TYPECAST AS A TRAGIC MIXED- RACE CONCUBINE OR SEDUCTRESS

Vernadette Vicuna Gonzalez ask us not to reduce Isabel to the stereotypes of a tragic mixed-race concubine or seductress. She says this has happened in other books, the books for instance that are part of the YouTube video I posted. To be fair, I think each author tried to envision her and understand her role in General MacArthur's life, as their own gender and time and place and personal limitations allowed. So be it a powerful older man who treats a 'petulant and spoiled' younger woman to tea gowns, kimonos, and black lingerie' or whose existence in his life threatens his career, Gonzalez asks us to look deeper.

(Notes and observations having read pages 2-3)

Did Isabel, lonely and neglected despite being Kept, go out and seduce other men for fun?

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A little time out here:  After so many years reading and researching and writing around the subject of Mistresses here at Mistress Manifesto, the idea that a Mistress is the seductress, the idea that she always ends up in a tragedy, is not new to me. That Isabel Rosario Cooper is portrayed this way is no surprise to me. Implied is that women who have relationships with men who are already married or who do not marry them end up punished in some way, such as being murdered or ending in suicide. You will find several of those women in these pages.

So at this time I want to remind my readers that so much of our perceptions about mistresses come from books and books tend to be about exceptional people and extraordinary situations, of which being a Mistress is one of those. Overall, it's difficult to find information on those mistresses who were not exceptional people in extraordinary situations. That is why I say that the most successful of them may be people we never hear about. There are people who are happy with their station in life, whatever it happens to be, and that includes some wives and mistresses who willingly man share. It is an assumption that every woman wants marriage and a traditional marriage at that. It's also an assumption that a mistress is a kind of prostitute, there for the sex, with a thin veneer of a relationship keeping her and a lover together.

My feeling about Isabel Rosario Cooper so far is that she was likely influenced by coming from the Philippines, which to this day is quite mixed-race and also dominated by Catholic traditionalism. To this day a woman uniting with a much older man is not thought badly of there overall. Some of the women do seek marriage with American men who are older. Rather an older established man who can provide is considered a plus and American men know this. I know of more than one woman of Philippine heritage here in the United States who has, with the approval of her father, been a mistress. One of these women seemed especially servile. I knew that she had also been a mistress to a Hollywood producer previously and that her then-current man had also had mistresses in the past who left the relationship when marriage was not forthcoming. So I hoped this woman was not waiting for him to marry her. By servile I mean that she waited on him, cooking and serving food, and basically acted in-wait to his needs. Consider that if he was not going to marry her, those years she lived her life around him were years in which she was not getting an education or developing a career. 

Missy

CAN THIS COLLEGE PROFESSOR QUALIFY TO HAVE A MISTRESS? : OPINION BY MISSY

QUESTION FOR MISSY:

Hi Missy,

I'm 52 years old and I've hardly ever dated.  I have no children. I'm sending you a picture so you can see what I look like.  I'm your typical college professor, I guess. I'm tenured and make a good income.  I fall in love with students.  But I can't go there.  I was at a conference when I met a grad student who attends another university a couple years into a PhD.  She's 27 years old and she seems interested in me.  I got back from the conference and all I think about is her. It would require a commute. I had lunch with her and then dinner, what a lively conversation! I know she's struggling to afford her education. How does a man qualify to have a Mistress?  That seems to be the perfect solution for me.

Victor


Location Withheld by Missy

To my readers.  Victor's picture reveals him to appear to be a typical college professor.  He's wearing jeans, a nice shirt, no tie, appears to be in good shape for his age, wears a pair of those classic intellectual eyeglasses, has his hair, and a trimmed beard.  He's posed there in front of a tree and has something like a backpack full of books.  I checked the location he gave and there are a number of universities in the area.  I'm withholding his expertise, let's just say this is a very smart man.

ANSWER FROM MISSY:

Victor, first I want you to know that when there is a big age difference you're about to encounter negative voices, but does that stop the Rock God Jimmy Page from partnering with a woman who is old enough to be his grand-daughter, the poet Scarlet?  No it does not. So love is love.

Since you are never married (and I assume the student you are interested in isn't married either) I take it that you are not inclined to marry and that is why you are thinking Mistress instead of a "Girlfriend" to whom you'll be generous.  I figure you are willing to commute to see her and would expect her to see you on breaks.

Tell her the truth.  Tell her you want to have a somewhat long distance relationship with her and will financially provide for her so that she can focus on her education and make it through without also having to work. 

If she accepts, then you have qualified to have a Mistress, even though neither of you may ever apply that term to your relationship.

Do you expect her to be faithful to you on that other campus and in that other town?

Do you yourself expect to only be with her?

This may sound strange, but do you even want to have sex with her?


Figure it out.

Call her and ask her to meet you for dinner. You go there.  Find the kind of place where you can sit and talk for a couple hours without a waiter hovering or expectations that another party will soon occupy the table, possibly with some low volume relaxing music, low lighting.  A comfortable and unpretentious place.  Off campus. Talk about your own education, how you made it through.  Tell her you find her interesting and attractive and wonder if she could ever fall for you.  Tell her you would like to have a relationship that probably won't lead to marriage and then talk about what it's costing her to get through that PhD.  (Another 3 years?) and make your offer.  Maybe I should say first offer.

She may be shocked.

Tell her to think about it.

Proceed to enjoy your meal.

This is open negotiations not close the deal.

Missy

E.S.T.E.A.M stands for Empowering Successful Teens through Education, Awareness and Mentoring : DAWN SCHILLER TURNS HER HARSH EXPERIENCE AROUND TO HELP OTHERS

 

EMPOWERTEENS - and E.S.T.E.A.M

update April 2022.  It appears this link is "suspended."

So I'm offering this link to DAWN who holds a Masters Degree and is and expert

in sex trafficking: DAWN SCHILLER COM - BIO

 

DAWN SCHILLER

DAWN SHILLERS WEB SITE

from publicity photos

on her web site.

 

From EMPOWERTEENS: "To think of images of kids beat down, used or thrown away should break our hearts. What a terrible feeling to be unwanted, not important enough to be asked what you might be thinking or feeling. No one to worry if you are scared or lonely… to offer you safety without strings. We recycle our trash, but consider an unwanted teen unsalvageable. Why? They are our poets, artists, musicians, scholars, athletes, chemists, and thespians. They are worth more than the sky. They are all our children. Let’s embrace them."

 

 

DECLARATION FOR MISTRESSES : Career as a Priority

"My first priority is education and the development of my career, for only the  privileged and lucky are supported from birth to death by someone else.  Most women spend a lot of time single or as single mothers!  How great it is to have it all!  How few do!"