MALE FEMALE MASCULINE FEMININE HETEROSEXUAL HOMOSEXUAL BISEXUAL TRANSSEXUAL : MORE LABELS THAN EVER

This Valentine month here at Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot, I pause a bit from the more usual Mistress of the Month format to look at a special topic... gender and sexuality. 

Do you have a Valentine who isn't heterosexual?



There are more ways to label yourself - and others - than ever. You no longer have to be or choose male or female, heterosexual (straight) or homosexual (gay) or bisexual (excited by both male and female persons) or pansexual (whomever turns you on.) There are MANY labels to describe how you experience yourself in your body and what turns you on and one of those does not include the body.

In keeping my promise to myself and my readers, there won't be anything pornographic in my posts or links. Should I receive comments, I hope some of you will have some suggestions for Mistress of the Month (or Mantress of the Month, a term I came up with for Kept Men) who are in relationships less conventional that the Classic Mistress. Do you know of someone who is perhaps Transgender and being Kept?  (Send me links to books, articles, media...)

Is it possible that the reason Mistresses of the female heterosexual variety are the most known is because as women not fitting a traditional role they are the most scandalous?  Is this a sexist bias?

I want to help you explore these gender and sexuality possibilities because they open up the definition of Mistress; when I hear of a Woman Keeping a Man, which is rarely compared to a Man Keeping a Woman, it's almost always a heterosexual relationship and with that come notions such as traditional roles and "role reversals."  

I've known of Older Gay Men Keeping Much Younger Gay men but there seems not to be many publications on that topic. Is that because it's more common in the gay world and being gay is more scandalous than being Kept?

I find labels only useful when you're seeking one and then only temporarily. Labels can be like a diagnosis. People can be self limiting using labels because once you declare yourself, you're still dealing with other people's expectations and stereotypes. So is claiming to be Pansexual a best option?

An example of how labeling can hurt your psychology? I was introduced to a friend's boyfriend and instead of saying his name and what he does for a living, he said "I'm HIV."  Not I have HIV but AM!  This diagnosis was no doubt life-changing for the man, but he was and is so much more!  OK, those two declared themselves gay long before they were involved with each other.  

I never knew what to think of another couple because the more masculine person, genetically male, kept saying he was NOT gay though he was involved with another man who declared he WAS gay for years. Perhaps Bisexual might have been a more realistic assumption for him because he once had a girlfriend?  Does that leave the option open that before you die you might find a woman attractive?

I'm more of an advocate for your personal privacy about your sexuality than not at a time when people are confusing being Candid with being Honest and Honestly with Transparency and so many people have made themselves public figures in a desire to be popular or famous who aren't even celebrities. I still think it's none of the business of your employer, for instance, what you do sexually or with whom. It's not professional to be talking about your personal sexual adventures or the details of your relationships at work or in your profession.  (The time to mention your commitment to your boss is upon your engagement (if it's in the papers) or by invitation to your wedding when you might have to change insurance.  Until then, don't take anyone on a date to the office party!)  I guess I still think there are situations were Coming Out is not a good idea. After all, you might change your mind or have an experience you never thought you would.

To research for this month I encountered lots of information on the internet that I want to share with you.  I'll also try to have some fun with this topic and give my opinions.  After all, we can't always be serious.

Missy

PS:  As mentioned in Pages, Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot complies with the Google Public Blogger guidelines and there are no sexually graphic images or language here.  There are no ads attached at all as I have not approved any.

Please keep any COMMENTS to the level of college classroom discussion.  I ask a lot of questions in this post.  Perhaps you'll want to answer one of them!