I'm a Filipino woman who has been in the United States since she was a teenager. When I was in my late teens I was discovered by a film director in Hollywood. Although I worked on a production with him, he retired me and kept me for a few years. Then after we ended our relationship, I met a man who owns a factory in Ventura County. I gave up any career in Hollywood and moved in with him. I love him and I live my whole life around him.
He said that he was interest in marrying me but had a bad divorce 20 years before. He has a daughter from that marriage. He said he didn't want to marry until his daughter came of age. Well, she did. He hasn't married me. I travel to Vegas with him frequently. I want for nothing, including good jewelry. Our home in Ventura is modest. No one suspects how rich he really is. THERE IS NO WIFE IN THIS SITUATION EXCEPT THE GHOST OF THE EX!
Recently I met a male friend of his who told me that I am his fifth mistress. Once a mistress presses for marriage, he breaks with her and finds another one. I'm in my late 30's. I really want a child. Should I accept the situation or press for marriage and take my chances? He is 65 and shows no signs of retiring.
Champagne Tastes, Ventura County, California ----
Dear Champagne Tastes,
I'd really like to put this one out there for opinions.
My guess is that a man who is 65 and has had several mistresses since his bad marriage broke up long ago is not someone who wants to get married - ever. He's probably thinking of his daughter and her inheritance of his estate. However, it is not fair for you to be kept out of having a career to live around him if he is not going to provide for you in case of a "divorce" or when you are old and alone, without children or any other man to take care of you. It is time to tell this man that he must provide for you because of the circumstances of your life and if he will do this, you will never press for marriage.
You should also be clear that you want a child. Whatever he does, your lawyer (not his) should create a contract that will stand up in court.Your man is aging and should be able to try on what it means to be alone in life.
Report Back In Champagne Tastes !
Missy
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