EATING DISORDER HOTLINES : IT TAKES BRAVERY TO MAKE THAT FIRST PHONE CALL

IF YOU THINK YOU MIGHT HAVE AN EATING DISORDER. Here's a start:

EATING DISORDER HOTLINES

When you look in the mirror, do you see yourself as you are, or imagine you're too fat?

TALKING TILL SUNRISE : DOMESTIC VIOLENCE and SUICIDE and EATING DISORDERS : SOME PHONE NUMBERS FOR YOU IF YOU NEED THEM!

This month's posts have reminded me that Domestic Violence is not restricted to the poor, as is stereotyped, and that Suicide is not the way to solve emotional and psychological pain.  I want you, my readers, to be as healthy in body and mind as one can be. So I'm going to offer a couple phone numbers that may be the first step to improving your life if you are suffering. Though I don't personally deal with Domestic Violence and have never been Suicidal, friends of mine have been. I'm not making light of these issues at all.

Yes, I've talked on the phone for many hours with a friend who was depressed and in therapy and mostly it was all over a man, a man who was actually a good man but simply working on his PhD. and had little time for women in general, but was just not that interested in her. They were not having an affair. Not yet, anyway. She was obsessed with him and had developed quite a fantasy about what might happen in their relationship simply because they went for coffee and held hands on a walk. I stayed on the phone with her - long distance - until the sun rose and she could call her therapist for an emergency appointment.

We live and learn. All these years later, I have more knowledge and experience, and think I would probably deal with women friends who were in relationships that would never make them happy a bit differently. I never played therapist and suggesting therapy to another person took a long time for me to do. I still think that having a confidant or two is important and that loyalty and faithfulness in friendships is so important. However, sometimes as a close personal friend it takes you a while to realize that your friend who is in such pain needs someone to talk to who has a professional perspective.

I recently met a young woman who told me that talking about your personal life or problems to strangers made it obvious to her that a person needed to be in therapy. I do not agree with that. Sometimes disclosure and sharing are exactly how people bond and find out they have some things in common. (I also found out later that this particular young woman had serious problems such as drug addiction, a petty criminal record, and so on, so she was intensely in to therapy.) No, a therapist is not a friend!  They are paid professionals with education and experience in the field of psychology. A psychiatrist is a medical doctor who can prescribe medications. Usually a person sees a therapist first.  (And if you're in therapy and it's not helping, you may need to switch to a different one.) With a friend I'm not able to be objective like a professional might be.

Understanding what is or is not abuse or violence is important just as understanding what is or is not depression rather than just a bad mood or sadness.  

If you find yourself in a relationship or circumstances like Maria Callas did, well, this is 2024 and you don't have to be tortured like Maria. 

988 is the designated number to go right to SUICIDE PREVENTION and CRISIS HOTLINE - and you can SMS (text) with them too. The previous 988 Lifeline phone number 800-273-8255 will always remain available to people in emotional distress or suicidal crisis.

https://988lifeline.org/current-events/the-lifeline-and-988/

And then there's the NATIONAL DOMESTIC VIOLENCE HOTLINE

Hours: 24/7. Languages: English, Spanish and 200+ through interpretation service 

800-799-7233  SMS: (Text) BEGIN to 88788

https://www.thehotline.org/

I suspect that Maria Callas had an eating disorder.

National Association of Anorexia Nervosa & Associated Disorders (ANAD): The Helpline 888-375-7767 is open Monday to Friday.

Missy

NATIONAL DOMESTIC ABUSE HOTLINE

NATIONAL DOMESTIC ABUSE HOTLINE 

800-799-7233

I've run this number before and to honor Gabby Petito. the young woman who may have been murdered while in a relationship that included Domestic Violence, I'm running it again. 

You might also want to click on tabs below and see where else in this blog I've blogged about DOMESTIC VIOLENCE.  You might want to read about Bernie Tiedi, for instance. 

You can call this number out of concern for someone else as well and they promise the person you talk to will not be judgmental.

This blog stands for CHOICE which can sometimes be a Privilege. 

I think just about anyone can find themselves in a relationship that becomes abusive, sometimes from the start, sometimes over many years.  Not everyone who is in a relationship that has abuse in it realizes it right away.  Notions such as that abuse is always physical may prevent a person from realizing that they are in an abusive relationship.  Abuse can go both ways as well and is not always men abusing women. 

Sometimes something as simple as couple's counseling can make a big difference.  It may help to be in a therapist's office where both people can speak their truth. 

Sometimes a person may need to be clever in order to get out of an abusive situation. 

Covid shut downs put pressure on some relationships as has the overall economic situation in the United States and other countries.

Check in with yourself frequently and ask yourself how you feel about other people in your life.

Recently I've been watching YouTube videos about Narcissism. I've learned that several people who I had in my friendship circle through the years have this personality disorder.

If you grew up as an abused child, you may think abuse in an adult relationship is normal and not a problem.  

I'm often asked if Mistresses are all in relationships that are abusive.  My answer is no, not all. You do not have to be a person with a deficit in self esteem to be Kept or in a relationship that cannot move towards legal marriage.  Ideally everyone involved is honest with themselves and others so that adult decisions can be made. Marriage is not for everyone, nor is monogamy, and many people have more than one person to love at a time in their lives, though the pressure to conform to societal expectations can drive people to keep a secret of a relationship.  

Remember that it's common to idealize another person when in the first stage of a relationship. Eventually we must decide if we want to continue with a person who does not meet our expectations. How realistic are our expectations?  That answer may be very different based on a number of factors such as your age, employment and education, and history of relationships.

If you know or suspect your relationship is harming you in some way, try to get more information.

If you arrived at this site by cell phone or home computer, you may want to erase the history so that someone else who can have access to your phone or computer does not know you have this number. Write down the number and keep it elsewhere. I know phone booths are rare but there may be other places that you can make phone calls out without being tracked.

LOVING THE ONE YOU'RE WITH INCLUDES LOVING YOURSELF.

Missy

TRAINED ADVOCATES at the NATIONAL DOMESTIC ABUSE HOTLINE CAN HELP

THE HOTLINE ORG - NATIONAL DOMESTIC ABUSE HOTLINE

1-800-799-SAFE

TRAINED ADVOCATES, COMPASSIONATE, CONFIDENTIAL.

BE A SURVIVOR!

If you find yourself abusing others or being abused, calling this number may be the first step towards change.