"HOT GIRLS WANTED" FILM RAISED MY FEMINIST ANGER

Over the  New Years holidays I had some down time to do nothing but watch films and among the many I watched was HOT GIRLS WANTED, a documentary that came out a few years ago.  I was unprepared with how upset I would feel watching it, learning that there are more hits to pornography sites than all the hits to Google and several other major sites, and most of it is amateur (meaning unpaid) porn that young women, 18-21, have posted themselves, in an attempt to gain popularity, competitively for hits, and to try to launch themselves into the professional porn industry. Much of the porn is degradation and violence against women so the men who like this stuff are clearly too screwed up and should be avoided - if you learn the truth about them in time.  Apparently many men are investing in that. Obviously their hatred of women and sexual perversion (I know - an unpopular word these days) results in wanting to see pretty beautiful women being treated horribly.  

My feminist anger rose. 

I had no idea about some of it. And I thought about all the women friends I've had who started hating dating and hating sex and hating men because they were treated so badly, though not as badly as these women were. 

I reminded myself that MISTRESS MANIFESTO BLOGSPOT is a Woman's Studies site basically and how in college almost no men took a Woman's Studies class.

These turned-pro porn actresses knew in advance what they were going to do, yes. They were offered pay and were paid. Some got sick, tired, disillusioned.  One was lucky enough to end up with a boyfriend who loved her anyway.

There is money in it, but not necessarily money enough for saving for one's future, such as paying for an education to gain a career or to invest for one's old age. The average young woman answers an ad such as on Craig's List and takes a free flight to Florida. It's explained that while Los Angeles, perhaps more specifically The San Fernando Valley - Chatsworth, had been the porn capital, once the law changed and actors had to use protection, Florida has no such laws.  Hello VD, AIDS, unplanned pregnancy?

Parents usually find out in about a month. Neighbors are looking at these porn sites and recognize the woman they graduated high school or went to college with. The small town these women fled for this experience may never allow them to forget it. Is there life after porn?  Since this seems to be a Internet-generational experience, perhaps because it's so common, more yes than no?  Still, I feel sorry for young women who choose this experience which I feel is part of their youth and inexperience, their immaturity but I question, seriously, why anyone would want to trade their self respect and self esteem for money in such a blatant, harsh, and cruel way.  

Where is the love?

The young man who is something of a procurer/agent/middle man and who lets them live with him seems also to have no interest in life other than making money.  I wonder if it's world of sociopaths we're living in.  These "girls" are used up and spit out. 

And so I think love is in short supply. 

If you have it, cherish it. 

Missy

THERE'S A PAIR

HEIDI FLEISS and HER BIRDS - SHE ASKS "ARE WE THAT SELFISH?"

It's time for Heidi to form a Non Profit and take donations for the care of her birds.  She needs a lawyer and an accountant - people around her who aren't sketchy characters.  I honor her for finding her life's work in this endeavor.

Missy



From the article by John Lavitt in Fix :

Heidi said, "You pretty much got it.  After prison, I did see the world differently.  I saw a beautiful macaw in a cage, and it really bothered me.  I asked the owner when was the last time it was out of its cage. She said, "I don't know.  Maybe 20 or 30 years." The bird actually had dust on it.  I realized I could not go on with my life, knowing that bird was still in that cage.  It seemed so awful to have wings and be stuck in a cage, of all things.  Imagine 45 years in a basement with another 45 to go.  ... We are a civilized society. How can we do this? The subjugation of this species is selfish and self absorbed.  It's a torturous, bleak, existence.  It;s so painful for them because their bodies aren't meant for sedentary lives.  They struggle with this lonely, painful existence.  Do you really think these animals with wings are on this earth to say bad words and dance for us?  It's disgusting, and everybody should find it offensive.  Are we really that selfish?

THE FIX: HEIDI FLEISS SEX DRUG REALITY


And this article: PV TIMES -HEIDI FLEISS BEMOANS PARROT PREDICAMENT IN PAHRUMP  by Selwyn Harris - Pahrump Valley Times

This is the story of a bird who flew off and was finally found and returned.

Excerpt: As far as how many birds I own, I think one is too many," she said with a laugh.  "If I could, I just want to help every macaw that is stuck inside a cage, beauce I think putting a living creature that has wings inside a cage, is fundamentally wrong; it;s perverse and obscene.  I gave up a very fancy and spoiled life for them.  There is no financial benefit for me. ...

DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE CYCLE OF DOMESTIC ABUSE IS?

HOPE AND SAFETY ORG : LEARN ABOUT THE CYCLE OF ABUSE and DOMESTIC VIOLENCE  There are many sites on the internet that have explanations but this one seems to have gone a bit further. Please explore this site.

EXCERPT:  By 1983, women working in the Anti-violence Movement realized the Tension Building /Explosion model was flawed.  Abusers do not harm their intimate partners because of tension and stress.  As Humans, each of us feels stress and tension in our lives and yet, we do not make the choice to abuse someone else.  If it were a matter of tension the abusive person would be unable to control his behavior and would batter whoever was causing the stress (ie. the boss who yells at him or police officers who pull him over, etc.) Also abusers would not be able to control where their punches landed.  Many abusers "Target Punch" their partners - specifically targeting areas where the bruises and marks are less likely to be seen - the beck, back upper torso, and lets.

*** It is not up to the woman to make the relationship work.  Blaming the victim - that she isn't quiet enough or doesn't keep the house clean enough - for instance - can be an excuse for an abuser to let loose on her.

HEIDI FLEISS ANSWERS QUESTIONS ON AS IT LAYS

Interesting! Truly!  As it Lays is a very odd show. Clearly you can't be the interviewee and ask the interviewer any questions.

But I get it.  It's almost like talking to yourself!

HEIDI IS SORRY SHE GOT HER DAD IN TROUBLE and WISHES SHE'D TAKEN SCHOOL MORE SERIOUSLY

HOLLYWOOD REPORTER INTERVIEW OF HEIDI FLEISS 25th ANNIVERSARY OF HER ARREST by Seth Abramovich

Excerpt from Interview Article:

You came from a fairly conservative background. Your dad was a doctor.

I was born and raised in LA.  My dad was a famous pediatrician.  When he died, they donated a bench to him at the Griffith Park Observatory.

Did he know about your escort service?

No.  But I got him in big trouble.  I felt shitty about that.  Dad gave me really the best childhood possible and all of the opportunity in front of me.  I wish that I took school seriously and went a different route, but it was not my father's fault at all.

THE PLAYERS HANDBOOK - ANOTHER BOOK by EX MADAM HEIDI FLEISS

New image August 2022

SAINT PATRICK'S DAY

 

SHE HAD 500 "GIRL NEXT DOOR" PROSTITUTES WORKING FOR HER and a DRUG ADDICTION

THE FIX: HEIDI FLEISS - SEX DRUGS REALITY by John Lavitt

EXCERPT: When Fleiss was arrested in 1993 for charges including attempted pandering, her escort service employed 500 beautiful girls-next-door who were like porn stars in the bedroom. They charged clients what today would be almost $3000 a night, and Fleiss grew rich by keeping 40 percent of those earnings.  Partying hard and living in the fast lane led to struggles with addiction.



Missy here!  A  great article and interview of Heidi from 2019, lots about addiction.

HEIDI FLEISS and IVAN NAGY - HEIDI IN THE CYCLE OF ABUSE

From Once More With Feeling by Jeanne Parrent (with author Bruce W. Cook), quoting Jennifer Young, the daughter of actor Gig Young.

"Heidi was a bright girl. She said she liked older men because younger ones weren't smart enough for her.  I'm not so sure she picked the best older man however.  Around the time she was breaking up with Bernie (Cornfeld), she met Ivan Nagy.  That was the real beginning of the Heidi Fleiss story."

OK, readers of Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot,  Let us pause here in Jennifer Young's testimonial about her old friend Heidi Fleiss.  To this point Heidi was not a prostitute.  She was a young woman obsessed with an older man who had not been faithful and who thought he had given her so much materially as his Mistress that she owed him but he broke her heart.  She might have even thought, as many women do when their man cheats on them (and let's them catch him in the act) that if only she were better in bed, then she could get him back.  She might have even thought, as some women do, that she would prove to him (and herself) that other men found her desirable by sleeping around.  Jennifer was also in a relationship in which she was being badly abused. Jennifer reveals that Heidi had also become pregnant by Bernie and had an abortion.  No doubt this effected her mind. (Pages 254-255 and 257)

Jennifer tells that Ivan was like Bernie (not exclusive with Heidi sexually) but that he wanted to "screw all of Heidi's friends."  So Heidi went from bad to worse.  They had heated arguments.  (Have you ever been entirely drained from Arguments?) Heidi packed up and left but bounced back to Bernie.  Jennifer reports that she could have bailed out on both men.  She was running hot and cold - sounds confused to me - and might have even slept with Jennifer's boyfriend.  (Page 255)

At some time unknown but during this time in her life Heidi became an "escort.  Bisexual Heidi was having sex with women too. And she was using drugs.

It was about 1988 when Heidi told Jennifer she was a Madam which explained her purchase of a black Corvette convertible car and new wealth. (Page 257)

CORONAVIRUS-19 UPDATE here at MISTRESS MANIFESTO BLOGSPOT

Hello Readers,

I'm aware that during this crisis, a Pandemic of the Coronavirus-19, more people are staying home, keeping busy, and may be reading this blog, MISTRESS MANIFESTO BLOGSPOT. on the Internet.  Welcome!

I'm well and currently not personally worried, though many of the plans I made have been cancelled. This gives me more time to research and work on this blog, as well as go down my list of things to do that I back burnered.  I've enjoyed walking in the rain these last couple days, my pink umbrella over my head in contrast to the grey skies and between rains the sky has been glorious with white puffy clouds in a vivid blue.

I've read around the subject, listened to videos of news and announcements, hard news and conspiracy theories, and have been the recipient of a print out circulated by a senior citizen that supposedly comes from one of the doctors in Wuhan, China, with warnings about how to conduct ourselves to stay virus-free.  The truth is there's lots of contradictory advice.

As I told my senior citizen friend who gave me the handout, it makes sense that we would cancel or not attend events with over 200 people but come on - it only takes one person to one person contact to get the virus.  Statistics, as my professor in college liked to say, can indicate but not predict.  The economic impact of the crisis is apparent, though if this passes in a month, I think we will catch up economically.  What the authorities are trying to do is ease the number of cases that our emergency workers have to deal over time rather than have a more sudden rise.  This gives more time to understand the disease, do testing, and come up with a vaccine.

If you by some chance have not heard about the warnings, the basic things you can do to try and not spread or prevent contracting this scary disease include washing your hands frequently and be careful not to sneeze, cough, or share bodily fluids with others. (Skip sex.)

I'm doing the following to reduce my chances.

I'm carrying  sanitizing wet wipes with me and using them to touch door handles, elevator buttons, and public toilet flushers.

I'm wearing a big loose scarf around my neck which I can raise to my face if I feel I need to cover my mouth and nose or protect myself from people who sneeze and cough.

I'm carrying a bottle of hand sanitizer with me and a bar of soap, should I encounter situations where I need to wash my hands and none is provided.

I'm waving hello rather than shaking hands.

I'm making big pots of nutritious soup, eating citrus, and taking vitamin supplements, particularly vitamin C.

I'm getting sleep.

If hand sanitizer is not available on your store shelves, the main ingredient can be alcohol and you can wipe your hands with that, or mix it with aloe vera gel (sometimes sold as an after-tan product) to make your own.  There are several YouTube videos showing how to mix that up.

I have not horded supplies.

Some time off can be a good thing.

Take Care!

Missy

2020 Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot All Rights Reserved including Internet and International Rights.

THREE MACAWS

FOR HEIDI and BERNIE IT WAS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT BUT...

From Once More With Feeling by Jeanne Parrent (with author Bruce W. Cook), quoting Jennifer Young, the daughter of actor Gig Young.  According to the book, Jennifer's father was not much in her life, especially as he commit suicide when she was fourteen.  She went to Beverly Hills High School and was a partier - sex and drugs.  Her mother became a successful realtor.  She and Heidi met at a club called Helena's owned by actor Jack Nicholson. They became instant best friends and eventually became room mates in 1985. Their friendship lasted about four years and began well before Heidi became the Hollywood Madam in 1988. (Pages 227, 251-251)

"When we first met Heidi was waitressing at Cravings Restaurant on Sunset."  They went to a big party attended by celebrities at Bernie Cornfeld's. It was Jennifer's invitation. "I introduced him to Heidi and the two of them fell head over heels for each other instantly."  Bernie owned a modeling agency called Max Modeling and Heidi began to work there as well as travel to Europe with him and the models.  "After a while Heidi moved into Bernie's house. Things seem to be going all right until one day she walked in on him having sex with another woman.  She was so upset that she tried killing herself, slitting her wrists."
(Page 253)

Revenge sex began.

"He yelled at Heidi, screaming about all he had done for her, about the car he gave her, the clothes, the house to live in. (Missy here, I think he means allowing her to live in his house with him.)  The opportunities and this was how she repaid him."  She just listened and didn't bother to mention his double standards when it came to fidelity. (Page 254)

It was as this drama was unfolding that Heidi began going between her dad's place and Bernie's and that she and Jennifer decided to become room mates.

We'll continue with this story in a future post.

RED AND YELLOW MACCAW

By Edward Lear in 1832

HEIDI FLEISS ON AN OLD CRIME WATCH DAILY

FROM 2015... Dennis Hof died in October 2018

PANDERINGS by HEIDI FLEISS

Available at my local library! 
I enjoyed looking through this artistic scrapbook-type effort. Reading through it may just give you some insight into Heidi's mind at the time she put it together.

HEIDI FLEISS : GIRL NEXT DOOR TO HOLLYWOOD MADAM TO BIRD SANCTUARY! WAS BEING KEPT THE TURNING POINT FOR THIS UNUSUAL WOMAN?

HEIDI FLEISS - MISTRESS OF THE MONTH

The book Once More With Feeling by Jeanne Parrent (with author Bruce W. Cook) is the primary reference for this month's posts.  (The image on the book is a model and is not Heidi.) This book cover image was added August 2022. At the time I originally posted, no image was available.

I also watched the film "Call Me: The Rise and Fall of Heidi Fleiss" as part of my research and don't know how fictive it is.  It's on YouTube and came out in 2004. I read numerous articles on the Internet about HEIDI FLEISS' life, her arrest, trials, prison, and attempts to resurrect herself as a business woman.

In the pages before Once More With Feeling begins, it is stated that the information that is presented (which includes name dropping celebrities including Heidi Fleiss) was both verified by lie detector test and by a private investigator. That's compelling!  Parrent is known for a couple other "tell all" books including "You'll Never Make Love In This Town Again." The passages about Heidi come from one of the women who talked about her own life in Los Angeles as the daughter of a famous actor, Jennifer Young, whose dad was actor Gig Young. Jennifer was once a roommate with Heidi. 



Here at Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot, we learn that having a Sugar Daddy for a semester in college, a brief affair with a celebrity, or a thing with your married boss after hours probably isn't enough to fairly be called a "Mistress" or "Kept."  Yet we also know that being a Mistress does not require being Kept - financially supported by a man.

Last month we looked at a new lexicon for describing sexuality.  This month I want to start with the lexicon that's been used to describe Mistresses, Madams, and Sex Traffickers.

We know what a Classic Mistress is: she is a woman who is fully financially supported by a man, sometimes for many years or life - a house, investments - and can be called Kept.  She doesn't have to worry about money though she may have to find something to do to keep her busy during his absences and is on call when he's available. Perhaps she travels with him and inhabits one of his houses or has children with him - a second (or third or fourth... family for him - which he visits in another town or country as he travels for business. Usually she is unmarried but he is. 

Some people think that the era of the Classic Mistress is over. For sure there are probably many Classic Mistresses we will never know about because being very discrete, private, and secretive is usually part of their success. This blog would not be possible if it depended on my personal associations and relies on the famous or infamous, many whom have had books written about them or who have written their own memoirs.

Modern Mistresses tend to have their own work and income and involvement with a man may not be financial at all (so invalidating the Kept Woman stereotype) or her man simply makes life more pleasing with his financial contribution to their arrangement.  She may hesitate or refuse to actually quit her education or job or career.  She may be hoping that he will eventually marry her or she may have settled into the life she loves because she loves him. There are many possibilities.

Or there may be a "role reversal" and a woman may be Keeping a man the way Husbands used to keep Wives. I believe this is happening more and more often and sometimes the woman doesn't make much money but still does not require her man work for income.

The word "Madam" as in Hollywood Madam, which Heidi Fleiss was called, after her mentor, the previous Hollywood Madam, Alex Adams, was called that, also seems to be wrongly used and confused in the media.  

For instance I read one article on Ghislaine Maxwell, a woman accused of the serious offences of sex trafficking,  which called her Jeffery Epstein's Madam. There is no reason to think that any person who does not take a percentage or cut for introducing prostitutes to customers is a Madam and so I don't think that's the right term to use on Ghislaine. The accusations against Ghislaine Maxwell are that she was a "procurer" of underage girls and that she also abused them - or joined in sexually -making her someone who sexually assaulted underage girls.  Under the age of 18 girls are by law not considered mature enough to make adult decision and they are not adult women who chose to prostitute. And so if Ghislaine is guilty, and as I understand it from extensive reading around the Internet she cannot even be found to go on trial, then she would also rightly be called a sex trafficker.  But Madam?  No. And frankly, though being innocent and underage or scared to quit a relationship is important to consider, some of the girls and young women who Epstein may have used and paid, went home and came back again and again - and that goes against them.

The opposite of Madam? The word "Pimp" is applied to men who run prostitutes, generally thought of the less well paid "street walker" prostitute. Pandering is more often applied to a woman who provides introductions. Escorts are women who will likely have sex on "dates" but supposedly don't have to, at least not every time since a client might not want more than company or a kind of fake date to take somewhere when he isn't dating anyone. 

I recall from a Woman's Studies class I took in college that historically Madam's  (Women who owned brothels) generally provided better pay and conditions for prostitutes (and often, historically, their housing) and that generally things got more violent when men, as Pimps, took over. I also learned in a Woman's Studies class that casual prostitution, such as having one or two men other than one's husband or because one did not have a husband to make ends meet was not uncommon in the 19th century America. For some prostitution was and is the only way to prevent one's starvation (and that of children) or homelessness.

Sometimes a woman has no choice.  Sometimes a woman does.

I personally have a difficult time even imagining what it must be to prostitute.

So - So Heidi Fliess, the Girl Next Door whom I'm also electing to be our Mistress of the Month here at Mistress Manifesto, was properly called "The Hollywood Madam," though one book she wrote is called "Pandering." (She also wrote The Players Handbook for Men.)

She took a percentage of the earnings of those who worked for her - 40% - which they themselves turned over to her, in a kind of gentlewoman's agreement.  She was thus rightfully called a Madam.

In 1987 at the age of only 22 years old, she became a protégé of the previous Hollywood Madam, Alex.  in 1990 she became a Madam herself.  She was arrested on June 9, 1993. She was charged with pandering. She'd been earning -approximately half a million a year.  With inflation a typical sex for money arrangement would be about $3000 a night today. She hid money from the IRS with the help of her dad, who also got in trouble.  She spent 1997-2000 in a federal prison.

According to Heidi Fliess' own testimonial, there will never be another Madam in Hollywood like her again. She mentions she was only about 26 years old when she became a major success in that world. She saw and sees her time being a Madam to some of the highest paid prostitutes in history and introductions she made to some of the wealthiest and most important men to have been a win-win situation for her and her "girls." She says her girls were all looking for rich men to date and would likely have had sex for free on those dates. Instead they profited so that they could, assuming they saved and invested, and have more choice about their lives - their education - their own businesses.  Unlike Madam Alex, she refused to give the police information passed on to her by her prostitutes to them in exchange for being able to stay in business.

She wasn't the first and probably isn't the last Hollywood Madam.  In my opinion someone else has to be at it. I personally have not heard of any names.

Heidi, in a Madam's Code of Honor, also refused to name names from her so called "Little Black Book," which means she was honorable as a Madam and didn't take down anyone else when she was arrested and put out of business. (It's said that many in Hollywood and Corporate America sighed with relief.) Heidi eventually seems to have lost everything though she has made efforts to be a successful business person since the scandal.  She moved to Nevada and hoped to open a brothel for women clients there but did not succeed. Her little black book is described as several Gucci bound address books.

How did this Girl Next Door become a Madam?

Heidi Fleiss liked money and the things it could buy her. A daughter in a large family of six children with a doctor for a dad - one who made house calls! - Heidi grew up with enough, not the riches she wanted, but her entry into the social world of Los Angeles - Hollywood, allowed her to come into contact with some of the most powerful and important people in the world, not just in "the business" or "industry" of film making, but, she says, politics too. She was one of the girls who wanted to date rich men. A sports car - a gorgeous house to live in - but also eventually drugs. That's where she was at for some time in her young life.

Heidi could relate to all the young women she met who wanted rich boyfriends and she got one.  She traveled with him as his Mistress and got a taste of the rich life. His name was Bernie Cornfeld. She wanted to please him.  She was hurt and also challenged when she learned he wasn't faithful sexually. But she lived with him, traveled with him, and had sex with him for four years.  In my opinion, she lived the life of a Classic Mistress.  He was not the marrying kind.

Heidi decided she liked men over 40.  Older men.  They liked her.

After Bernie she got another boyfriend, this one, a film producer named Ivan Nagy.  This is where the story goes in a couple directions.  Some say it was Ivan who turned her over to Madam Alex.  He says that when he told Madam Alex he had a girl for her, Alex claimed to already be employing Heidi.

The story goes that Ivan and Heidi were actually a great together, that they sparked each other.  They liked to gamble.  A motivation for Heidi to enter into prostitution might have been to pay off her own gambling debts.

So Ivan Nagy had ties to Madam Alex in Los Angeles and he took her over there to make an introduction. Who was lying, I don't know.  It's also possible that Ivan conspired with Madam Alex to bring Heidi down.  Alex, long an informant to LAPD finally got busted and Heidi used that moment to take over her business.  After she prospered she may have grown tired of Ivan and wanted independence from him.

Heidi seems to have worked in the life as an internship.  She was studying Alex, how she did things, and ambitious to share the business.

She has said that she was "too lazy" to be a good prostitute, but her acumen for business began when she took cuts for referrals to other girls for baby sitting jobs as a teenager.  She and Alex got to be friends and by competing with her mentor, well, maybe Alex had something to do with her getting caught. 

After she did her time and was released she wondered what else she could do.  She considered opening a brothel of studly male prostitutes in Nevada. It didn't work out. She also had a relationship with legal Nevada brothel owner, Dennis Hof, now deceased. As things are today, Heidi lives in Nevada and her home is also a bird sanctuary.  Were I to give Heidi advice, I would tell her to turn her personal advocacy into an official nonprofit for her life's work has found her! Personally, I wish her love.  I think she needs lots of it.  She is paying the price for her gamble while only one of her male clients is known; the actor Charlie Sheen.
She didn't tell on him.

Some time after Heidi Fleiss had served time, I saw and recognized her while I was out and about doing errands.  We smiled at each other though we had never met before. I swear she let her shoulders down for an instant. I thought "She's the girl next door!"  It wasn't until I read the book and saw the film that I realized she had also served time as a Mistress.

Even though I can't imagine being a prostitute and wouldn't want anyone I love to be and I'm very concerned about the terms and conditions of prostitution and the effect having sex for money has on a person's psyche.  Even though I'm against porn because I think it can ruin people for the real sex they're likely to have in their lives... Even though I'm horrified by sex trafficking... I do think that there are some people out there who get into the world's oldest business by choice.

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All Rights Reserved including International and Internet Rights

Please note that in compliance with Google's Public Blogger Guidelines there is no sexually explicit photos or language in this blog, nor links to any sites associated with hiring prostitutes, pornography, etc.  In your comments, please post on topic and consider how you might speak in a college classroom.