Tuesday, March 25, 2014

THE DOORS : CRYSTAL SHIP

Pamela Courson believed that all the songs Jim wrote were about her. Patricia believed that Jim was using her abortion as inspiration for poetry she found in one of his notebooks and was outraged.


Thursday, March 20, 2014

L'WREN SCOTT LESSONS ON THE FIRST DAY OF SPRING : OPINION BY MISSY

Back in April of 2011 I elected JERRY HALL as ? Mistress? of the Month. Jerry is known as the woman who had FOUR children with Mick Jagger.  She wanted to marry him for years and he finally married her, but when they "divorced" the marriage was "annulled."  (I have to ask how so!)   Worth at least $300 million (the reports vary)  Jerry called him "very generous" over a settlement of about $7 million!  (Too bad they didn't have a legal marriage in California - a community property state!)

I also posted about L'WREN SCOTT, who was Mick Jagger's lady for about a decade at that point, and who became his long term "best friend and lover" as he calls her.   She died owing about $6 million and Mick is said to have financed her fashion business for years.

The news that L'Wren Scott commit suicide on this first day of spring, when I should be enjoying the  uplifting weather, has me thinking about her and feeling rather down myself. 

L'Wren was an accomplished stylist to the stars and fashion designer who had been legally married to lesser millionaires than the Rolling Stone's singer twice before.  Reports on the Internet are numerous and mostly repetitive, some suggesting that her business had failed and that she was depressed over remaining unmarried and childless and perhaps not being invited on the Rolling Stone's tour of Australia and New Zealand with their large entourage.

One of the reports that touched me the most was that the actress Ellen Barkin, a good friend of L'Wren's, was one of the people who went and sat with L'Wren's dead body until she was taken away.  And I keep thinking, when I hear L'Wren tied her neck by a scarf to a door handle and knelt, is how that worked.  L'Wren was six foot three or four without the high heels, but I don't get how you kneel and hang!

The act of suicide by one so physically healthy, beautiful, talented, and barely old, is so difficult to understand.  Mick Jagger had two previous girlfriends, in the 1960's, who were also so depressed when he broke with them to have attempted it, Chrissie and Marianne.

But if I may, there are lessons to be learned by L'Wren Scott's life...

**************

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Phone Number


1-800-273-8255
 
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First of all, if you are feeling depressed and isolating yourself, be it over a man, a career, a whole bunch of things or just one damn thing, there is so much help out there for you!  In recent years it's been said that one woman in four will go through a serious bout of depression in her lifetime.  Yes, there are meds and maybe you'll only need them as you talk things out, make some decisions, and go through a rough transition. 

Don't be TOO PROUD to get that help! 

Secondly, I think L'Wren was in the position of being a mistress, not one hidden away, but a mistress, when she wanted to be a wife.  IF YOU WANT TO BE A WIFE, IF YOU WANT LEGAL MARRIAGE, don't get yourself hung up in a relationship with a man who is NOT EXCLUSIVELY AVAILABLE FOR MARRIAGE.  This can be because he is married, because he is adverse to marriage, because he is not ready to be married to anyone, or because he doesn't want to marry you!  (You could almost say that you can't take that personally!)

If your man sleeps around he's putting you in danger.  He can bring home diseases that will wreck your fertility and chances of having children.  I have always heard that Mick Jagger is a sex addict.  I've heard this from people who say they were close to the camp.   I don't know what to think since the man is now 70 and you might think he started slowing down long ago.  But whatever your marital status, when you go to the gyne, get checked for everything, and go often if you or your lover have others.  (Men should also be checked for STD's frequently!)

CNN: CORONER ON SCOTT SUICIDE

If you are thinking of suicide - thinking about pills, guns, scarves, nooses, or elevators to the top of a skyscraper, believe me, you probably are at least temporarily mentally ill. You may be in such pain that you can't think of others any more but believe it, if you kill yourself, you will HURT other people.  

So do you want to HURT THEM or BE OUT OF PAIN YOURSELF?  How about you get well, get out of bad relationships?

Your children especially are owed more. You will leave them abandoned and wondering and you'll leave a legacy for your children to cope with.  So with that last bit of hope you can spare, for them, you must get help.

DON'T LIE TO YOURSELF.  Admitting your weaknesses is as important as admitting your strengths.  Don't get sucked into the denial of "positive thinking" about yourself, your life.  Speak up when you want more or different!  L'Wren is said to have wanted marriage and children but felt that she would loose Mick if she brought it up.   Why is it that so many very accomplished women are AFRAID to tell a man what they want in general or what they want with him when they are giving so much of themselves and their lives to him?

If you've been in a relationship that has been long enough to have a history, sentimentality, ageing, finances, and so much more can KEEP YOU THERE, keep you from leaving.  I'm sure L'Wren felt overwhelmed with failure, as if nothing was going her way, but even if that were so,  her sense of not being valuable on this planet just as a human is heart breaking.*

WHO WAS IT THAT SAID "YOU ARE A HUMAN BEING NOT A HUMAN DOING!"

Note: March 24 - 27 2014 : I have slightly rewritten the original post because when I read it on someone else's computer, I realized it might have been a little confusing.  Tomorrow is L'Wren's funeral in Hollywood.  She was cremated and her ashes split between the Jagger Family and her Utah family.  I do not condemn her to hell eternal for the act of suicide, and I hope she is there in her spirit.  I even feel sorry for Mick Jagger.

Missy Rapport/Mistress Manifesto BlogSpot  C 2014 All Rights Reserved including International and Internet Rights.

 

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

DR. TONI GRANT COINED A FEW PHRASES - POOH BEAR ETERNIS - GHOSTLY LOVER - COURTESAN ASPECT

 
Dr. Toni Grant married and moved away, but she was one of the first talk show hosts on radio to focus on psychology.  People, mostly women, and mostly women who couldn't seem to get and keep relationships going, called in for advice.  Eventually she wrote this book, which I have in my library, and which is aimed at the dynamic woman who can't get married.  (I want to make it clear that's not every woman!)
 
Famous for coining phrases such as Pooh Bear Eternis (the male who never matures) and Ghostly Lover (when you love a man who does not exist, exists only in your imagination, or who you're so hung up on you can't move on to another), and the various aspects of femininity such as the Mother and the Courtesan, Dr. Toni Grant's feminism was seriously questioned.  (Personally I think of her as one type of feminist - there are many!)
 
I've been debating over Pamela and Patricia.  In one scene in her book STRANGE DAYS,  Jim Morrison calls Patricia "Mother."  It's a cut.  He doesn't want her to tell him what to do.  In her book she goes on a bit about the fact that she would not put up with him treating her badly or his drug abuse or alcoholism and Pam would.  Pamela Courson, more vulnerable, clearly dependent, with a pixie-ish voice and girlishness about her, seems to me to be more of a Courtesan, but it's she who goes about telling people she's Jim's wife, while for years Patricia keeps her witch wedding with Jim a secret.
 
 

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

DECLARATION FOR MISTRESSES - Owning your Name

"I will not use his surname as mine when I'm not (legally) married to him."

You may not like the surname you were born with, adopted with, or that you carry from a previous legal marriage, but declaring yourself the owner of his surname when you haven't legally married is, in my strong opinion, out of the question.  (If you've established a career or a reputation in the name you have, it's totally out of the question.  If you simply hate your name, change it, but not to his!)

Declaring such possessiveness will probably get you nowhere, especially if it doesn't work out.  If you marry, then it's your decision to carry his name.   Let him gift it to you then.  The younger you are now, the truer this is.  Carrying on with a name you took in your youth, when there is no longer a relationship, may get in the way of you moving on into another relationship!

Saturday, March 15, 2014

WHO IS THE WIFE? WHO IS THE MISTRESS? PATRICIA? PAMELA?

PATRICIA'S book STRANGE DAYS is my main source for this comparison, though I've read around Pamela a bit too.

PATRICIA

Says to Jim that she doesn't want a traditional or legal marriage and is fine with a long distance relationship with him, that she doesn't want to live with him - that living together could make it boring or destroy their relationship.

Says that she is fine with Jim having sex with other women so long as she's not in town when he does but otherwise acts competitively and bossy.

Is proud that she is highly intelligent, self supporting, a career woman, a feminist, and a witch.  She considers her Celtic witch wedding to be spiritually valid so long as love exists, and claims she doesn't need more.

She enjoys dressing to flaunt her breasts which are larger than Pamela's.  She also feels the need to let Pamela know that she and Jim have had a friendship, are lovers, and chose abortion together when she becomes pregnant - that their relationship is serious - unlike all those other women.  They write letters to each other.

Feels the need to talk to him in person to make the decision about abortion and paying for it is the only money he spends on, though he did buy her some expensive gifts of jewelry.

Says she does not apologize for her drug use which she enjoyed at the time and though describing the use of multiple prescription drugs in response to stress, says she is always in control and not an addict.  Acts shocked when Jim says a problem with Pamela is that she's become a heroin addict.

PAMELA

Tells everyone that she is Jim's "wife," though she knows that's not true, and Jim knows she does and says "so what?"

Has a "Pixish" voice and girlish presence.  A hippie who is "cool" with how things are..

Knows he has other women and let's him know what she thinks of that when she has to hunt him down after standing her up on her birthday - again.   Tells him about how he disappointed her rather than telling him what to do.

Came to Hollywood as a teenage, no education - no college or vocational training, no profession, but does get Jim to spend at least a few hundred thousand so that she can own a boutique called "Themis."  As a business it's a looser, and eventually she can't cope with it.

Strives not to be unkind to Patricia when Patricia may be trying to shock her into a reality about her relationship with Jim.

Jim says he feels responsible for her, because she's dependent and came into the relationship so young.  (Pamela and Patricia are about the same age.)

Less wordy than Patricia but not out to impress anyone with her word choices.  Jim says she could never do what Patricia has and can do.

As a muse, she believes she has been the inspiration for Jim's songs, and that may be true.  She encourages him to move on to being the poet he really wants to be.

May have responded to Jim's "cheating" by also having affairs with other men.  May have prostituted herself from about the time he died to the time all the legal issues were handled after he died and she finally got some money coming in, to support a heroin habit.

Thursday, March 13, 2014

HE'S HORNY AS A GOAT and THAT ATTRACTS FEMALE GOATS!

HUFF POST: GOAT SMELL FEMALES PHEROMONES   by Brian Owens  of the Huffington Post.          


EXCERPTION:

Anyone who has ever spent time around goats knows they have a certain smell. By carefully analyzing eau de male goats, researchers reporting in the Cell Press journal Current Biology on Feb. 27 have now identified a novel, citrus-scented ingredient that speaks directly to the females. It acts on female goats' brains to turn their reproductive systems on.

The distinctive aroma of goats does more than just make barnyards extra fragrant. Male goats can use their heady scent to make female goats ovulate simply by being near them.
Researchers had ascribed this 'male effect' to chemicals known as primer pheromones — a chemical signal that can cause long-lasting physiological responses in the recipient. Examples of primer pheromones are rare in mammals; the male effect in goats and sheep, and a similar effect in mice and rats, where the presence of males can speed up puberty in females, are the only known cases. But exactly what substances are at work and how has remained a mystery.   

*****

I've always wondered if this same thing is what makes humans attracted to each other - or not!

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

PATRICIA KENNEALY : THE LIZARD QUEEN INTERVIEW



The sound quality on this isn't terrific but I thought you would want to get a feeling for Patricia years later - her look and sound.  She's clearly a very intelligent woman.  In her book she notes that back in the 1960's people didn't think about addiction or know what we know now.

Saturday, March 1, 2014

HONORE DE BALZAC said

"A lover always thinks of his mistress first and himself second: with a husband it runs the other way." - Honore de Balzac

MUSING ABOUT MISTRESSMANIFESTO.BLOGSPOT.COM

Good Morning My Faithful Readers, wherever you are - The Phillipines? Russia? Argentina? I've been thinking about YOU, because I check to see where my readers are coming from and sometimes I think "What must it be to be a Mistress in a whole different culture, one that may be more conservative right now, or maybe one that has more newly wealthy entrepreneurs, like Russia does.

For this blog I write about people, mostly women in heterosexual relationships though we know that being kept is not exclusive to women or heterosexuals, I write about people who have become famous or infamous, because it's not my thing to out people who live private lives, and I seek to define Mistress since it's clear that you do not have to be single yourself, involved with an officially married person (what in this age when so many couples do not officially marry and homosexuals are fighting for the right to be married!), or actually be an adulterer to be a Mistress.

That's one of the reasons I'm AMUSED at times CONFUSED at other times by the use of the word MISTRESS in the media. First, even the world COURTESAN has meant different things in different cultures, from being a high class prostitute to simply a woman who is highly accomplished in the arts. Secondly, and I think unfortunaltey, the word Mistres brings up many web sites that are clearly playing on the Sadio-Masocistic aspect of relationships in which a woman, often a prostitute, plays up her domination. Not sure where this started but I think "English boarding schools!" third, the press seems to use the word Mistress for any woman who has simply had an affair with a man of newsworthyness, say a celebracty or a politiocian. So many people are having AFFAIRS today that I back away from the use of Mistress to mean women who are having affairs. Certainly women who go on booty calls are not mistresses, they're simply free spirits at this time in their lives. Then there are the common stereotyupes, and as with all stereotypes maybe there's some truth to them. The stereotyle is an adultress, a "home - wrecker," who tears apart a marriage, or a woman who is simply addicted to the challenge of getting and keeping a man who another woman has claims to. Contrast that with the fact that in some cases,historically and now, there are Mistresses who actually help another woman keep her marriage together. Yes, some wifes and mistresses know of each other and have boundaries but actually are friends! Why is this so surprising at a time when we have come through the "Love The One You're With" Summer of Love, 1960's, and know that some people have chosen to live in polygamous and other relationships peopled by 3 or more?