Monday, April 17, 2017

DECLARATION FOR MISTRESSES - Being a Girlfriend Who'se Good and True - Fair and Foul Weather Friend

Reading Holly Madison's memoir about living in the Playboy Mansion as one of Hugh Hefner's Girlfriends, and then as the Main Girlfriend, and how she survived it, made me sad.  Despite being called a "Girlfriend" she had no good and true friends in the situation, and the situation was her life, unless you count one of the older women who had been with Hef as an assistant for decades who seemed to be there for her a little.  (I'm skeptical.)

Holly would hope for someone new to be a friend, even recruit one, but the new woman's competitiveness or personality or drug addiction would soon end that hope. Who was there to speak with intelligence about any of her interests or real feelings?  Not Hef.  He chauvinistically had his circle of men friends for that. It does seem like his type was Blonde Bimbo, and Holly was willing to pretend to be that and act as if. She was alone and lonely surrounded by people.

It's always possible to have a "girlfriend" who is actually a man, gay or straight, platonic. There is something to be said for having other women, who live in a female body, and have female body issues like you do, as a friend.  I'm using the term girlfriend here to mean someone you are not sexual or romantic with.  (I know it may sound a little old fashioned or confuse some people but I don't mean necessarily a lesbian romance.) 

They say it takes being one to have one.  So, be a Good and True friend to at least one other woman.  Be that person who can listen well, understand or try to, have empathy, and be trustworthy. Be there when she needs you.  Save her reputation. Help her get good work. As in all relationships there has to be some give and take, as well as being both responsible for keeping the relationship going, no matter what's going on. 

Choose her well.  Then stick with her.

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