I wondered how I was going to make it through the year of 2020 researching and writing this blog. For a while I thought I would have to publish every other month - that could still happen. But not for the reason I thought. Rather Google has forced a so called "upgrade" on Google Blogger that is beyond a learning curve, it is a time waster. It has left me unable to easily find my research and so on and when I look for past posts and potential future posts, I feel like screaming. Repetitive messages to Google stating that I wanted to remain a Legacy Blogger of no use. So maybe it's time to move this blog to another company?
With all the libraries closed, my access to actual books, as I rarely buy them to research, has been limited. I had to look through my notes on books I read in the past - as well as consider that using the Internet perhaps more than I normally would. However, these limitations also made me think and work in a different way, perhaps a more modern way.
Meanwhile, I wondered how some of the people who read MISTRESS MANIFESTO BLOGSPOT, people whose extramarital relationships are what keeps them going, were doing. You see, every time I think that maybe I'm going to run out of people to feature in the blog, I learn about someone else who was or is Kept, at least a little Kept, or another book, or sometimes a reader leaves a suggestion about someone I should research in comments.
So some people wonder WHY DO I DO IT? WHY DO I WORK SO HARD ON THIS BLOG?
LIKE YOU probably, like most people, I came to maturity thinking that love and marriage would come naturally to me, and that marriage was for a life time and I expected loyalty and faithfulness. I was surrounded by people who came to marriage that same way, with that same expectation, as well as a sense of religious responsibility, and you could say, duty, to their spouses. It was rare for anyone I knew to get a divorce. One of my best high school friends never mentioned that her parents were going through a rather brutal divorce because they continued to live in the same house and share child care. Divorce was a shameful thing. I heard the details years later.
Then some of my friends naturally progressed into marriage and I did not. I got my heart broken, though some of them had experienced that too, and then found someone they wanted to marry. I got over my broken heart and wanted independence. My women friends were from intact families, had parents who stayed married, and seemed to go into their marriages with all the right reasons. I'll never forget one of my best women friends telling me, "I like him, I love him, and I'm in love with him," so I'm marrying him. Wow!
But within a couple years she was having a hot affair with the new Mr. Right, a man in her workplace. I thought she was asking to be caught and loose her career. It ended and she stayed with Mr. Wrong.
My women friends married, divorced, remarried, divorced, had affairs - some of which they hoped would lead to another marriage. Then, I learned that some of them were being Kept - at least for a little while. That isn't how they put it. More it would be about how they had seen so and so and he had given them a little money to help them out or that he bought a car - or a house. What was happening that so many smart, pretty - even beautiful, women, educated, nice personalities, in my opinion desirable women, were having such a rough time of romance? Were they settling in being Kept rather than settle into a bad marriage?
To face reality, I had to face the fact that while affairs are rather common; some of them break marriages and some do not. Some people stay married and have long term extramarital relationships. Some people are married and divorced several times in this life - serial monogamists. Some people, especially women, despite their educations, do not earn a good income, and really do need the financial help of someone who is doing better than they are and that someone is usually a man. Some people love more than one person at a time. I could go on, but the point is Mistresses exist, have existed historically for centuries, and they are fascinating people.
I learned that the books that sell the best are romance novels - bodice rippers - and women who read them are often fantasizing about a romance outside their relationship. They are trying on being seduced or becoming a Mistress. What are the stereotypes? And so, I decided to look into it and try to come up with more answers than questions.
Within MISTRESS MANIFESTO BLOGSPOT you will find many people - mostly women who were famous enough that books were written about them or by them - to learn about. You may come to some understanding. You may find you're just like one or another. You may make a decision about what's happening in your own life. You may find compassion for someone you don't think you're anything like. You may discover you want to be married. Or never marry. Or that you do or don't want to stay in a relationship as is. Or have more than one partner at a time. That you are not as conventional and rule bound as you thought.
I look forward to another year of Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot and hope you'll continue to read!
Best Wishes for the New Year!
Missy
Meanwhile, I wondered how some of the people who read MISTRESS MANIFESTO BLOGSPOT, people whose extramarital relationships are what keeps them going, were doing. You see, every time I think that maybe I'm going to run out of people to feature in the blog, I learn about someone else who was or is Kept, at least a little Kept, or another book, or sometimes a reader leaves a suggestion about someone I should research in comments.
So some people wonder WHY DO I DO IT? WHY DO I WORK SO HARD ON THIS BLOG?
LIKE YOU probably, like most people, I came to maturity thinking that love and marriage would come naturally to me, and that marriage was for a life time and I expected loyalty and faithfulness. I was surrounded by people who came to marriage that same way, with that same expectation, as well as a sense of religious responsibility, and you could say, duty, to their spouses. It was rare for anyone I knew to get a divorce. One of my best high school friends never mentioned that her parents were going through a rather brutal divorce because they continued to live in the same house and share child care. Divorce was a shameful thing. I heard the details years later.
Then some of my friends naturally progressed into marriage and I did not. I got my heart broken, though some of them had experienced that too, and then found someone they wanted to marry. I got over my broken heart and wanted independence. My women friends were from intact families, had parents who stayed married, and seemed to go into their marriages with all the right reasons. I'll never forget one of my best women friends telling me, "I like him, I love him, and I'm in love with him," so I'm marrying him. Wow!
But within a couple years she was having a hot affair with the new Mr. Right, a man in her workplace. I thought she was asking to be caught and loose her career. It ended and she stayed with Mr. Wrong.
My women friends married, divorced, remarried, divorced, had affairs - some of which they hoped would lead to another marriage. Then, I learned that some of them were being Kept - at least for a little while. That isn't how they put it. More it would be about how they had seen so and so and he had given them a little money to help them out or that he bought a car - or a house. What was happening that so many smart, pretty - even beautiful, women, educated, nice personalities, in my opinion desirable women, were having such a rough time of romance? Were they settling in being Kept rather than settle into a bad marriage?
To face reality, I had to face the fact that while affairs are rather common; some of them break marriages and some do not. Some people stay married and have long term extramarital relationships. Some people are married and divorced several times in this life - serial monogamists. Some people, especially women, despite their educations, do not earn a good income, and really do need the financial help of someone who is doing better than they are and that someone is usually a man. Some people love more than one person at a time. I could go on, but the point is Mistresses exist, have existed historically for centuries, and they are fascinating people.
I learned that the books that sell the best are romance novels - bodice rippers - and women who read them are often fantasizing about a romance outside their relationship. They are trying on being seduced or becoming a Mistress. What are the stereotypes? And so, I decided to look into it and try to come up with more answers than questions.
Within MISTRESS MANIFESTO BLOGSPOT you will find many people - mostly women who were famous enough that books were written about them or by them - to learn about. You may come to some understanding. You may find you're just like one or another. You may make a decision about what's happening in your own life. You may find compassion for someone you don't think you're anything like. You may discover you want to be married. Or never marry. Or that you do or don't want to stay in a relationship as is. Or have more than one partner at a time. That you are not as conventional and rule bound as you thought.
I look forward to another year of Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot and hope you'll continue to read!
Best Wishes for the New Year!
Missy
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