Missy,
My 19 year old daughter Kaitlin has taken up with a 42 year old wolf. I'm 45 and sick over it. She made it through high school a virgin and is legal now, I realize. She's a good girl whose going to community college part time and working at the mall part time, at (a famous underwear store), and this man likes to sit out on the bench and watch the women shopping in the store, buying bras and teddies. Kaitlin went out and sat on the bench to eat her bag lunch. He asked her out. This wolf drove up outside our house in a Corvette, honked his horn, and Kaitlin ran down the driveway before I could insist on meeting him. Her best friend Jenny came over to talk to me and said she's worried too. Do I still have any parental rights?
My 19 year old daughter Kaitlin has taken up with a 42 year old wolf. I'm 45 and sick over it. She made it through high school a virgin and is legal now, I realize. She's a good girl whose going to community college part time and working at the mall part time, at (a famous underwear store), and this man likes to sit out on the bench and watch the women shopping in the store, buying bras and teddies. Kaitlin went out and sat on the bench to eat her bag lunch. He asked her out. This wolf drove up outside our house in a Corvette, honked his horn, and Kaitlin ran down the driveway before I could insist on meeting him. Her best friend Jenny came over to talk to me and said she's worried too. Do I still have any parental rights?
ANSWER FROM MISSY
Shannon
Dear Shannon,
In 2016? Shannon you will always, and I mean always, be Kaitlin's mom, but while you no longer have parental rights, I've never heard of a legal time limit on parental responsibilities. (You have been a responsible parent by talking to Kaitlin about reproduction and contraception, right?)
You've been a good mom who has watched over your chick like a hawk to get her through high school a virgin (a miracle!) and now Mr. Wolf won't even meet you and discover that his latest conquest has a mom about his age. Meanwhile, you've got to trust that all that upbringing you did has made a lasting impression on Kaitlin and that she'll follow through and cherish your values, which have become hers, even though a typical 19 year old is very experimental. If you hadn't said that her best girl friend talked to you about it, I might not be at all worried. After all, she could have gone away to college and all you'd know is what she'd tell you. But Jenny is worried enough to have violated best friend privilege. To me that's a good reason for a mom to start worrying. I feel that his sitting out on a bench in front of the store to watch women predatory. He could even be a stalker.
Well, what's a mom and best girl friend gonna do? Throw a party - maybe a Sunday afternoon pot luck? - for the girls and make it soon, with almost any excuse that you can come up with, other than Mother's Day or a birthday which would require presents. It should be a casual, fun, get together, whosever left in town that isn't away at college, dig deep into grade school peers, neighbors, altar boys. Get the food on the table, then leave for three and a half hours. Maybe Jenny's mom and you can go get coffee or to a film and watch your watches. If you and Jenny and her mom do a great job of inviting young people, it will remind them that their social set is young. Tell her, "You can invite Mr. Wolf if you like." Then don't pester her about him. Don't ask if he's coming or not. If he shows up, and I suspect he won't, that is also telling. The main thing is that you don't want her to sneak around to see him and you also would like her to have other people to date.
By the way, if you said she was 21, I'd say just leave it alone. But while 18 is legal adulthood, 21 is all grown up. It is really hard I hear to just let children go and get their own life, but this is my best idea for a last effort to keep a smart and hard working young woman who works at an underwear store pure a while longer!
Missy
C 2016 MistressManifesto.Blogspot.com / Missy Rapport All Rights Reserved including Internet and International Rights
Shannon
Dear Shannon,
In 2016? Shannon you will always, and I mean always, be Kaitlin's mom, but while you no longer have parental rights, I've never heard of a legal time limit on parental responsibilities. (You have been a responsible parent by talking to Kaitlin about reproduction and contraception, right?)
You've been a good mom who has watched over your chick like a hawk to get her through high school a virgin (a miracle!) and now Mr. Wolf won't even meet you and discover that his latest conquest has a mom about his age. Meanwhile, you've got to trust that all that upbringing you did has made a lasting impression on Kaitlin and that she'll follow through and cherish your values, which have become hers, even though a typical 19 year old is very experimental. If you hadn't said that her best girl friend talked to you about it, I might not be at all worried. After all, she could have gone away to college and all you'd know is what she'd tell you. But Jenny is worried enough to have violated best friend privilege. To me that's a good reason for a mom to start worrying. I feel that his sitting out on a bench in front of the store to watch women predatory. He could even be a stalker.
Well, what's a mom and best girl friend gonna do? Throw a party - maybe a Sunday afternoon pot luck? - for the girls and make it soon, with almost any excuse that you can come up with, other than Mother's Day or a birthday which would require presents. It should be a casual, fun, get together, whosever left in town that isn't away at college, dig deep into grade school peers, neighbors, altar boys. Get the food on the table, then leave for three and a half hours. Maybe Jenny's mom and you can go get coffee or to a film and watch your watches. If you and Jenny and her mom do a great job of inviting young people, it will remind them that their social set is young. Tell her, "You can invite Mr. Wolf if you like." Then don't pester her about him. Don't ask if he's coming or not. If he shows up, and I suspect he won't, that is also telling. The main thing is that you don't want her to sneak around to see him and you also would like her to have other people to date.
By the way, if you said she was 21, I'd say just leave it alone. But while 18 is legal adulthood, 21 is all grown up. It is really hard I hear to just let children go and get their own life, but this is my best idea for a last effort to keep a smart and hard working young woman who works at an underwear store pure a while longer!
Missy
C 2016 MistressManifesto.Blogspot.com / Missy Rapport All Rights Reserved including Internet and International Rights
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