IDEALS and REALITY : DECLARATION FOR MISTRESSES

"I will not confuse my ideals and my reality."  

C 2009  Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot First Published November 14,2009

CULTURED CARNATIONS

from Library of Congress

American Carnation Culture (1892)

ENOUGH OF USING E-COMMUNICATIONS and OUTING OTHERS TO BREAK UP : IT'S NASTY IT'S REVENGE and HAS NO PLACE IN ROMANCE

A recent expose of people using e-media such as e-mail and texting to break up or, going low-tech by posting handwritten or banner signage on their lawns to let all the neighbors know, which then made it onto the Internet, had me cringing.

All these people were nasty and revengeful. While they maybe did not know better, I think they all knew what they were doing at the time - but did not consider the consequences. They thought they were outing the person who hurt them but they were also outing themselves. They were letting the world know they are losers at love and mean-spirited.  

A person might be the one in the right, but as soon as the sign is posted everyone will be thinking or saying "It takes two." 

Do your neighbors want to get involved?  They may love gossip and have nothing better to do than spread it, but most people really do not. 

Does someone else want to be partnered with someone so nasty and revengeful?  No!

I realize that most of these people were in emotional pain when they did what they did, but they no longer have any privacy. There is little chance after stunts like this to perhaps resolve the issues and make the relationship better. 

It's horrible for children to deal with. Now children at school will be talking about the sign on the lawn and asking the child of revenge seeking parents about their parent's relationship or making comments. 

As for using text to develop a relationship or to break up. STOP THAT NOW!

Text should only be used when you cannot phone call and phone call should only be used when you can't talk in person. 

This is a person who has shared your life, who you have been intimate with, and if you don't get that and can't be sensitive, I can't feel sorry for you.

If you have been dating, perhaps not exclusively, but it's been several months, and you know the other person has strong feelings for you developing, even if you have not had sex, you should break up with them in person. 

Here are some guide lines.

If you have been married, engaged officially, or have been steadily dating after having a commitment discussion, or you have had sex, a break up absolutely must be done in person. The other person deserves that respect. 

Do you have to give details such as why you are breaking up?  Sometimes it is kinder not to. Forget "Cruel to be kind." That is hostility.  Should you give details about the "other woman" or "other man?"  That you are no longer in love or no longer want the partnership is more than enough. Will the person ask?  Probably.  What is the least hurtful response? I would say you can skip the details until or if it becomes important later.

What if that "other woman" is pregnant and you want a quick unpartnering because you intend to partner (or marry) that person in order to be a father to that child. I think that your current partner needs to know this is true. Your future does not just include another woman who you may or may not marry or be with a long time but also a child who is a responsibility for the next eighteen years or more and might become a half-sibling.

When it comes to that you want or need to break with someone because of a habit or a drastic difference world view, you have to ask yourself if you think the reason is something the other person could change. If they could change it why are you not giving them the chance to? Are you willing to change also?

If you dated a little, no sex, but you're calling time on the developing relationship, make a phone call. Don't ghost this person. A phone call will suffice.  They deserve to know you are moving on so they won't waste time wondering. 

Missy

C 2025 Mistress Manifesto - BlogSpot  All Rights Reserved including Internet and International Rights.

STANDOUT

NICOLE COSTE and CHARLENE WITTSOCK'S RELATIONSHIP BEFORE PRINCE ALBERT II "THE PLAYBOY PRINCE" MARRIED CHARLENE? NICOLE COMPLAINS TO THE MEDIA IN 2014.

Although it's certain that Albert II of Monaco and Nicole Coste had a relationship, as their son Alexandre, born in August 2003 has proven, exactly how the Prince was proceeding with Charlene Wittstock is not known.

Albert met Nicole in 1997. 

He and Charlene met in 2000 in Monaco where Charlene was in a swimming competition, and their engagement was announced by the palace June, 2010. They were married in July 2011. So we can figure that the Prince had both women in his life, in some way, for at least a couple years before the birth of Alexandre, and continuing on.

Were the two women rivals for the Prince for some time? Truthfully we do not know that. But we do wonder.... Since we know here at Mistress Manifesto that adultery is not required to have or be a Mistress, it is actually a question of when Albert had Nicole as a Mistress AND when he had Charlene as a Mistress.

Tricky, because it's implied that being a Mistress has to do with a man providing financial advantages to a woman who may have her own work or career.  Due to his fabulous wealth, no doubt he made Nicole's life easier, and as for Charlene, I would say yes he did.

However, in April of 2005, Prince Rainier, Albert's father died, and he was the heir to the throne, which he formally took to in July of 2005. He admitted to having a two year old son.  (He had also admitted to having a daughter as the result of an affair previously.) 

DAILY MAIL :PRINCE ALBERT NOT SEEING SON SINCE MARRYING PRINCESS CHARLENE? by Alexis Parr for Mailonline  published in April 2014

In this article it is stated that Nicole and Albert had a six year relationship.

Excerpt:

In an exclusive interview with The Mail on Sunday, Nicole, who has fought hard - but unsuccessfully - for Alexandre to be recognized as a prince, tells how she was shunned by Monaco society and left to explain to her tearful son why his father no longer sees him.

'The truth is that, I'm sorry to say, Albert hasn't seen Alexandre since a brief visit last September.  It has become impossible since he married that girl,' she says referring to Charlene, 36. 'I suppose as a new wife, how would one feel? But she should think about my innocent child.  I don't want to attack her but I think it is just jealousy and I don't know why.  I have been through hell in my fight for my son's name and future.'

Understandably loath to go into the detail about her son's distress, Nicole leaves it to a close confidante to explain how the distance has affected her son. 'Alexandre misses his daddy dreadfully,' the friend says. 'He has started to feel sad and rejected. He asks, "Why can't I see Daddy?" He has to be told that his father is busy.'

C 2025 Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot  All Rights Reserved including Internet and International Rights

ALEXANDRE COSTE SPEAKS ABOUT HIS STATUS AND PARENTS - NICOLE COSTE and PRINCE ALBERT II OF MONACO

PEOPLE : ALEXANDRE GRIMALDI by Stephanie Petit  from August 2023

Excerpt:  

Alexandre also spoke about using the last name Grimaldi with his father's encouragement.

"My father's name is Grimaldi. It makes sense that I bear his name. I would have been called Dochomel if my father had been Mr. Dochemel!" Alexandre said. "Besides, I never called myself Coste or Coste-Grimaldi. On no ID, at school or on my diplomas. Those who call me that have a malicious attitude."

"My mother is tender by nature and let a lot of things be said because she was always advised to 'let the story go,' he continued. "Me, I will be more procedural because I was born in France, but I grew up in an Anglo-Saxon country. I'll attack if necessary."

"Nor am I 'illegitimate' since when I was born, neither of my parents was in another marriage, and they did not commit adultery. Using that word is insulting!  I hope no one believes the lies conveyed on the internet. One bears the name of one's father when one has been recognized since birth. I had voluntary recognition from my father when I was a baby. Not from a judge or the press who have forced him to," Prince Albert's son said. "My mother, whom I adore, is my rock, and she is not jealous at all of my choice. If she never said anything about my surname, it's been to protect our privacy....."

Missy here : When I read this, I feel that the recently adult and fairly-well-kept out of the press, Alexandre Grimaldi, who was born as Eric Alexandre Stephane Tossoiukpe on August 24, 2003 in Paris, was feeling defensive and trying to get his side of the story out to the world.  

I agree that neither of his parents were officially married to others at the time and were thus not officially committing adultery. However, adultery is not the deciding factor. Being recognized is not enough to be legitimate. Legitimate and illegitimate are legal terms: if your parents were not married at the time of your birth you are illegitimate. Inheritance is often tied into this. When he is talking about his mother, Nicole Coste, not being jealous of his choice, he means his choice to use the Grimaldi surname. His own mother changed her surname to Coste and called him Alexandre Coste. (Still no legal Grimaldi surname.)

Prince Albert II lives with restrictions to his choices tied in with his role as head of state of Monaco, a tiny but incredibly wealth country. Whatever his relationship with the mother of his oldest son is today, whatever wealth or prestige he chooses to share with Alexandre and Nicole, individually or separately, he has never been married to Nicole and his recognizing Alexandre as his natural son is not even the same as legally adopted him.

As a note, in more recent times both Alexandre and Nicole say they have a much better relationship with Prince Albert than they had previously complained about. Alexandre is becoming an adult and living his own life. It is harder to do that on the world stage and my hope for him is that he will find his niche and be a productive and positively influential individual.

Missy

C 2025 Mistress Manifesto - BlogSpot  All Rights including Internet and International Rights

CARNATION : THE NATIONAL FLOWER OF MONACO

The carnation is the national flower of Monaco.

 

NICOLE COSTE : PRINCE ALBERT II IS RUMORED TO HAVE BEEN BANNED FROM MARRYING HER BY HIS FATHER : HER LOVE CHILD WITH THE PRINCE IS ACCEPTED AND REACHES ADULTHOOD

Back in September 2010, I elected NICOLE COSTE as Mistress of the Month. It's time to update ourselves on this beautiful African woman who, as Mistress of Prince Albert II of Monaco, is rumored to have wanted to marry back in the day before he did marry his forever wife, Princess Charlene. The son of Nicole and Albert, Alexandre, has been featured in more recent magazine and news stories as reaching adulthood as an accepted member of Prince Albert's family. It's not easy to sort through media and know for sure what's true and what is not about these relationships. For instance, I'm skeptical of the stories that Princess Charlene, Prince Albert II's wife, tried to flee her wedding and I dislike the misinterpretation of her emotional tears at the wedding as negative. But Charlene did go to Africa in recent years and stay there for a suspiciously long time, and then after a return to Monaco, entered a Swiss clinic. People do wonder at the status of Charlene's marriage to Albert and if Albert persists in faithfulness and loyalty to Charlene.

Let's start with the posts from 2010 and I'll add the updates.

- Missy

Here's what I posted in September 2010:

Nicole Valérie Tossoukpé, now called NICOLE COSTE, was a flight attendant from the African country of Togo when worldly Prince Albert of Monaco met her, and things were so good between them that Albert, who some say has outdone Mick Jagger when it comes to the numbers of women he has had, decided to set her up in Paris as his mistress. A few years into it, the couple had a son, Alexandre. Albert wanted to marry Nicole but his father said no...***

Now, I looked around the net for information and picture on NICOLE COSTE, and I'm linking to this one (click on the title above); it has some great pictures of the couple together and Albert with his son as well as strong suggestions that Monaco look no further for it's heir. Yes, there are some who want little Alexandre to become the heir to the throne and I know - Albert is marrying Charlene  - sometime in July 2011 - but this is MISTRESS MANIFESTO BLOGSPOT!

Just a few months ago Nicole emerged at Cannes...

C 2010-2015 Mistress Manifesto First published September 1, 2010

 

NICOLE COSTE BRINGS FORTH HER CHARITY 2010!

Miss Afrique 2010, first beauty contest of its kind on African soil ... NICOLE CONTE is busy, looking terrific, and doing something important with her life! The contest was partially sponsored by Nicole's charity...

*** In 2025 I still hear and read this.

NICOLE VALERIE COSTE

Nicole Valérie Tossoukpé

1971- present

She legally changed her surname to Coste in November 2004.

She has two sons from a previous marriage.

She and Albert II met on an Air France flight where she served as a 1st Class flight attendant.

This month I will go further with the Nicole Coste story than I did years ago. Although there may once have been talk of marriage, and Nicole has in interviews promoted the idea that the people of Monaco love her and that she could well as a Princess, it is also true that she is accused of having a rivalry with Princess Charlene and possibly the cause of Charlene's distress. She may or may not have had men in her life since Albert but if so, this seems to be a secret. Paris and London figure in her story too, not just Monaco.

If you would like to read past coverage about Monaco, you may want to visit my archives!

January  2015  

The GRIMALDI CURSE and the MISTRESSES OF THE PRINCES OF MONACO

C2010 Mistress Manifesto - BlogSpot  First published September 9, 2010

C2025 Mistress Manifesto - BlogSpot