MARIA CALLAS : FAME FROM TALENT and TEMPERMENT

Original Post from October 5, 2010

This opera singer came into fame through her exquisite talent. Maria Callas probably met many men who wanted her. But who did she want most? A married man. Ari Onassis. We cannot say that his being married is what kept her interested in conquering him for this frustrated her. Yet, they were a two career couple - both busy.
 
She thought he was "it" and his marriage was besides the point.

Video here placed June 2021  Probably better than the old one too!

THE RAGGEDY END OF A RELATIONSHIP WITH ARISTOTLE ONASSIS and AN OPERA CAREER: MARIA CALLAS' LIFE ENDS AT ONLY FIFTY THREE

This post wraps up the coverage of Lyndsy Spence's devastating book about the life of Maria Callas though you'll have to read all the details I could not possibly include in this month's dedication to the opera star. 

Betrayed by Aristotle Onassis, Maria Callas accepted that it was over with him. He married Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy and a month later he called her and expected her to pay attention to him. She ignored him and phoned her and then he threatened to drive his car through the gates of her building. So she saw him but remained firm. Though the former First Lady and the Greek Shipping Magnate had a contract that she would spend two nights a week with him (implying sexual agreement) he expected Maria to have sex with him. Maria gathered her strength to consistently reject him.

Callas's career continued to be blotted with interruptions, changes of mind, and various reasons to cancel. She saw that she could not return to the stage because the public would always expect more of her, not less. An extraordinary tragic actress?  Would she shine in a film of Medea? 

A fortune teller told Maria that she would die young but would not suffer. (Her body double's costume caught fire and it was reported it was she! She was also firm in her opinion that her mother and sister were leaches when they called to express concern after hearing of the incident in the media.) For a film she lost weight to go down to130 pounds and also got an eye lift and did her best. Her film debut in 1970 was well received out of respect for her more so than the film. 

It seems that Maria Callas had a harsh awakening but had gained her perspective.

She told reporters that year that Aristotle Onassis had been an addiction and it was over.  Onassis turned himself into the victim and said Jackie made him unhappy and so their dynamic changed and Maria now called what she had with Aristo a platonic passionate friendship. However she was escorted by famous men and gained her more modern and independent outlook, Maria could not give up on the man. Jackie had spent 20 million dollars the first year of their marriage and Aristo was starting to hate his wife, but Maria, who had been with Aristo for nine years, gave in to him again. The marriage contract with Jackie allowed him a mistress!  But when he took up with Jackie again, Maria took an overdose again. She always claimed these were accidental overdoses.  This time the press got word and it was printed in Paris that she had overdosed. She sued to preserve her reputation.

Perhaps at this time Maria Callas' was at the height of her fame. Now the opera star said that she and Aristo were best of friends. Privately she was conflicted about him. She saw that he had a split personality. He said he wanted a divorce from Jackie but was also bound by their marriage contract so he cut her Jackie's allowance and started treating Jackie as he had Maria. Jackie made a life for herself in America as a response.  Maria wanted the world to know how badly Aristo had treated her though.

In 1971 she finally filed for divorce in Italy as a new law had been passed. It was rumored she would marry Onassis, who was also supposed to be filing for divorce. Maria Callas had finally grown into herself, dressed as she wished, wore pants and joked about her fat legs and wore her eyeglasses. Her self-acceptance - self-love - made her stronger to reject Aristo.

She knew some wanted her to come out of retirement and she hesitated and rejected one offer after another for stage and to make films.

She did sing at the Royal Festival Hall in a London Farewell Concert.

You can watch it here.  And as I watched it, I could not help but think that it was almost impossible to believe this woman had lived through so much. Beautiful, graceful and gracious, entirely professional, I can only wish that at some moment in time before her death in 1977, that Maria Callas had a sense of how far she had come and how much she had accomplished. The people around her tormented the perfectionistic Diva but one hopes that she learned to love herself.

Missy

Maria Callas 'London Farewell Concert' at the Royal Festival Hall with Giuseppe di Stefano, 1973

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20th CENTURY JEWELRY and THE ICONS OF STYLE : MISTRESS MANIFESTO BOOK REVIEW

Post originally on Mistress Manifesto on May 26, 2018 

With Maria Callas, our opera singer Mistress of Ari Onassis, who was left behind temporarily when he married the windowed First Lady Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy, on the cover, who wouldn't want to see what fabulously expensive gems she owned.  And another of our Mistresses, Wallis Simpson - who became Duchess of Windsor when the King abdicated so he could marry her, is included.  Besides bios of some of the world's wealthiest and arguably most beautiful and accomplished women in the world included (what about that Daisy Fellowes?! Or what about Ganna Walska?!) you might want to page through this one and read the bios but also, as I did, think to yourself, that a piece is gaudy or that you wish you could own a mock-up with cubic zirconia if not the real thing!  I and a friend paged through together and did think a lot of the jewelry was too much, that it overwhelmed the wearer and the dress in most cases.  But something very lovely about this book is that the necklaces, bracelets, earrings, and rings photographed are shown with photographs and paintings of the women wearing the items, putting them in scale, as well as some design sketches done before a single stone was reset.  Now famous jewelers and designers are name dropped in this book as you might expect - Cartier, Van Cleef and Arpels, Boivin. Boucheron, Faberge.  Some of these jewelers remade pieces to update them or to combine the gemstones from more than one old necklace.  (Kind of like my old friend K who wore a diamond ring that used her husband's mother's and grandmother's stones.)  You may decide you like diamonds mixed with turquoise or red coral or not. The tiger motif was very popular apparently.  And then there are the diamonds and pearls that are worth more than you'll earn in a lifetime. As for Onassis, you will find him in this book looking unexpectedly dapper and handsome when he was younger with more society babes than diva Maria.  As for the Duchess of Windsor, who was plain old Wallis Simpson before she made her inroads into British society, those of you who are fascinated with this women will be happy to see photographs of her happy and having a good time and looking radiant and even beautiful; she wasn't always sullen or looking lonely out a window!

Interested in Maria Callas? - in my archives for Maria Callas she is Mistress of the Month for January 2010.
Interested in Wallis Simpson? - Duchess of Windsor - in my archives for Wallis Simpson Windsor, she is Mistress of the Month, August 2010.

MARIA CALLAS: NO PURPOSE IN LIFE - CODEPENDENT - DOMESTIC VIOLENCE : AND THE THREAT OF JACQUELINE BOUVIER KENNEDY

In Italy, Maria Callas' marriage remained valid, making it impossible for her to marry Aristotle Onassis, despite their purposeful but "jokey" lies to the press. Both had the Greek Orthodox church in their heritage and her marriage to Giovanni Battista Meneghini was not recognized by that church, but no matter. At forty-two years old, Maria was without a purpose in her life. She had given up singing. And she gave up her American citizenship and regained her Greek citizenship thinking that might further her desire to legally divorce. Living on the Greek island he owned, Scorpios, Maria could not hide the reality of their failing relationship from staff, Yet on that island, she felt she could hide from the world. Swiss cosmetic treatments did nothing to help Maria have Aristotle exclusively. Her desperation to have him was not attractive and on Scorpios he gave her a beating so bad she feared for her life.

Maria Callas kept forgiving and making excuses for Aristotle Onassis' behavior. Aristo was not in good physical condition, which worried Maria, and he was also abusing sleeping pills, drinking heavily, and giving himself steroids and taking other medications that he thought would improve his virility. Having overdosed herself in suicide attempts, Aristo's alcohol, cigarettes, and all the rest gave reason for her worry.

 

By the summer of 1966, Maria knew the relationship was ending. Aristo was still feuding with Ranier III over Monaco but also part of the Paris social scene. Onassis did not regard her or treat her as if she were his wife but as a courtesan. He felt no obligation towards her and wanted her to be independent of him. The press reported that they had split. In Venice, Italy, on the beaches of Spain, and on the ship, the Christina, she was no longer at his side. He might have purchased an apartment for her in Paris, though to save face she said she had bought it herself, but Ari hosted a dinner for Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy in that city.  No other woman, from long ago or the near past was a bigger rival to Maria than Jackie. No doubt Maria lived around Aristo and for Aristo, but why didn't he set her free?

That is my question. Why was he so sadistic and mean that he wanted to break the will of one of the most talented and well known women in the world, while he pursued another?  He could be overly affectionate of Maria in public and then abandon her to visit with Jackie.  Maybe his judgement was clouded by lust but he proposed marriage to Jackie, negotiated with her brother-in-law Ted Kennedy for a financial settlement upfront; Aristo suggesting $3 million, she suggesting $20 million. He married Jackie.

Meanwhile Maria left for Las Vegas, where she overdosed. Then to Mexico, where she overdosed again. Maria Callas was falling apart psychologically, emotionally, and physically.

Onassis told Jackie he would protect her. To others he claimed to be behind the assassination of President John F. Kennedy's brother Robert Kennedy.  Author Lyndsy Spence writes that Jackie was romantically involved with Robert at one time after the assassination. Onassis had been romantically involved with her sister, then Princess Lee Radzwill. The twists and turns of the involvements of these strong personalities is truly a Greek drama or perhaps the plot of a tragic opera. 

We see that exquisite pain is not reserved for the poor.

Missy

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MARIE CALLAS : "GOD HAS GIVEN ME TWO BIG CROSSES TO CARRY" : AN UNDERSTATEMENT IF THERE EVER WAS ONE!

In this post I'm conscious of developing some strong opinions about Maria Callas and her life. - Missy

In chapters 14 - 15 of Lyndsy Spence's book, we learn just how horrible the relationship between Maria Callas and Aristotle Onassis was, an on and off again relationship in which he challenged her belief that it would work out in the end with affairs with other women, including Princess Lee Radziwill, the sister of First Lady Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy, and then Jackie herself. Maria Callas came to realize that the man she called "Aristo" was a liar and manipulator who exaggerated his stories of his dramatic life for effect. This book gives us a devastating account of domestic violence and madness. Why did Maria allow Aristo to treat her with disrespect? He even beat Maria, sometimes badly. Was she so influenced by old Greek attitudes of how men treat women, how husbands treat wives?

In 1962, Maria was thirty-eight and had devoted her life to developing her operatic voice and her career. She wanted to be married to Aristo but was also always conscious of trying to have some control over her public image and the media. He played her like a yo-yo. When she said that God had given her two big crosses to carry, she meant her mother and her husband.  I'd add to that her father, her sister, Aristotle, the media, personalities associated with the opera including competitors, the courts, and people in the record making business, her ongoing struggles with weight and appearance and low self-esteem. There seemed to be no part of her life was peaceful.

Maria Callas began to give less than stellar performances, and to face that her career as a singer would be ending, yet there were options for recording (making records) and the possibility of staring in a film which also faltered. She would give her last opera performance at the age of forty-two.

This began an era in which Onassis wrangled to keep control of the principality of Monaco while Prince Ranier III prevailed. Onassis spun his web of deceit not only on Maria Callas, but on Princess Lee Radziwill, as he aimed to have the ultimate trophy wife -  Lee's sister, Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy.  Aristo believed that all women had sex for money and it was only a matter of how much.  He gave mistresses bracelets worth thousands as a goodbye gifts. Eventually he would give such a bracelet to Lee.

Maria Callas may have been a hypochondriac or she might have dealt with sexist doctors who made little of her complaints. She had surgeries for abdominal hernias and, in 1963, there's a possibility that she had another pregnancy or abortion, though this may have just been a rumor as she gained weight.

As her Mother continued to create embarrassment for her in order to financially gain from Maria, Maria and Aristo both seemed to have spoken to the media in ways that were not just from concern about reputation, but also to manipulate each other. They were co-dependent in this way and also, eventually, in the use and overuse of prescription drugs. While Mother was clearly unstable and wicked, something I felt conscious of as I listened to the audiobook is that Maria herself is cast as having to live with so much turmoil but is not outright called mentally ill or unstable herself.  I think she was, and I say that conscious of stereotypes of women, strong women, women who have earned their status and money, who are demanding. Was she independent? Emotionally she seems needy and dependent on the approval of Aristo.

Maria would eventually be emotionally blackmailed into providing some financial support to both her parents, and her mother was willing to attempt suicide to accomplish this. However, Maria seems to have been a hysteric; she too would attempt suicide a few times over Aristo.

Staff, including those aboard his ship, the Christina, were aware of Maria and Aristo as a couple, how they went from holding hands to have arguments, how he sailed without her or got her off the ship because another woman was taking a cruise with him. He would sometimes have Maria on board with her rivals, such as Princess Lee Radzwill, and then make a show of ignoring her. He disappeared for long periods of time when he did not contact her. Perhaps one of the most evil things Aristo did to Maria was play on her insecurities about her body, her weight, and her loss of weight, as she likely developed an eating disorder to become thin and then he'd claim to be attracted to bigger women. At one point she was keeping track of what she ate, each gram of food, knowing that the tiny feminine Princess was his ideal. (Actually he liked androgynous  women.) Author Lyndsy Spence writes that Onassis was also a good customer of the prostitutes of Parisian Madame Claude.

Though Maria was capable of self-support and earned well enough to afford Swiss clinic cures, an elaborate and plentiful wardrobe, world travel, and the support of her parents, Aristotle Onassis was significantly richer. Like a Classic Mistress, Maria was gifted a Paris apartment, though she lived with him in his. She wore the clothes he bought for her.  Because her career decline coincided with her desire to be available to Aristo when he called upon her to cruise, she came and went as he wanted, often waiting for his attention. As the press demanded to know where the relationship stood, at different times both Maria and Aristo claimed they would marry and then said it was a joke.

Their relationship was co-dependent. It was also volatile. Aristo provoked Maria and manipulated her. She screamed at him in front of friends and business associates. Before Onassis screaming had been limited to what she wanted out of the operas she performed in. 

Maria lied to herself about her relationship with this destructive and cruel man, who wanted to even the score with Robert Kennedy, the Senator and brother of President John F. Kennedy.  Had Aristo used Princess Lee to get to Jackie? 

Even as he courted the widowed Jackie after the assassination of her husband, JFK, and showed her his private island Scorpios, Aristo did not let Maria go. It's my feeling that her adoration for him was something he needed. 

When her voice cracked during a performance and she started over, Onassis went backstage to congratulate her on her courage. As she attempted suicide in Paris, he found her and walked her around the apartment to keep her alive. But he had provoked her. That was when she found a love letter and gift of jewelry meant for Lee.

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MARIA CALLAS - TOSCA

DIVA INDEED!

Originally posted  August 29, 2010

MARIA CALLAS : METAMORPHASIS : THE END OF MARRIAGES andTHE BEGINNINGS OF A DIFFICULT RELATIONSHIP WITH ARISTOTLE ONASSIS

In her early thirties, soprano opera star Maria Callas finally lost the weight  that had plagued her and became fashionable. On stage she wore gorgeous costumes but it was now the time in her life to dress for her fans, the international public. In 1954 Maria went to a Swiss clinic where she accepted a new type of weight loss medical treatment; Special shots to stimulate the weight loss and injections into her thyroid. She lost 140 pounds and developed an hour-glass figure. She also had her teeth capped and surgery to slim her upper arms and lift her eyes. She had spa treatments like massages and facials. But the more fascinating fiction was the rumor that she had swallowed a tape worm in a glass of champagne out of desperation!

Then Maria Callas went out shopping and bought in excess. She possessed hundreds of dresses, hats, and shoes.

She was recording. She was performing. Her new beauty attracted to her even more men fans. Yet she was very married, and by the Italian way of thinking, however her confidence improved with her appearance, however "flirty" she might be at times, she was off limits.  Even if her marriage was one of "convenience" and her husband was rumored to go for fat prostitutes?

By 1949, Maria may have reached her most commanding and demanding phase, the Diva phase, you could say. She was having issues with her contracts, lawsuits had started to fly, and she was cast in the press as not just difficult, but a tyrant. However, she was also doing interviews and performances on television. Would we in our feminist consciousness think she was too demanding? Hadn't she earned the right to defy her husband as agent?

Her reason for living was singing but, some realized that her voice was in decline. After years of training and exercise, the sour or shrill note was noticed. In the 1958-1959 contract era, Maria Callas was fired from the Metropolitan, the opera company in New York that had been her goal in coming to America all those years before because she hesitated to sign the contract. However, she made appearances in many other cities in America and Europe and these productions might not have been the Met, but they were sold out.

And Maria Callas still wanted a child. Time was running out. She spoke of remarrying after her husband died just as rumors that she was infertile swirled. She was married when, after a performance, she met Aristotle Onassis and his much younger wife, Tina, who invited them to sail on the Christina, the Onassis pleasure ship. This first invitation was declined. Aristo's marriage with Tina had been breaking before he met Maria. Tina had two children with Aristotle but was bored with the jet set life style and her husband's abuse.

A society hostess, Elsa Maxwell, got herself into the situation, encouraging the two towards each other, and told Maria to take everything in life that was offered her. Meanwhile, Onassis' attitude towards love was that all women eventually had sex for money - so to speak.  Not outright cash but in exchange for jewelry, gifts, travel. He pursued Maria, claiming he was married in name only. She was flattered to be pursued by a man with such ardor, passion and intensity.  Maria began to have serious problems with her husband who she now considered to have been pimping her - as her manager. As confrontations with her husband increased, Maria was also not taking Aristo's calls. However, she well knew that the Italian attitude laws regarding divorce put her at a terrible disadvantage and then there was her career and reputation both as a woman and an artist.

The Principality of Monaco figured into the romance. The tiny principality might not have been officially owned by Onassis but he owned the casino and so the income into Monaco. And his boat, the Christina, named after his only daughter, was docked in Monaco.

Another invitation to cruise came from Onassis, who had the famous British Winston Churchill and his family aboard the Christina. This time Maria Callas and her husband, Giovanni Battista Meneghini, accepted the invitation.

Maria Callas and Aristotle Onassis had things in common. They spoke Greek together. She laughed at his jokes. They dined alone. The two of them went to a holy site of the Greek Orthodox church, the religion they both were raised in, knelt together, and received a blessing: Maria would consider this to be like a marriage. (Though not divorced, her Italian marriage was not recognized by the Greek Catholic Church.) Then, it was clear to others on the Christina that Aristo and Maria were having an affair. Tina Onassis used the situation to her advantage in asking for a divorce from Aristotle. But, had Maria misunderstood her seduction?  Aristo had told her of his sexual exploits and at the end of the cruise he gave her a bracelet which was his way when he was through with a mistress.

Ten years younger than her husband, but still an "older man," Aristo became Maria's obsession. Back home in Milan she immediately asked her Giovanni for a divorce. Since she was an American citizen, Maria wanted to have a fast American divorce, which, at the time, was fastest in the state of Alabama. (Tina Onassis too would consider Alabama.) Maria's husband was not going to let her go easily.  He showed his character by using threats of International shame to keep her married to him. To the public she stated that Onassis had nothing to do with the divorce. Maria's horrible mother threatened to put a curse on her, again not concerned with her daughter's happiness, only that Maria continue to earn and keep her family in money. As rumors of the affair became international, Maria threatened to kill her mother.

Was Ari the real reason for demanding a divorce - finally - when her marriage had been a disappointment to her as a woman? According to Lyndsy Spence, whose book Cast a Diva, is the prime reference for my posts this month, here at Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot, Maria did become pregnant by Aristotle Onassis.

I'm aware from other books that this has been a controversial question.  Some suggest that Maria had a baby in secret and the child was adopted.

In 1959 Giovanni Battista Meneghini did file for a legal separation from Maria Callas.  The Italian law was in his favor and if she remarried without an Italian divorce, she might be considered a bigamist. Italy had been of great importance to her opera career. She worried that if she had a child, her husband would take it from her. Onassis wanted her to have an abortion and it was rumored his wife, Tina, had abortions as well. Maria had wanted a child for years and so it must have been crushing when, around her fourth month, she either had an abortion or a miscarriage.

In Monaco Arstoi and Maria and been photographed dancing together. She announced that they would marry, which he dismissed as a joke. By 1961, Onassis had gone on cruises on the Christina without Maria but also with her. There were opinions that she was loosing her voice, but could any opera singer go on for decades? Onassis became verbally abusive of Maria, and it was her weight and her looks, the things she had so little confidence because of, that he picked on.

It occurs to me that Onassis was one to enjoy the pursuit of a woman and that Maria seems to have been far more serious about him than he was to her. Did he ever actually love her?

I will continue on in the next posts about Maria Callas and Aristotle Onassis...

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CIGAR

 Ari Onassis, rich as a Greek shipping magnate,

 was a true cigar aficionado, 

rarely seen without a habano between his fingers.

MARIA CALLAS : MARRIED TO GIOVANNIE BATTISTA MENEGHINI : FROM SUCCESS IN ITALY TO ARGENTINA : SHE WANTED A BABY MORE THAN HER CAREER

Maria Callas and  Italian, Giovannie Battista Meneghini: The couple were married from 1949 to 1959. They met when she began to succeed in Italy as an opera singer. Giovanni was an older man and quite rich - an industrialist. He took control of her career, gave her love and career support - at least at the beginning, and sent her off to South America, but denied her a child she wanted. In fact, their marriage might not have been sexual. During their marriage, Maria went by the name Maria Megneghini Callas.  

Married in a traditional way, to Giovannie Battista Meneghini, Maria considered herself her husband's property. He remained in Italy when she began her work in the opera in Argentina in 1951. In Italy, early in her marriage, Maria intended to be something of a homemaker, collecting recipes and setting the table. She wanted a baby but Giovanni said to become pregnant would mean loosing a year of her career. She wanted a baby anyway and was reluctant to continue to sing. Still, the opera singer fulfilled her contracts. 

Hard on herself, Maria didn't like her own voice and dowdy looks. She didn't shave her legs. She walked without gracefulness. Her weight continued to be an issue. 

On top of all that self-loathing were the selfish manipulations of her mother and sister. Her mother was typically unsympathetic, accusing her of not caring about her own family. They said she owed the public. Maria's mother continued to emotionally abuse her, claiming that Maria owed it to her to give her "joy." Her father worked various jobs and was accused of being a lay-about by her mother but Maria ignored his faults while her mother hammered the point that he was a good-for-nothing. Then there was her mother's illness and lack of any health insurance. While her parents remained married in name only, Maria dreaded the idea of actually having to live with either of them again. It's clear that they wanted her to not only have a career, but earn the money to support them, and didn't care about what would give her personal joy. Mother wanted a monthly allowance but Maria gave gifts and repaid loans. Mother wanted Maria to buy them a house and upgrade their lifestyle. Her sister's demands added to the pressure. Marie was emotionally blackmailed by her family. She thought her mother was still able to earn herself a living, if only she chose to.

In 1950, Mexico City, Maria suffered heart palpitations, breathing issues, sleeplessness, and other ailments. Was it all psychological?  

Maria Callas would give another decade to the marriage and her career but the tangle of divorce may have been initiated because she met the man she considered, in today's way of thinking, as her soul mate, the one she was meant for : Aristotle Onassis, the Greek born, Argentina based multimillionaire who had worked his way up into shipping. A megalomaniac with disturbing ideas about women and how women should be treated, "Aristo" would increasingly become Maria's reason for living as he career declined.

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MARIA CALLAS : WE REVISIT THE GREATEST OPERA SINGER - DIVA and MISTRESS OF SHIPPING MAGNATE ARI ONASSIS

Mistress Manifesto, as a Google Blog, began in 2009 and, before I got up to speed, I chose Maria Callas as my Mistress of the Month. These days I feel that this dynamic woman deserves more and better coverage, especially as actress Angelina Jolie chose to portray her in film. So I will repost a couple items from the past and continue on with the book Cast a Diva by Lyndsy Spence, which will be the primary references for this month's posts.

Maria Callas was a famous and esteemed opera singer, some say the greatest, called The Queen of the Opera during her career, who had a soprano voice and three octave range; She is also known for her dramatic vocal interpretations. She was  born in the United States as an American to Greek immigrant parents but thought of as Greek because of her heritage and because the she went back to Greece with her mother and sister as a pubescent teen and there began her voice training. (Eventually she would give up her American citizenship and become a Greek citizen again while desperate for a divorce.) As a teen, she had entered talent contests and appeared on amateur hours, was made to lie about her age, and borrowed records from the library to imitate other opera singers.

Beyond a stellar career, Maria Callas is known as the Mistress of the Greek shipping magnate Aristotle Onassis, a reportedly fiery relationship. Did she want to marry Ari? I've always heard that to be true and it's something we will certainly explore. Onassis was married, divorced, and went on to marry the ultimate prize perhaps, the widow Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy, wife of the assassinated United States President, John Fitzgerald Kennedy, though they divorced famously as well. Maria had also been married, to an older man who took advantage of her and had been divorced. Maria was Onassis' mistress before and, other books have stated, during his marriage with Jackie. 

Cast a Diva - The Hidden Life of Maria Callas by Lyndsy Spence, is not the first book I found interesting by author Spence. She also wrote a book about Doris Delevingne called The Mistress of Mayfair, which I reference here when I elected Doris to be Mistress of the Month in August of 2018. This month however, I will be posting based on chapters as I'm listening to the audiobook while also taking notes. Cast a Diva is reviewed on various book sites on the Internet as presenting Callas as a feminist icon; wonder if I will agree with that notion? That said, Maria Callas has also been associated with tragedy - personally and publicly.

Image from Wikimedia

I think Maria Callas was distinctively beautiful.

MARIA CALLAS

Maria Cecelia Sophia Anna Kalogeropoulos

1923 (New York) - 1977 (Paris)

The early years of the life of Maria Callas were not easy or simple and had a profound effect on her psychology. Her parents were Greek immigrants to New York City in 1923. Maria's pharmacist father had career difficulties as an immigrant and her parents did not get along. It's suggested that her father was a womanizer or that her mother, "Litsa" thought herself and her family to be above his in status. Maria's mother decided that her two daughters were essential to her survival and the three of them went back to Greece in 1937, basically ditching her husband and their father. So Maria had little to no parenting by her father from that point. Her husband, Giovanni Battista Memeghini was an older man, and so was Aristotle Onassis. I can't help but wonder if she was vulnerable to older men because her father was so distant.

Maria's mother was emotionally abusive to her and there were serious questions about her mental health with suggestions that she was unstable, a narcissist, had borderline personality disorder or even schizophrenia. A brother had died and her mother wanted another son so Maria was an unwanted daughter. Maria had an older sister, Yakinthi, and their mother forced the girl into a relationship with a man, to become a Mistress to someone who would not only Keep her but financially help the whole family. This man supported all three of them for some time. This sacrifice on her sister's part also lead to a tangled and difficult relationship between Maria and her sister. With career success, Maria Callas found herself supporting her mother, and contributing to the support of her father and sister as well. They cared little for her personal happiness.

It could be said also that Maria's mother believed in her and promoted her as a child and had the ambition that Maria would someday support them all and free her sister from a dutiful pairing. Mother recognized that her daughter, Maria, had exceptional singing talent. Her mother begged for singing lessons for Maria, demanded she give her all to practice, and she allowed Maria to go without any education past about the eighth grade. No doubt in my mind is that this lack of education and constant focus on vocal training instead of academics was part of the deep insecurity Maria felt. In 1939 Maria Callas began to study at the Athens Conservatory and the perfectionist Maria had a fabulous career for some time.

Perhaps though, it was Maria's weight, along with the fraught relationships she had with her mother and sister, that caused the Opera Diva even more emotional issues as a young woman. The Diva was self-conscious of her myopia and acne, and it's said that she only felt loved while singing. Yet, Maria tapped into her wild range of emotions and feelings as an opera singer, and was unafraid of having an "ugly" voice if it was appropriate for the mood of a song. It was her ability to interpret the drama of a scene that, along with her exceptional voice, brought the audiences to tears and ovations. She said she wanted her voice to reflect "the atmosphere and thousands of colors."

Maria Callas married a rich industrialist, Giovanni Battista Meneghini, and was married for a decade from 1949-1959 to this husband who acted as her agent and manager. The Italian divorce laws at the time would make it near impossible for her to escape this marriage and this man's machinations. Like her family, in particular her mother, he proved to be only interested in her career and the fame and money that could buy them a good life.

There was Maria and then there was Callas, a private woman and a celebrity. She disagreed with feminism and the end of gender roles. "I failed to fulfill myself as a woman" she said, referring to her desire to have a child never fulfilled. 

During this month, I will not focus on the details of Maria Callas' opera career, though I realize that many a opera fan or Maria Callas fan is interested in those details. I assure you that the book does follow her career closely. For our purposes here, we want to focus on her relationships with men, and how it is that she chose to remain faithful to the unfaithful Aristotle Onassis. How is it that she was considered his mistress?  Was it simply because he would not marry her?  Because she clearly could support herself well but he was richer? Was it his attitudes towards women in general, which most modern women would find to be revolting? Her relationship with Aristotle Onassis, whom she called "Aristo" was an extreme example of emotional and psychological abuse and domestic violence. Years went on in which an Italian divorce was not granted. Both Aristo and Maria at times lied to the press that they would marry and then claimed they were joking.

Maria Callas died at the age of fifty-three after a life typified by the highest highs and lowest lows. It's quite possible that using a certain drug illegally - though is some parts of the world it was legal - meant a slow suicide. She had withdrawn into her apartment, was estranged from her family and husband, and after her death her mother, sister, and husband would split her clothing and furniture among themselves.

Stick with me as we learn together about the life of this stellar personality and talent, through the vision of author Lyndsy Spence!

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THE SECRET LIFE OF THE SAVOY by OLIVIA WILLIAMS : MISTRESS MANIFESTO BOOK REVIEW

 

If you love reading MISTRESS MANIFESTO, you will love this book!  

The very private D'Oyly family were overall very good to their trusted staff but had little to say to the press. They preferred that those who stayed at The Savoy popularize it. The hotel was the stage for much drama and many affairs. The family ran their hotel from the 1880's, when it opened, until the 1980s, resisting conformity as hotels became more standardized. They liked who they liked and so they made some accommodation for the artists they enjoyed who couldn't afford what the rich could. 

The book opens with a subject of interest here, the subject of Marguarite Alibert in January 2019 when "Parisian courtesan Marguerite Fahmy, who had married Prince Ali Kamel Fahmy, a playboy a decade younger than she, shot him and went on trial for murder. The couple had made a spectacle of themselves at clubs around town because of their loud arguments and perpetrating domestic violence on each other in public. On a hot July night, wearing a white satin and beaded cocktail gown designed for her by Coco Chanel, Marguerite shot Ali three times with a Browing semi-automatic. (Pages2- 3) She shot him in the head, neck, and back.  He died. The trial revealed some sordid details to the public who followed it with great interest. Her lawyer called Marguerite's husband, Ali,'a monster of Eastern depravity and decadence, whose sexual tastes were indicative of an amoral sadism' and called her a "Helpless European wife." (Page 5) She turned up in court sparkling, wearing her finest jewelry, and was acquitted.  She lived into old age at Place Vendome, opposite the Ritz in Paris.

Apparently the publicity that the trial engendered made the Savoy more popular than ever. 

New Money and the Greek shipping tycoons  Cosas Lemos, Aristotle Onassis, and Stavros Niarchos are also mentioned in the book.  The men were competing and while the other two men stayed elsewhere when in London Onassis stayed at the Savoy.

According to the author, Olivia Williams, Onassis was often there smoking cigars with his friend Winston Churchill whose son, Randolph who often sailed with Onassis on the Christina, had introduced his father to....   

"... an incident on board in 1963, in which Randolph 'erupted like Stromboli shouting abuse at his aged father.  Randolph accused him of having connived with his first wife, Pamela, to whom Winston was very close, to conceal her affair with Averell Harriman 48th Governor of New York.'  Onassis and Churchill became so close, however, that society was stunned within Churchill invited him to become a member of The Other Club at the Savoy. (Page 253)

Stavos Niarchos was possibly able to have a say about how the hotel was run. Pamela Churchill had accepted Randolph's proposal of marriage, though he had been on a 'proposal binge' on their first date and had married him and became pregnant on her wedding night, thus producing an heir. Randolph cold not stop his drinking or womanizing and soon he and Pamela were having affairs. (Page 255)

Pamela, leaving Randolph had gone off to Claridges, another famous hotel, where she found herself attracted to William Paley, the owner of the CBS television network, and then also Edward Murrow, a popular news anchor in the United States. However, she set her signs on Niarchos, who was married. Onassis considered Niarchos an enemy and tried to befriend Randolph to side against him and Pamela. But Onassis and Niarchos had something in common and that is that they had married sisters and Onassis'' first wife, Athina, divorced from him, married Niarchos

If it interests you, check into the archives to summon up posts on the following subjects which intertwine with the people mentioned in this book.

MARGUERITE ALIBERT - SEX WORKER, COURTESAN, MISTRESS, WIFE - HER MEN and the PRINCE OF WALES  : HIS LOVE LETTERS MAY HAVE SHIELDED HER FROM THE LAW in January 2019 

MARIA CALLAS OPERA DIVA and MISTRESS OF ARI ONASSIS : MISTRESS OF THE MONTH August 2010

NICKY T. : THE OBSCURE BELGIAN ESCORT and MISTRESS WHO BROKE ATHINA ONASSIS ELEVEN YEAR MARRIAGE and "GABY" LANDHAGE the MISTRESS WHO MARRIED ATHINA'S FATHER and RAISED HER    May 2020

PAMELA CHURCHILL:

PAMELA DIGBY CHURCHILL HARRIMAN - DUMPY DEBUTANTE TO AMBASSADOR TO FRANCE:  March 2019 and April 2019

Missy

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THE LONGINES ATHINA ONASSIS HORSE SHOW FEATURES SIGNIFICANT PRIZE MONEY

ATHINA ONASSIS HORSE SHOW OFFICIAL SITE

EXCERPT:  The Longines Athina Onassis Horse Show will include two different levels of competition for professional and amateur riders for a total of 617,000 pounds in prize money.  Six CSI5 classes will host the best ho9rse and rider combination in the world, all aiming for points toward the Longines Rankings.  Among these; the Longines Global Champions Gran PRix, with 300,000 in prize money, and the Global Champions League team competition, where top riders from various countries compete together in high stakes, multi round events around the world.


I
Athina has established her own Equestrian Events - https://www.athinaonassis-horseshow.com/ and that she is friendly with Charlotte Casiraghi of Monaco: rumors that Monaco was saved financially by Ari Onassis persist.  Clearly the offspring of the men who were once in business together and who ended their business relationship aren't holding any grudges.

DO YOU HAVE A PRE-MISTRESSING FINANCIAL AGREEMENT?

Thomas Jefferson and Sally Hemings had a pre-mistressing verbal agreement witnessed in Paris by her brother.  Pregnant in Paris, where she and her brother who were there with Jefferson could have walked away and lived in freedom from slavery, he promised the teenager that if she came back with him to the United States - Virginia - Monticello - that he would free their children once they became adults - and he did.  At that time, in my opinion, Sally was both vulnerable and at the height of her negotiating power.  (I believe modern women are generally at the height of their negotiating power with a man before they move in with him and I think a Mistress should keep her own residence.) But his willingness to make this deal communicated that he saw them having a future together and that she trusted him.


There is such a thing as a pre-nup, and there has been among the wealthier people for some time.  For instance, before Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy married Aristotle Onassis, there were negotiations of how much she could spend a year and how much she would get for each year of marriage should they divorce. Though controversial when he died without completing a divorce from her, Onassis, his lawyers, Ted Kennedy - the brother of her deceased husband President John F. Kennedy, and her lawyers are all rumored, depending on what book about them you read, to have taken part in these negotiations as a legal financial understanding before the wedding.  In some cultures such discussions could be called "bride price" or while a "dowry" is the money that a woman brought into a marriage with her; many poor women without a dowry were unmarriageable.


If you are a Mistress, or contemplating accepting a man's offer to be Kept by him, I strongly suggest you do negotiate, but it feels tacky to many and not romantic.


DO YOU HAVE A PRE-MISTRESSING FINANCIAL AGREEMENT?

IS MONTE CARLO THE PLACE TO FIND MISTRESSES?

I've been reading about MONTE CARLO - and MONACO where it is - and I'm convinced it might be one of the best places on earth for mistresses...

NOTE: 2020 : This is one of the early posts I made a decade ago before I got into the more magazine type format that features a subject or person each month.

Besides Monte Carlo being a part of the Ari Onassis story, and posts on Ari, his Mistress Maria Callas, and so on,  in January 2015 I did a month entitled THE GRIMALDI CURSE and the Mistresses of the Princes of Monaco.  You can find it in the archive of this blog.