PAMELA HARRIMAN in ART OF SEDUCTION by ROBERT GREENE

ART OF SEDUCTION by Robert Green

EXCERPTS:

pages 86-87 PAMELA is a CHARMER...

The world is full of self absorbed people. In their presence, we know that everything in our relationship with them is directed toward themselves, their insecurities, their neediness, their hunger for attention...

page 273

From the 1940's into the early 1960's Pamela Churchill Harriman had a series of affairs with some of the most prominent and wealthy men in the world - Averill Harriman (whom years later she married), Gianni Agnelli (Heir to the Fiat Fortune), Baron Elie de Rothschild. What attracted these men, and kept them in her thrall, was not her beauty or her lineage or her vivacious personality, but her extraordinary attention to detail. It began with her attentive look as she listened to your every world, soaking up your tastes. Once she found her way into your home, she would fill it with your favorite flowers, get your chef to cook that dish you had tasted in the finest restaurants. You mentioned an artists you liked? A few days later that artist would be attending one of your parties. She found the perfect antiques for you, dressed in the way that most pleased or excited you, and she did this without your saying a word - she spied, she gathered information from third parties, overheard you talking to someone else. Harriman's attention to detail had an intoxicating effect on all the men in her life. It had something in common with the pampering of a mother, there to bring order and comfort into their lives, attending to their needs. 

LIFE IS HARSH AND COMPETITIVE

Attending to detail in a way that is soothing to the other person makes them dependent upon you. The key is probing their needs in a way that is not too obvious, so that when you make precisely the right gesture, it seems uncanny.  As if you just read their mind... This is another way of returning your targets to childhood, when all of their needs were met...