their son.

As if to compensate Maria for the change in their relationship Napoleon saw to it that she was installed in Paris in princely fashion.  The house i the rue de la Houssaye was refurnished in elegant Empire style, and a country residence was acquired for her ... Free tickets to all Paris theaters were put at her disposal, and she had her own special box at the Opera and the Theater re Francais.  She was also granted free entry to the various museums in tow,... According to the records of Napoleon's Private Purse, she received a monthly allowance of ten thousand francs, a handsome allowance by all standards... Sometime in 1811, Maria was presented at Court and had to meet Napoleon's wife. Soon Napoleon would war with Russia. He was in his early 40's and was showing his age.

***

In 1812 Napoleon decreed that the estates situated in the Kingdom of Naples would be given to his son, Count Alexander Florian Joseph Colonna Walewski...  In his way Napoleon I did in fact take care of his ex mistress and his son. In fact she was now a rich woman, rich enough to provide funds to the Polish military. In this way, her allegiance to the Polish nation which had been an impetus for her involvement with Napoleon.  However, after Napoleon was forced to abdicate the King of Naples took back the lands so that this son was left without estates. In 1814, however, the lands were returned to Alexander.

C 2023  Commentary and selection of excerpts. 

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RETURN TO SENDER

DO YOU FANTASIZE ABOUT BECOMING A KEPT PERSON?

I'd like to hear your story!

What gender are you?

What is your education?

What is your employment?

Would being Kept improve your life?  How so?

Missy

 

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