SO GENEROUS

There are five boxes here.  Imagine what gift you would want in each box. The gifts don't have to be from one person.  These might be gifts you would give someone else...  The gifts do not have to be material objects.  These five things could be the characteristics you most want to have yourself, or the characteristics you most want from a partner in life...  Use your imagination! What is most important to you?

TWO SUGARS FOR TEA

 

WHAT'S IT LIKE TO BECOME A SUGAR BABY?

Let's explore Sugar Relationships!   Elena used a website called Seeking in order to find the right Sugar Daddy.  *Seeking is the new name for Seeking Arrangements.

MEDIUM - ELENA BATEMAN : I BECAME A SUGAR BABY FOR A WEEK

Excerpts: "Now, if you don’t know what a sugar baby is: let me explain. A sugar baby is someone, usually a younger person, that enters into a consensual and adult arrangement with an older person. This older person, typically a man (a sugar daddy), is incredibly wealthy and provides financial aid to said sugar baby in return for companionship. For example, a sugar daddy may give a monthly ‘allowance’, they may pay for rent. Sometimes there may be sexual elements to these arrangements, and sometimes there are not, but these arrangements are very clear to never advertise sex as a condition for financial reward. ...

I had to submit my passport to prove that the images were mine and after a few days, my pictures were approved. It did make me curious as to if similar image and identity verification checks are done on the sugar daddy side of the site. Do they have to prove their income? After all, if sugar babies have to be verified as authentic — shouldn’t the income and identity of the people they’re matching with be too? ...

For a basic sugar daddy profile on the site, there is no verification of income — you can make a profile and input the most ludicrous income possible with no issues. This not only encourages a huge amount of counterfeit ‘rich’ people on the site but potentially puts the sugar babies at risk of being scammed or harmed by people looking to exploit them. ..."

Three weeks into the experience here are the offers Elena got.  (I want you to ask yourself if this is different, and how, than escorting.)

1) For every dinner date that I and this gentleman went on, he was going to give me 300 pounds, including dinner at any restaurant I wanted.

2) A long term arrangement, that would give me 900 pounds as an allowance each month in return for 2 or 3 meet-ups for dinner dates.

3) A man offered to pay my rent (500 pounds) for several meet-ups a month.

4) Another offered to help with university tuition (which the government is currently hooking me up with but the idea of no student loan debt was looking very juicy at this moment.) He didn't say how many meet-ups he would like for this, ut it was to be a long-term arrangement.

5) One man even offered me to come and stay on a weekend away with him whilst he was working away from his home country. Return flights and stay in a five- star hotel for the whole weekend.  He would pay for absolutely everything, as well as give me 1000 pounds spending money for the weekend.

****

Missy here.... 

My take on this is that it sounds like these men were making their offers or revealing the financial investment they were willing to make without actually meeting her or getting to know if they were companionable first.  If you are a man who wants to be a Sugar Daddy, I strongly suggest that you do meet and spend some time with the woman first before mentioning the financial help or gifts you wish to give a Sugar Baby, especially if you imagine a long-term arrangement.

PEPPERMINT

 

SUGAR BABY? SUGAR DADDY? : PLAYING IN THE FANTASY

Some people think being a Kept Person is all about being spoiled. Some people assume Mistresses are all poor women who have luxury conferred upon them by rich men. It is not always so. There are many ways to love and many ways to have an alternative relationship.  Sometimes there is no extra money at all. This blog explores the many ways. But I think the financial aspects of alternative relationships is something that goes less commented upon, even when we find examples in the memoirs, biographies, and other non-fiction books that I excerpt from.

Some of you, my readers, may have already had the experience of being a Sugar Baby, or a Sugar Mamma or Daddy. But others only think about or hope for a relationship in which the other person is generous. Where the other person has more than you do to share financially.  Where the other person is going to make your life a bit easier. Where you feel no guilt or a sense that you have to pay them back because they truly want to do this for you and can -no sweat!

When is the last time you were invited out to a restaurant and did not feel you had to pitch in - at least for the tip? Or buy the dessert?  How did you feel about it when someone else chose the restaurant and you found out that they did not want to treat you, but wanted you to split the bill?  Do you feel comfortable with accepting an expensive gift?

Let's play in that fantasy!

Missy

SUGAR DADDY NOT JUST ABOUT SEX

NY POST: SUGAR DADDY RELATIONSHIP NOT JUST ABOUT SEX by Hannah Frishberg
What a fascinating article.  Be sure to go to the link and read the whole thing.

Excerpts:  Research now finds there are actually seven types of sugar daddy-baby relationships, from the purely sex for money types to the totally platonic.  The study,published last month in the journal Sociological Perspectives, interviewed 48 current and former US sugar babies found through Craigslist, Backpage, and at the 2016 annual Sugar Baby Summit in LA.  ...


DO YOU HAVE A SUGAR FRIENDSHIP?

DO I HAVE TO DECIDE RIGHT NOW?

HOW TO PICK AND CHOOSE A MAN (IF YOU MUST)! :OPINION BY MISSY

QUESTION FOR MISSY

Dear Missy,

I'm 25 and working as a model.  I have aspirations to be in film.  I live a bi-coastal life.  I make enough money to afford an apartment in New York (with a room mate) and another in Los Angeles (without a room mate).  I travel to model, mostly in the United States.

In New York I have a Sugar Daddy who has been wonderful to me for the last five years. I care for him deeply.  He is unmarried, but he is much older than me.

However, there is another man in Los Angeles who is probably more appropriate for me.  I mean he's closer to my age and we have more in common and are very very attracted to each other.  He's in film. He's married and has made it clear to me that he has no plans to leave his wife and two young children. I'm not in either city that much.  I don't want to marry anyone right now.

What do you think about me having two Sugar Daddy's, one in each coast?

Kelly from Chicago

ANSWER FROM MISSY


Dear Kelly from Chicago,

You mean keep them both?
Certainly men have kept more than one woman in their lives at a time. 

Consider.  First, how good are you at keeping two relationships that have limits going?  You might try it and find yourself unfocused and confused or loose them both.  You might be very good at it since as is you are in and out of town and able to be independent.  It's not for everyone. 

Second, what does each man expect of you when it comes to spending time together and your availability? How often is Sugar Daddy in New York used to seeing you?

A Sugar Daddy may be in love with you, or be the Sugar Daddy to a number of models. 

If there is little to no time to spend, then you may not actually be developing a relationship with the person.  Your New York Sugar Daddy may be very sure of you in his life and may not be as philosophical about you being young and ambitious and on the verge of leaving him.  Are you afraid to break his heart? To loose the benefits he gives you?  I bet you don't want to hurt him, when he has been so kind and generous to you.

Models and actresses meet more men than most women and can often have their pick. So don't feel like you have to pick right now, or settle.  Check in with your feelings. Admit what you want to yourself. Are you trying to have everything (and everyone) your way? Are you ready to say goodbye to Sugar Daddy in New York for good?  And if you do, and the relationship with Mr. Film in Los Angeles ends, then what?

I think you will be meeting more men who are attractive and more men who are willing to mentor you or be your patron and help you move towards greater success.  You can't get lazy about it though.  You still have to show up for auditions and assignments and, if you get movie roles, you'll have to be gone for days or weeks at a time on set.  You can't put your career on hold and be totally available to any man at this point and that is probably very attractive to them.  At the same time you probably haven't spent as much time with Mr. Film in Los Angeles and are guessing at the potential of the relationship. 

Like you I'm speculating.

At the heart of my advice is, always be truthful with yourself, in touch with what you're feeling and thinking.

Missy

ERTHA KITT : SANTA BABY (Hurry Down the Chimney Tonight!)