SONDRA LOCKE : THE GOOD AND THE BAD OF BEING A MARRIED WOMAN HE CALLED SNOW WHITE - INVOLVED WITH A MARRIED MAN SHE CALLED DADDY : CLINT EASTWOOD

In these passages Sondra Locke's memoir, she describes the good and bad, the benefits and the accommodations, of accepting life with him unmarried, as his mistress. This is the second time I've read the book from cover to cover and I'm sensitive to two things; One that Sondra had no intention of divorcing her husband who she thought of as her only family and that husband, Gordon, was accepting of his wife, Sondra, being another man's mistress. 

It seems that Clint Eastwood was also happy that Sondra stayed married to Gordon. Two, that Sondra was into the relationship for the long haul, even though Clint remained married and she had two abortions and a tubal ligation, giving up any future children with him or another man, at his insistence. In the mid 1970's Gordon was having a romance with another man.

1975 : "Although Clint was clearly Daddy in the dynamics of our relationship, I seemed to bring out the little boy in him. And although he loved me for my childlike nature, he brought out the woman in me. Clint seemed astonished at his need for me, even admitting that he'd never been faithful to one woman - because he'd never been in love before," he confided.  He even made up a song about it: " She made me monogamous."  That flattered and delighted me. I would never doubt his faithfulness and his love for me. (page 145)

In the beginning when we were in Los Angeles, Clint and I stayed in his private  apartment adjacent to his office on the Warners lot. Soon we moved into his small house in Sherman Oaks, which he and Maggie's (Clint's wife) had acquired during his Rawhide success...... (Sondra hated the architecture and interiors but it was a respite from hotel rooms.)

***

1978 : Almost as if it were a nonevent, he answered, "Maggie wants to go to Hawaii."  I stood there dumbstruck.

"What do you mean a vacation? You didn't mention anything  to me." With Clint everything usually came out in little tiny snippets, but this one really threw me.

"Maggie asked about you and I told her," said Clint.

"What do you mean?  What did she say?"......

"She wants us to go there with the kids to see if we can 'work things out,' save our marriage, I guess," he replied.  (page 151)

(Clint said that he told his wife it was not just an affair and that he loved Sondra. This wife filed for a legal separation but not a divorce and did not actually divorce him till 1984.)

***

...  In retrospect it's interesting how the whole 'marriage or not" issue evolved for me with Clint.  In the beginning, I guess I wanted Clint to be divorced and marry me.  ...  Then, as the years went by somehow it did not seem to matter.  I truly believed that Clint and I did not need papers to validate the commitments we had made to each other.... And Clint knew the nature of Gordon's and my relationship, and was unconcerned that legally we were still married. In my conscious mind then, my marriage with Gordon was financial protection for him.  If something happened to me, he would be saved from unnecessary taxes on any assets I would leave behind. ... 

DO YOU THINK SONDRA's MARRIAGE TO A GAY MAN THAT SHE WOULD NOT GIVE UP MADE HER MORE VULNERABLE TO CLINT?